“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”
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Not really a day of plant puns, but it is Pun Day, so you might want to weep anyway.
You know the drill (little gardening pun there).
Enjoy or endure!
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Teacher: If you were a great composer,
where would you live?
Boy: In A Flat.
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I missed today’s Hairdressing Championships,
can anyone tell me if there were any highlights?
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The World Health Organization has
just announced its new slogan.
“WHO cares”.
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My teacher said I was average,
I told him that’s just mean.
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I used to be a gold prospector,
but it didn’t pan out.
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I’ve written my own political manifesto
but I haven’t used one single upper-case letter.
I’m not a capitalist.
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Men with gender issues have it tough in the UK,
I’m sure they’d love to be a broad.
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I wrote some new hymns for the congregation
to sing at my local church and the
Vicar says everybody loves them.
They can’t stop singing my praises.
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I got chatting to a lumberjack in a pub.
He seemed like a decent feller.
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If you want to be a coroner be
prepared for a stiff examination.
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My friend is a real Don Juan with the ladies.
The ladies Don Juan anything to do with him.
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When I was in the army I reckoned all
officers higher up that Colonels are assholes.
But I hate when people Generalize.
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I’ve never seen a flamenco dancer,
but those Spaniards must be clever
to train a bird of that size.
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My wife is trying to wind me up
with jibes about my impotence.
I’m not rising to that.
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I didn’t want to go to the
“I Love The 80s” fancy dress party,
but my friend was adamant.
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fasab 