Did You Know? More Fabulous Facts Folks!

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Not much else needs to be said about today’s post.

Another selection of fabulous facts.

Enjoy.

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did you know1

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At one point in the 1990s,

50% of all CDs produced worldwide were for AOL.

aol_old_cdrom

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A British man changed his name to Tim Pppppppppprice

to make it harder for telemarketers to pronounce.

Tim Pppppppppprice

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Google’s founders were willing to sell to Excite

for under $1 million in 1999

—but Excite turned them down.

(Huge big dumb move, where is Excite today!)

ExciteLogo

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Officials in Portland, Ore., drained 8 million gallons of water

from a reservoir in 2011 because a buzzed 21-year-old peed in it.

Calvin peeing

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When three-letter airport codes became standard,

airports that had been using two letters simply added an X.

LAX

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A California woman once tried to sue the makers of Cap’n Crunch

because Crunch Berries contained “no berries of any kind.”

Cap'n Crunch berries

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Actor Wilford Brimley who has appeared in such films as

The China Syndrome, Cocoon, The Thing and The Firm,

was once Howard Hughes’s bodyguard.

Wilford "Bill" Brimleycirca 1980s

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According to Amazon, the most highlighted Kindle books are

the Bible, the Steve Jobs biography, and The Hunger Games.

amazon-kindle_with_books1-1

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During WWI, German measles were called “liberty measles”

and dachshunds became “liberty hounds.”

liberty measles

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In Spain, Mr. Clean is known as Don Limpio.

Don Limpio

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After leaving office, President Lyndon B Johnson

went all hippy and let his hair grow out.

Lyndon B Johnson long hair

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There was a third Apple founder. Ronald Wayne

he sold his 10% stake for $800 in 1976.

ron_wayne

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If you start counting at one and spell out the numbers as you go,

you won’t use the letter “A” until you reach 1,000.

number_1000

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In Gaddafi’s compound, Libyan rebels found a photo album

filled with pictures of Condoleezza Rice.

gadaffi-loves-condoleeza

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Calvin Klein’s Obsession for Men is used by researchers

to attract animals to cameras in the wilderness.

calvin klein obsession men

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Only one McDonald’s in the world has turquoise arches.

Sedona, AZ thought yellow clashed with the natural red rock.

mcdonalds-sedona_az

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Marie Curie’s notebooks are still radioactive.

Researchers hoping to view them must sign a disclaimer.

curie-notebooks

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The 50-star American flag was designed by an Ohio high school student

for a class project. His teacher originally gave him a B–.

50 star US Flag

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Tsutomu Yamaguchi was in Hiroshima for work

when the first A-bomb hit,

made it home to Nagasaki for the second,

and lived to be 93.

Tsutomu Yamaguchi

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Barry Manilow did not write his hit “I Write the Songs.”

It was actually written by the former Beach Boy Bruce Johnston.

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Beware Of Geeks Bearing GIFs!

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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The clue is always in the title.

Yes, prepare to give you chuckle muscles a workout.

It’s pun day.

Another selection of those jokes you love to hate.

Enjoy   

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rofl

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I’ve been trying to get this computer to work for an hour now.

Wish I’d bought a laptop.

So much lighter to carry.

man-carrying-large-computer

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My friend clearly wears dentures but won’t admit it.

He’s lying through his teeth.

funny-false-teeth-cartoon

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Still thinking of taking that long term job in the PDRK?

Personally I’d choose a different Korea.

north-and-south-korea

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As my wife and three of her friends

squeezed into the car after WeightWatchers,

I muttered under my breath, “Fat cows.”

“What was that?” snapped my wife.

“You herd.”

mad_cow_cartoon

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I thought I was in for the long hall.

But it was just a really big mirror at the end of it.

long hall

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I was in the fitting room when a

beautiful woman walked in holding a lacy bra.

I think she was trying it on.

fitting room cartoon

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Scientists have discovered a new shade of green.

It’s sublime.

sublime_360

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Old MacDonald loves to play with action dolls….

G I G I Joe.

GI Joe

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I clicked on the ‘Home Alone’ link earlier.

It opened a page for an Italian mortgage company.

euro

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I entered my dog in the redneck dog show last week.

She won “Best Inbreed.”

redneck dogs

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Would anyone like to buy any cymbal shaped pillows?

$50 Per cushion.

cymbals

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Think the worst time of my life was when I worked as a cinema usher.

I was in a very dark place back then.

movie_usher

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It’s amazing how a piece of technology as simple

as a tablet can revolutionize your life.

Those viagra are amazing.

viagra_45305

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I’ve found the alcohol which has solved all my problems.

It was liqueur.

liqueur bottles

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I have a lot of hangups.

I blame telemarketers.

telemarketer_cartoon

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I’ve styled my hair so that it appears like I’ve got horns.

It’s my gnu look.

Baby Gnu

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NSA whistleblower Edward Snowden left Moscow Airport a while ago.

He’s no longer hiding in plane site.

CIA-NSA-Edward-Snowden_1

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Bauxite refining is a secret carefully guarded by the aluminati.

aluminium rolls

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I can’t see the new Nicholas Cage action movie doing very well.

He plays a wrongly convicted man, trapped among

a bunch of the world’s most dangerous criminals,

all stuck inside a Refrigeration Factory.

It’s called Air Con

nicolas cage con air cartoon

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Finally when I saw a woman had broken down at

the side of the road I didn’t stop to help her.

I’m not a psychiatrist.

cartoon psychiatrist by Ron Leishman

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Telemarketers!!!

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

 

One of the bane’s of modern existence has to be telemarketers.

It’s a job, I suppose and everybody is entitled to earn a living.

But, like email spam, it is the quantity that gets to people and makes us angry. If we only got a telemarketing call now and again nobody would take umbrage, but getting them three or four times a week, and in some cases three or four times a day, it’s just too much for a body to take.

The cel phone companies used to be the worst offenders. They employed call centers in India or the Philippines or elsewhere, paid them a pittance and gave them a list of cel phone subscribers. And they called and they called and they called.

Maybe you’ve heard of the seven deadly sins or the seven ways to happiness. Well thanks to telemarketers I discovered that there are also seven phases that most people go through when this torture is inflicted upon them.

 

Phase 1 is the polite phase, when you take the call and politely decline their offer (that is, if you haven’t been conned into buying something).

 

Phase 2 is the not so polite phase, when you take the call and not so politely decline their offer.

 

Phase 3 is the beginning to get really irritated phase, when your politeness has all been used up.

 

Phase 4 is the angry phase, where you’ve switched completely from politeness to anger and mildly abusive replies.

 

Phase 5 is the very angry phase, where you shout and question both the intelligence and parentage of the unfortunate telemarketer on the other end of the phone.

 

Phase 6 is the just plain rude phase, this is the one where, if you had a beep machine, it would be working overtime and then some.

 

And finally there is Phase 7 which is the phase where you say nothing at all and just hang up.

 

 

If telemarketers calls are a persistent problem you often find yourself going from Phase 1 to Phase 4 within the same sentence. And occasionally you just answer the phone in Phase 6 mode, which is unfortunate if it’s just your old Auntie Mabel on the other end of the line.

But there is it.

Of course there is another way of doing it as a fellow called Tom Mabe demonstrated. I think his way is much better, certainly funnier. Have a listen – and I apologise profusely about the two idiots cackling and chuckling in the background. They’re almost as irritating as a telemarketing call, but their contribution was beyond my control.

As always, enjoy.