Significant Number Factoid Friday – Today The Number Is Fifty 50

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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This week’s significant number is fifty, perhaps one of the most used numbers of them all. Maybe we are so used to having it around that we don’t pay it much attention at all.

Until now.

Enjoy.

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The Number 50

50

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In religion

  • The 50th word of the King James Version of the Bible’s Old Testament, Book of Genesis is “light”;
  • There are 50 chapters in the book of Genesis in the Old Testament;
  • Noah’s Ark was 50 cubits in width. “The length of the ark shall be 300 cubits, the breadth of it 50 cubits, and the height of it 30 cubits.” (Genesis, VI.15);

noahs ark

  • Pentecost in Greek means “50th”;
  • Pentecost is a Jewish summer feast held on the 50th day after the Passover;
  • Pentecost is also called Whitsunday, a Christian feast, which commemorates the Descent of the Holy Ghost upon the Apostles, 50 days after Easter (Resurrection of Christ);
  • 50 is also said to be one of the holiest numbers, being the sum of the squares of the sacred Pythagorean 3-4-5 triangle, i.e., 9 + 16 + 25 = 50;
  • In Kabbalah, there are 50 Gates of Wisdom (or Understanding) and 50 Gates of Impurity;
  • The traditional number of years in a jubilee period.

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In science and technology

  • 50 is the Atomic Number of Tin (Sn) (one of the seven metals of the alchemists).
  • 50 is the fifth magic number in nuclear physics.

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In space

  • Open star cluster Messier 50

Open star cluster Messier 50

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  • 50th Space Wing
  • The 50th Space Wing (50 SW) is a wing of the United States Air Force under the major command of Air Force Space Command (AFSPC). It was activated on 30 January 1992, replacing the 2nd Space Wing, which was inactivated on the same date.
  • The unit is the host wing at Schriever Air Force Base, located east of Colorado Springs, Colorado. Their primary responsibility is to track and maintain the command and control, warning, navigational, and communications satellites for AFSPC. The 50th Space Wing also manages the Global Positioning System.
  • Typical satellite monitoring tasks such as tracking and telemetry are the main part of their mission, and in so doing, they employ more than 5600 personnel (active duty military, guard and reserve, contractors, and DoD civilians.)

50th Space Wing insignia

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In politics

  • Hawaii was the 50th state to enter the union in 1960;
  • There are now 50 stars on the flag of the United States of America, each representing one of the 50 states. The stars are arranged in 9 rows staggered horizontally and 11 rows staggered vertically. Diagonally they are:    1 + 3 + 5 + 7 + 9 + 9 + 7 + 5 + 3 + 1 = 50.

stars and stripes .

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In sport

  • The jersey number 50 has been retired by a number of North American sports teams in honor of past playing greats or other figures.
  • In Major League Baseball: the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim, for coach Jimmie Reese, who served with the team when it was known as the California Angels.
coach Jimmie Reese  California Angels
coach Jimmie Reese California Angels
  • In the NBA: the San Antonio Spurs, for Hall of Famer David Robinson.
San Antonio Spurs Hall of Famer David Robinson
San Antonio Spurs Hall of Famer David Robinson
  • In the NFL: the New York Giants, for Hall of Famer Ken Strong.
New York Giants Hall of Famer Ken Strong
New York Giants Hall of Famer Ken Strong
  • No NHL team has retired the number, which is not frequently issued.
  • Bill Barilko, was a hockey player whose final goal won the Toronto Maple Leafs the Stanley Cup. Four months and 5 days after he scored the winning goal to clinch Toronto’s seventh Stanley Cup, Barilko boarded a Fairchild 24, single-engine plane piloted by his friend Henry Hudson. He was returning home to Timmins from a fishing trip on James Bay. The plane vanished between Rupert House and Timmins. No trace of Hudson, Barilko or the Fairchild was discovered for 11 years, despite massive search efforts. The Maple Leafs were so distraught and unwilling to accept the tragedy that Barilko’s equipment remained in his usual locker room stall at the opening of the 1951 fall training camp. Rumors began circulating that Barilko, of Russian decent, had defected to the Soviet Union to teach his skills to young Soviet players. Finally on June 9, 1962, bush pilot Gary Fields came upon the wreck of a Fairchild 24, approximately 100 kilometers north of Cochrane, Ontario. Barilko was finally laid to rest in Timmins; the year that the Leafs won their first Stanley Cup since his disappearance 11 years earlier.
  • The story of Barilko’s 1951 Stanley Cup heroics and his mysterious disappearance were the inspiration for The Tragically Hip song “Fifty Mission Cap”. The song appeared on the Canadian band’s third full-length album Fully Completely, and is often credited with reintroducing Barilko’s story to a younger generation.

