“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”
.
In case the title didn’t give it away, today is pun day!
Hurrah and enjoy!!
But first a quick medical alert….
.
.
Medical Alert:
When you play golf iron deficiencies
can lead to a risk of increased strokes.
.
.
I woke up this morning and forgot which side the sun rises from.
Then it dawned on me.
.
.
I was devastated when my girlfriend left me for a dwarf.
I never thought she would stoop so low
.
.
“I only have diamonds, clubs and spades,”
said Tom heartlessly
.
.
Ever wonder why the person who invented the door knocker
wasn’t awarded a No-bell prize.
.
.
I walked down a street where the houses were numbered
64K, 128K, 256K, 512K and 1MB.
That was a trip down memory lane.
.
.
If anyone ever says to you that they’ve lost their voice,
They’re lying.
.
.
Tires are fixed for a flat rate.
.
.
If you suffer from kleptomania,
should you take something for it?
.
.
I’ve taken up a part time course in counterfeiting.
I’m forging ahead.
.
.
I broke up with my girlfriend last night.
It happened on the forecourt of a gas station.
Very emotional breakup.
She was in tears and I was filling up….
.
.
The latest market research shows a growing trend
for eating high-fibre cereal for breakfast,
with the result that people are experiencing
greater regularity in their bowel movements.
With trends like that,
who needs enemas?
.
.
Did you hear about the bird that sat on an axe?
It was trying to hatchet
.
.
A boy came into the house with a sofa on his back.
His mother said,
“How many times have I told you not to accept suites from strangers!?”
.
.
I was watching a tv program about the people in Holland who make their traditional clogs?
I thought, I’d like to try that
Wooden shoe?
.
.
A fishing boat is working the North Sea, when suddenly it starts shipping water.
It puts out a Mayday message:
“Help! Help! We are sinking!”
A few minutes back the reply comes through:
“Zis is ze German coastguard. Vot are you sinking about?”
.
.
.
I’ve eaten steak tartar,
but only on rare occasions
.
.
un oeuf is enough as they say in France!
.
.
My laptop is broken.
It just keeps playing “Skyfall” over and over again.
Probably because it’s a Dell.
.
.
================================
.