“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”
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Neither is Pun Day.
Another selection of wonderful word play for you to….
Enjoy or endure!
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Sometimes pregnancy lasts so long
it seems like a maternity.
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How many nihilists does it take
to sharpen a pencil?
One, but there’s still no point.
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I dropped my barometer earlier.
Just couldn’t handle the pressure.
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What do you call a man
with three balls?
…a juggler.
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Uncle Ben found dead.
No more Mr Rice guy.
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I just invented a joke about helium.
Unfortunately it doesn’t go down well.
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You know that you’re getting old
when your narrow waist swaps
places with your broad mind.
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Apparently a truck carrying boxes of wigs has overturned,
spilling its load across the freeway.
Police are combing the area.
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I saw a woman crying as she
was buying tampons earlier.
Must be going through a
tough period in her life.
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This man was about to throw dough,
cheese and tomatoes at me.
I said, “You wanna pizza me?”
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Looking after my kid is
proving to be expensive.
I’ve just had to buy a baby monitor,
for crying out loud.
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The hospital told me there is a problem
with my son’s blood and he should have
a plasma screen as soon as possible.
They were going to charge me $10,000,
but I managed to buy him a 50″ HDTV
in WalMart for less than a grand.
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Now I hear that the NSA are employing
dwarfs to break into people’s homes
and install listening devices.
The little buggers.
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What happens if you swallow uranium?
You get atomic ache.
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What do you call a Scottish lady who comes round
and decorates your bathroom?
Bonnie Tiler.
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fasab 