Bill Barilko Toronto Maple Leafs

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In militaria

  • Sukhoi T-50
  • The Sukhoi PAK FA  is a twin-engine jet fighter being developed by Sukhoi for the Russian Air Force. The Sukhoi T-50 is the prototype for PAK FA.
  • The PAK FA is one of only a handful of stealth jet programs globally.

Sukhoi Pak Fa T-50 Fifth-Generation Fighter Jet

  • The PAK FA, a fifth generation jet fighter, is intended to be the successor to the MiG-29 and Su-27 in the Russian inventory and serve as the basis of the Sukhoi/HAL FGFA being developed with India.
  • The T-50 prototype performed its first flight 29 January 2010.
  • By 31 August 2010, it had made 17 flights and by mid-November, 40 in total. The second T-50 was to start its flight test by the end of 2010, but this was delayed until March 2011.
  • The Russian Defence Ministry will purchase the first 10 evaluation example aircraft after 2012 and then 60 production standard aircraft after 2016.
  • The first batch of fighters will be delivered with current technology engines.
  • The PAK-FA is expected to have a service life of about 30–35 years.

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  • T-50 light infantry tank
  • The T-50 light infantry tank was built by the Soviet Union at the beginning of World War II. However it was complicated and expensive, and only a short production run of 69 tanks was completed. Furthermore, even before it was ready for mass-production wartime experience invalidated the underlying concept of light tanks.

T50_parola

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  • MKE T 50
  • The HK33 is a 5.56mm assault rifle developed in the 1960s by West German armament manufacturer Heckler & Koch GmbH (H&K), primarily for export.
  • Capitalizing on the success of their G3 design, the company developed a family of small arms (all using the G3 operating principle and basic design concept) consisting of four types of firearms: the first type, chambered in 7.62x51mm NATO, the second—using the Soviet 7.62x39mm M43 round, third—the intermediate 5.56x45mm caliber and the fourth type—chambered for the 9x19mm Parabellum pistol cartridge.
  • The HK33 series of rifles were adopted by the Brazilian Air Force (Força Aérea Brasileira or FAB), the armed forces of Thailand and Malaysia where they were produced under a license agreement. The rifle was also license-built in France by MAS and in Turkey by MKEK. The HK33 is no longer manufactured or marketed by Heckler & Koch.

MKE-T50.

 

  • M107
  • The M107, with a family of ammunition, enables sniper teams to employ greater destructive force at greater ranges and complements the anti-personnel precision fire capability of the M24 (7.62mm, bolt action) Sniper Weapon System (SWS).
  • The primary mission of this rifle is to engage and defeat materiel targets at extended ranges to include parked aircraft; command, control, communications, computers, and intelligence (C4I) sites; radar sites; ammunition; petroleum, oil and lubricants; and various other thin skinned (lightly armored) materiel targets out to 2000 meters.
  • The M107 can also be used in a counter sniper role taking advantage of the longer stand off range and increased terminal effect when opposing snipers armed with smaller caliber weapons out to 1000 meters.
  • It is a semi-automatic, air-cooled, box magazine-fed rifle chambered for .50 caliber ammunition and with a 10-round removable magazine. This rifle operates by means of the short recoil principle, rather than gas.

M107_1

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  • Browning M2 .50 caliber (12.7mm) Machine Gun
  • The Browning M2 .50 caliber (12.7mm) Machine Gun, is an iconic World War II era automatic, belt-fed, recoil operated, air-cooled, crew-operated machine gun. It is currently fielded by 20 different militaries around the world.
  • The M2 machine gun is crew transportable with limited amounts of ammunition over short distances. The M2 HB machine gun is used to engage dismounted infantry, crew-served weapons, ATGM teams, light-armor vehicles, and aircraft.
  • It fires from the closed-bolt position and is belt fed, recoil operated, air cooled, and crew operated. By repositioning some of the component parts, ammunition may be fed from either the left or right side. A disintegrating metallic link-belt is used to feed the ammunition into the weapon. The gun is capable of single-shot (ground M2), as well as automatic fire.  The AN/TVS-5 night-vision sight can be used with the M2 machine gun.

