“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”
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Yes, pun day again. For all of you who love (and hate) puns or word play.
Today we are starting off on the topical subject of employment, but there are plenty of other subjects that get the pun treatment as well.
Enjoy (even if you are pretending not to).
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My first job was working in an orange juice factory,
but I got canned
I just couldn’t concentrate.
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Then I worked in the woods as a lumberjack,
but I just couldn’t hack it,
so they gave me the axe.
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After that I tried to be a tailor,
but I just wasn’t suited for it.
The job was only so-so anyhow.
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Next I tried working in a muffler factory,
but that was exhausting.
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I wanted to be a barber,
but I just couldn’t cut it.
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I attempted to be a deli worker,
but any way I sliced it,
I couldn’t cut the mustard.
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My best job was being a musician,
but eventually I found I wasn’t note worthy.
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I studied a long time to become a doctor,
but I didn’t have any patience.
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Next was a job in a shoe factory;
but it just wasn’t the right fit.
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I became a professional fisherman,
but discovered that I couldn’t live on my net income.
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I thought about becoming a witch,
so I tried that for a spell.
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I managed to get a good job working for a pool maintenance company,
but the work was just too draining.
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After many years of trying to find steady work,
I finally got a job as a historian,
until I realized there was no future in it.
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My last job was working at Starbucks,
but I had to quit,
because it was always the same old grind.
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If you get sick at the airport
you may have a terminal illness.
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Peter won’t fly on virgin airlines
he says he won’t go with anything
that doesn’t go all the way!
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You may be an American outside the bathroom,
but inside, European.
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Do you know any puns about electricity?
About watt?
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A woman asked me for an example of a double entendre
…. so I gave her one….
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Given the style plus the first one, this is a good response.
Hmmm, yes I suppose that’s food for thought 🙂
http://tinyurl.com/2qr8dv
Thank you very much 🙂
You know you just made Erickson’s day with this post.
I don’t think he’s seen it yet 🙂
In my head, there’s a picture of him sitting at a big control panel, with a blinking red light…
LOLOL But where’s the light???
Dunno. It’s HIS panel, and I’m not going anywhere close to his house.
I have NO big, red light on my control panel … er … computer. I would NEVER plot evil! (I believe in outsourcing.)
Whatever you do, NEVER become a cobbler. You’re surrounded by heels and old soles with constantly wagging tongues.
And be careful about carpentry. You always have to be on the level.
And no, ‘Rants, this doesn’t make my day. It DOES, however, brighten it quite a bit! 😀
Thanks, glad you enjoyed them (some other don’t admit it 😉 )
Very punny!
Thank you.
😀 !!!! More please 🙂
Encouragement at last! Thank you so much!!! 🙂
… how many sleeps until punday ?!
Only 7, isn’t it great 😉
Well, that’s between pundays, only to go from now 🙂
I’ll just have to control myself…