Browning 50 caliber M2 M2HB

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  • Howdah Hunter
  • During the first British colony government period in India, starting from 1840, the Howdah pistols were preferred by the army officers detached in the widest territories of the Empire.
  • It is a classic large caliber double barrel pistol in the English gunsmith school style, used at close range to stop tigers which commonly leaped upon elephants carrying hunters in a Howdah in the far away colonial territories.
  • It is normally finished with blued barrels, engraved locks featuring wide animals in their natural habitat, and case hardened color finish. The walnut pistol grip stock is checkered and finished with a steel butt cap. Barrel Length 11 1/4″. Weight 4.41 lbs. (20 ga), 5.07 lbs. (.50)

Howdah 50cal

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  • Desert Eagle
  • Although an American idea, the “Desert Eagle” was developed in Israel by the IMI (Israel Military Industries) in the early 1980s. The first Desert Eagles were manufactured in Israel and started appearing on gun dealers’ shelves in the US around 1985. Following a problem in meeting demand for the pistols in 1992 (and probably fearful of the prospect of government import limitations), Magnum Research started assembling parts of the gun in the US and currently is working toward full assembly and possibly manufacture of the guns stateside.
  • Given the fact that the IMI is best known for the Uzi series of submachine guns and the Galil rifles, it isn’t surprising that the Desert Eagle departs radically from many other semi auto pistol designs, though the exterior belays this. The basic layout is like that of most other modern semi auto pistols (with the magazine release on the side of the grip, slide release on the left side of the frame, and a thumb-activated slide safety).
  • Internally it is different. The pistol is gas-operated with a system that is more like a rifle than the delayed blow-back systems used with most other semi auto hand guns. The gas system employs a fixed, shrouded barrel which stays in position on the frame during firing, with gas coming up a port just ahead of the chamber to operate a three-lug rotating bolt that rides in the slide assembly. The fixed barrel gives the gun a lot of potential accuracy, a potential realized with most of these pistols when fired with quality ammunition.
  • In addition to .357 Magnum, .41 AE, .41 Magnum, and .44 Magnum chamberings, the Desert Eagle is also available chambered for the .50 AE (Action Express).

50 cal Desert Eagle

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  • The Smith & Wesson 50 calibre Revolver
  • Billed by Smith & Wesson as the most Powerful Production Revolver in the World Today, this S&W revolve uses the massive .500 S&W Magnum® Cartridge with 2600 ft/lb. Muzzle Energy.
  • It is designed as a hunting handgun for any game animal walking.

Smith& Wesson magnum_50cal

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In books, tv, movies and music

  • The TV show Hawaii Five-O and its reimagined version, Hawaii Five-0, are so called because Hawaii is the last (50th) of the states to officially become a state.

Hawaii Five-0 Then And Now

  • From the tv show, the term 5-O (Five-Oh) has become slang for police officers and/or a warning that police are approaching. Derived from the television show Hawaii Five-O
  • 50 First Dates. A Groundhog Day type of movie starring Adam Sandler as Henry Roth, a man afraid of commitment up until he meets the beautiful Lucy. They hit it off and Henry think he’s finally found the girl of his dreams, until he discovers she has short-term memory loss and forgets him the very next day.
  • 50/50. Inspired by a true story, a comedy centered on a 27-year-old guy who learns of his cancer diagnosis, and his subsequent struggle to beat the disease.
  • Fifty shades of grey, the mummy-porn novel that became a huge seller in 2012
  • Nickname of famous hip hop / rap legend 50 Cent.
  • Paul Simon 50 ways to leave your lover
  • 50 Ways To Say Goodbye by Train
  • Train frontman Pat Monahan penned this song with Espionage, the Norwegian production duo that helped pen “Hey Soul Sister.”
  • Espionage is made up of Espen Lind and Amund Bjørklund and amongst their other credits are Beyoncé’s “Irreplaceable” and Chris Brown’s “With You.”
  • The song follows a similar theme to Paul Simon’s “50 Ways To Leave Your Lover,” though in this instance it’s the narrator’s pride that has been hurt as he looks for excuses to tell his friends why she’s disappeared from his life.
  • 50 Words For Snow Kate Bush
  • 50 Words For Snow comprises seven songs “set against a background of falling snow.” The album was released through the singer’s personal imprint, Fish People.
  • Speaking to American radio station KCRW, Bush said that the idea for this song came from thinking about the myth that the Inuit Eskimos have 50 words for snow. She then decided to make up increasingly fantastical words herself, and recruited actor and writer Stephen Fry to recite the 50 synonyms. They include such words/phrases as “spangladasha,” “mountain-sob, “blown from Polar fur,” and “shimmer-glisten.”
  • Whilst the Inuit did have about as many words for snow as the English (and now a lot less after Bush’s verbal creations for the frozen precipitation), the Sami in Finland have in excess of 50.

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In other stuff

  • Cities located on latitude 50 degrees north include Cologne and Frankfurt, Germany; Brussels, Belgium; Maastricht, Netherlands; Portsmouth, Exeter, Plymouth and Brighton & Hove, England; Regina, Saskatchewan, and Kamloops, British Columbia, Canada; Kiev, Ukraine; Prague, Czech Republic; Kraków, Poland; and Kharkov, Ukraine.
  • Cities located on longitude 50 degrees west include Assis, São Paulo, Brazil.
  • Cities located on longitude 50 degrees east include Dammam, Saudi Arabia; Samara, Russia; and Manama, Bahrain.
  • The percentage (50%) equivalent to one half, so that the phrase “fifty-fifty” commonly expresses something divided equally in two; in business this is often denoted as being the ultimate in equal partnership.
  • In millimeters, the focal length of the normal lens in 35 mm photography.
  • Gold wedding anniversary celebrates 50 years of marriage.
  • The Roman numeral for 50 is L.
  • A Canadian brand of beer called 50 Ale created in 1950 by Labatt breweries to commemorate 50 years of partnership. It is a popular brand still sold today.
  • The speed limit, in kilometers per hour, of Australian roads with unspecified limits.
  • Jason and 50 Argonauts sailed on the ship Argo on a quest for the Golden Fleece in Colchis (Black Sea).
  • Tineke Hybrid Tea Rose has 50 double broad petals.

Tineke Hybrid Tea Rose.

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CLASSIFIED: For Your Eyes Only, Part Ten!!!!!!!!!!

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Saturday, and time for another selection of the ever popular Classified Ads.

These attempts to sell goods and services didn’t quite reach the standard required to be themselves classified as intelligent communication.

They are funny though and thank goodness for that.

Enjoy!

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classified ad 216.

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drive through colon screening.

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classified ad 217.

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robotic prostrate surgery.

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classified ad 218.

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rectal rocket.

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classified ad 219.

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French and Fry.

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classified ad 220.

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device to cure sleepiness.

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classified ad 221

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Consultations.

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classified ad 222

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breast augmentation

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CLASSIFIED: For Your Eyes Only, Part Nine!!!!!!!!!

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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The year may have changed since the last bunch of Classified ads, but the stupidity continues as you can see from today’s selection.

I hope you find something in here to make you smile this first weekend of 2013.

Enjoy.

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classified ad 201

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classified ad 202

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classified ad 203

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classified ad 204

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classified ad 205

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classified ad 207

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classified ad 208.

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classified ad 210.

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classified ad 211.

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classified ad 212.

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classified ad 213.

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classified ad 214.

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CLASSIFIED: For Your Eyes Only, Part Eight!!!!!!!!

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Part eight of the series on classified ads written by the intellectually challenged.

They probably thought what they said was smart. In fact they probably thought that what they said was what they said, only when you read what they said, they said something they didn’t mean to say. If you see what I mean. You soon will.

Enjoy!

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classified ad 115

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classified ad 110

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classified ad 108

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classified ad 106

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classified ad 104

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classified ad 102

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classified ad 100

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classified ad 99

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classified ad 98

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classified ad 97.

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classified ad 96.

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classified ad 95.

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classified ad 88

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classified ad 87.

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classified ad 86.

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classified ad 93

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classified ad 92.

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classified ad 91.

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classified ad 90

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classified ad 85.

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A Question Of Lies And Gross Indecency, But Just Who Is Responsible?

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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The election is looming. Just about a month to go in fact.

Despite his numerous gaffs, after the first televised debate Romney has pulled slightly ahead in the polls and according to news reports, is “hardening his lead”, mainly on the back of a lackluster performance by Obama.

The VP debate last week didn’t produce a clear leader either – just created a frenzy among viewers to find out who was under the desk tickling Biden’s feet.

Last evening’s bout at Hofstra University, in Hempstead, New York didn’t produce a clear winner for me either, although some media polls put Obama ahead. His performance was certainly way better than in debate one, but you could easily have written the totally predictable moron media’s “Obama fights back” headlines without even watching it.

What this all means is that it’s still all to play for and far too close to call. In the end the committed supporters on each side will largely cancel each other out and the king-makers (or president-makers in this case) will be the 5 to 10 percent so far undecided.

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Does it really matter who wins? After all, when it’s all done and dusted, the same types of people will hold the same offices as before. They will do the same things as before. And the mess we are all in will be as big as before – or bigger. I hope you have noticed that there has been a distinct failure by BOTH candidates to address the economic crisis in any meaningful and specific terms.  

But there are two other questions we need to address.

First, there is an obscenity here that no one is talking very much about. Call it the elephant and the donkey in the room if you like. It is an obscenity that has been around for far too long, but today in our current dire economic circumstances, it has been elevated to the level of gross indecency.

What am I ranting on about this time?

political money badge

 

Well, if you hadn’t guessed already, the obscenity I am referring to is the scandalous amount of money that BOTH presidential candidates are wasting trying to get themselves elected.

We all know Romney is a multi-millionaire, with equally rich chums or better, so it maybe isn’t such a surprise that he is able to raise hundreds of millions of dollars for his campaign war chest.

What is more surprising is Obama. His war chest is actually bigger than Romney’s and, quite unbelievably, is about to hit and probably surpass the $1 billion mark. It may already have by the time you read this.

Obama war chest

 

I know a billion dollars isn’t what it used to be in terms of purchasing power, but it can still buy a lot of stuff. If you are having any difficulty visualizing how much a billion dollars is, think of it this way. The median income in the United States is around $29,000, meaning half the wage earners  make less and half make more. If you make $29,000 a year, and don’t spend a single penny of it, it will still take you 34,482 years to save a billion dollars.

One Billion Dollars
One Billion Dollars

 

Now you are probably having trouble visualizing what it would be like to wait 34,482 years – if you are, it’s over 400 lifetimes!

Put another way, their combined waste of money could provide almost 150,000 surgical procedures, or more than 500 million meals for the poor and homeless, either of them money a lot better spent.

homeless in winter
homeless in winter

 

That anyone, Obama, Romney or A. N. Other can squander this amount of money for no return other than to aggrandize themselves with the title of President shows a deal of contempt for the ordinary people of the country, particularly those who are presently struggling to survive thanks to the financial mismanagement that these same politicians have presided over.

You can be sure that whoever gets into the big seat in the White House he will drown us in hypocrisy. We will get lectures about sacrifice and austerity measures, how deficits need to be cut, how taxes need to be raised, how you will have to tighten your belt for the sake of the country (whether you can still afford a belt or not) and so forth. Where was the belt tightening during the election campaign, boyz???

Rat Cartoon

 

Of course, we are told that the bulk of the money in the politicians’ war chests is made up of the small $5, $10, $25 or $50 donated by ordinary folks. That may be true. But there are two types of dollars donated for election campaigns – ‘gifted’ dollars and ‘investment’ dollars. Most of the dollars donated by big corporations, super rich individuals and bankers fall into the latter category. Those people will be expecting, and will get, a return on that ‘investment’.

political graft

Thus the system – which is now so corrupt that rich executives ride roughshod over the law at will, and without fear of being punished no matter who is president – will remain largely as is.

This is a recipe for disaster. If history has taught us nothing else, it has taught us that a nation, caught between a broken political system and a populist movement of those who feel increasingly disenfranchised and undervalued, will at some stage experience rebellion against that corruption.

If you think not, think again. In fact, think tea parties in Boston and how and why the United States came into being in the first place.

Boston tea party cartoon

 

Of course the solution to this particular obscenity is quick and easy. Put a ceiling on the amount of money a politician can legally collect and spend on his campaign. That would create a level playing field for all. Rich or poor, large party or small party, would have an equal chance of marketing their wears.

The only problem is that it is the same politicians who will have to make that law, and last reports still say that turkeys are very reluctant to vote for Thanksgiving and Christmas.

Thanksgiving Turkey eat beef campaign

 

So that gets us to the second question in the title of this post, namely “Who is responsible?” In fact it is a two-fold question.

Are the politicians responsible because they lie to the people and promise one thing before an election and do another afterwards?

Or are the people responsible because they know fine well that the politicians are lying to them and won’t deliver on their promises, but still go out and vote for them anyway?

Let’s phrase these two questions another way.

Are the politicians responsible because they know that if they did not lie, not enough people would vote for them?

Or are the people responsible because they don’t really want to hear the hard truth and would not vote for a politician who told it how it is?

 

Everyone has to answer that dilemma themselves. Personally I wouldn’t vote for someone I know is lying to me, no matter what party they belonged to.

 

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A Tribute To Peanut Butter, Yum! – Oh, And A Lot Of Things You Probably Didn’t Know About Peanuts

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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I must admit to not having much time for nuts with allergies, er… to nuts. But I’ve always liked the edible variety, particularly peanuts and peanut butter. Liked it when I was a kid, still like it today. One of the best culinary inventions ever, in my opinion.

Mr Peanut - Planters logo
Mr Peanut – Planters logo

 

Peanut butter has been invented and reinvented many times during history. Peanuts were known as early as 950 B.C. and originated in South America. The ancient Incas used peanuts and were known to have made it into a paste-like substance.

As a crop, peanuts emigrated from South America to Africa thanks to early explorers and from there traveled by trade into Spain which then traded the product to the American colonies. A rather roundabout way to get to the US, but there you are, or rather, here it is.

The first commercial peanut crop was grown in Virginia in the early to mid 1840’s and in North Carolina beginning around 1818.

According to the Corn Products Company, Dr. Ambrose Straub of St. Louis patented a peanut butter-making machine in 1903 and some unknown doctor invented peanut butter in 1890.

Dr. John Harvey Kellogg patented a “Process of Preparing Nut Meal” in 1895 and used peanuts. Kellogg served the patients at his Battle Creek Sanitarium peanut butter. Joseph Lambert worked for Dr. Kellogg and began selling his own hand-operated peanut butter grinder in 1896. Almeeta Lambert published the first nut cookbook, “The Complete Guide to Nut Cookery” in 1899.

By 1914, many companies were making peanut butter.

Joseph L. Rosenfield invented a churning process that made peanut butter smooth and in 1928, licensed his invention to the Pond Company, the makers of “Peter Pan” peanut butter.

Peter Pan peanut butter

In 1932, he began making his own brand of peanut butter called “Skippy” which included a crunchy style peanut butter.

Skippy Peanut Butter

But it is possibly agricultural chemist, George Washington Carver who has the best claim to the peanut butter gold medal position. In the course of his research he discovered three hundred uses for peanuts and hundreds more uses for soybeans, pecans and sweet potatoes.

Carver wanted poor farmers to grow alternative crops both as a source of their own food and as a source of other products to improve their quality of life.

He started popularizing uses for peanut products including peanut butter, paper, ink, and oils beginning in 1880, the most popular of his 44 practical bulletins for farmers contained 105 food recipes using peanuts.

However, Carver did not patent peanut butter as he believed food products were all gifts from God. The 1880 date precedes all the above inventors except of course for the Incas, who were first. It was Carver who made peanuts a significant crop in the American South in the early 1900’s. Today half of all edible peanuts produced in the United States are used to make peanut butter and peanut spreads.

Thanks Mr G W Carver.

George Washington Carver - One Of America's Great Sscientists
George Washington Carver – One Of America’s Great Scientists

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And here are a lot of other things you probably didn’t know about peanuts….

 

  • Peanuts are one of the ingredients of dynamite;
  • The peanut is not a nut, it is actually a legume;
  • It takes more than 500 peanuts to make one 12 ounce jar of peanut butter;
  • The Planters Peanut Company mascot, Mr. Peanut, was created during a contest for schoolchildren in 1916;
  • Throughout the South, peanuts were known as “Monkey Nuts,” and “Goober peas,” before the civil war;
  • The fear of peanut butter sticking to the roof of the mouth is called Arachibutyrophobia;
  • People living on the east coast prefer creamy peanut butter, while people living on the west coast prefer chunky peanut butter;
  • Skippy Peanut Butter is sold more in the world than any other peanut butter;
  • The average American kid will eat approximately 1.500 peanut butter sandwiches by high school graduation;
  • The #1 peanut producing state is Georgia;
  • On average, the American household consumes six pounds of peanut butter annually;
  • 96% of people put the peanut butter on first when making a peanut butter and jelly sandwich;
  • Americans consume the most peanut butter in the world;
  • Approximately three jars of peanut butter are sold every second;
  • In a year, about 90 million jars of Skippy Peanut Butter are sold. (This works out to three jars sold every second);
  • In the U.S. peanuts account for 66% of all snack nuts;
  • Both Thomas Jefferson and Jimmy Carter, U.S. presidents, were peanut farmers at one time;
  • Peanut butter is an effective way to remove chewing gum from hair or clothes;
  • Incas used to create pots in the shape of peanuts that were highly prized;
  • In Greene, New York, you are not allowed to eat peanuts and walk backwards on the sidewalk during a concert.

 

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Twenty-Four Thoughts To Get You Through Any Crisis

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Some situations in life or business or whatever call for a bit of creative thinking. “Thinking outside the box” is the trendy phrase that’s used. It means sometimes forgetting a lot of what we have learned or applying it a little differently.

If you ever find yourself in that kind of position some of these thoughts may help.

Enjoy.

 

 

Indecision is the key to flexibility.

 

You cannot tell which way the train went by looking at the track.

 

There is absolutely no substitute for a genuine lack of preparation.

 

Happiness is merely the remission of pain.

 

Nostalgia isn’t what it used to be.

 

Sometimes too much drink is not enough.

 

The facts, although interesting, are irrelevant.

 

The careful application of terror is also a form of communication.

 

Someone who thinks logically is a nice contrast to the real world.

 

Things are more like they are today than they ever have been before.

 

Anything worth fighting for is worth fighting dirty for.

 

Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler.

 

Friends may come and go, but enemies accumulate.

 

I have seen the truth and it makes no sense.

 

All things being equal, fat people use more soap.

 

If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.

 

One-seventh of you life is spent on Wednesday.

 

By the time you can make ends meet, they move the ends.

 

Not one shred of evidence supports the notion that life is serious.

 

The more you run over a dead cat, the flatter it gets.

 

There is always one more imbecile than you counted on.

 

This is as bad as it can get, but don’t bet on it.

 

Never wrestle with a pig:  You both get all dirty, and the pig likes it.

 

The trouble with life is, you’re halfway through it before you realize it’s a ‘do it yourself’ thing.

 

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You Only Get the Right Answers If You Ask the Right Questions

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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It’s Tuesday and we have another selection of those questions that are worth asking, but hardly anyone asks. Should we just accept thing the way they are, or should we start to question what is happening around us a little more?

Here we go. Enjoy!

 

 

You know the expression, ‘Don’t quit your day job?’

Well what do you say to people that work nights?

 

 

Why is the ‘0’ on a phone after the ‘1’ and not before the ‘1’?

 

 

If the president were gay, would his husband be the first man?

 

 

If you were a genie and a person asked you this wish, ‘I wish you would not grant me this wish’ what would you do?

 

 

Did Noah have woodpeckers on the ark? If he did, where did he keep them?

 

 

Why doesn’t the armpit hair have split ends?

 

 

Do pyromaniacs like to wear blazers?

 

 

If you don’t pay your exorcist, do you get repossessed?

 

 

Why is something funny called a ‘knee-slapper’ when you actually slap your thigh?

 

 

Why do we teach kids that violence is not the answer and then in school have them read about wars that solved problems?

 

 

If money doesn’t grow on trees then why do banks have branches?”

 

 

Why does someone believe you when you say something like, “There are four billion stars,” but check when you say the paint is wet?

 

 

What would happen if Batman got bitten by a vampire?

 

 

Why can’t we spell creativity however we want?

 

 

Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?”

 

 

Has your mate ever called you at work to ask where the remote control is?

 

 

Was the person who invented the Express Lane at the grocery store ever properly thanked?

 

 

Why do you seldom if ever see ads for advertising companies?

 

 

Why is it that when things get wet they get darker, even though water is clear?

 

 

Why doesn’t McDonald’s sell hotdogs?

 

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Donkey Hokey

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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No, I’m not tilting at windmills, not just yet anyhow. And despite the play on words in the title, nor am I referring to Cervantes character Don Quixote. This post actually does concern a donkey, though. In fact animals in general.

It is a little known fact that donkeys kill more people than plane crashes. And at the end of August I read about a small town Texas mayor who was killed in an attack by his own donkey. He was Bill Bohlke and he was Mayor of Hollywood Park in Atascosa County, Texas.

That unfortunate event set me thinking of a number of things.

First I asked myself how the heck you pronounced his surname.

Then I wondered if Mayor Bohlke was a Republican or Democrat and how macabre it would have been if the donkey had done away with his elephant man rival.

And then I thought about the amazing and different ways people find to leave the mortal coil. I bet, like most of us, the last thing Mayor Bohlke thought was that some day he would meet his end from an attack from a randy donkey!

And then I marveled at how so many people, for no logical reason, have a romantic fantasy notion that animals are not inherently dangerous. They are.

And this is true for people who work with them every day and should know better.

For example, when I was growing up I would spend time at my uncle’s farm. He had a herd of one hundred or more dairy cows and every evening when I was there my cousin and myself would be sent out to the fields to bring the cows in for milking.

We had a couple of great little collie dogs to help us, not that much help was needed because the cows had a routine and once they heard us calling for them they made their way to the field gate and up the lane to the milking parlor, glad no doubt that they were about to be relieved of their burden once more.

With them came the bull. A huge brute of an animal and unbelievably strong. But he was docile enough, walked up with his herd of ‘wives’ and while they made their way into the queue for the milking machines he would usually lie down in the hayshed and munch on some of the hay.

As innocent (dumb) kids we would sometimes sit down beside him, even using him as a prop to lean against. He didn’t seem to mind a bit, we thought he was glad of the company perhaps.

Then one day as the herd was being ushered back out to the fields Mr Bull totally out of the blue decided he would like to kill my uncle.

Luckily us kids had our chore done in bringing the herd in to get milked. When the time came to take them back out again we were engaged on other vital business, I can’t remember exactly what but I’m sure it involved football, playing cowboys and Indians, fending off some galactic foe who was attacking earth that day, or some such vital stuff. But we could hear the commotion in the distance.

Furious about something, only he knew what, the bull roared angrily and ran towards my uncle who had been leading the way. With his head lowered he hit my uncle between his lower back and his knees and threw him up into the air like a rag doll – and my uncle was a BIG man. Very fortunately the bull tossed him into the air with such force that he went clean over the raised fence and hedge on the right hand side of the lane and ended up in one of the fields. 

The crazy bull then tried to go after him but couldn’t get up the steep embankment on which the fence had been constructed. Another cousin, quite a bit older than us, saw the attack. He was in a tractor and he immediately had the presence of mind to use that to take the bull’s attention away from my uncle. The distraction seemed to work, because as suddenly as it had started it was over and things were back to normal.

But my uncle had learned a valuable lesson. Animals can be dangerous.

So had I, even though I wasn’t there at the time, but from then on I haven’t been a fan of bulls – not in Chicago or Wall Street either come to think of it.

Unfortunately Mayor Bohlke wasn’t so lucky with his donkey.

I wonder if it happened something like this???

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Some More Witty Sayings, Inspired By George Carlin

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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There was a lot of love for the short series of quotes from George Carlin. I was pleased that he is remembered well and still giving amusement to people, despite no longer being with us.

Today I have a selection of other witty sayings, not attributed to anyone in particular, but in the same spirit as last week’s post.

I hope you enjoy these too.

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Dickson’s Gardening Rule: When weeding, the best way to make sure you are removing a weed and not a valuable plant is to pull on it. If it comes out of the ground easily, it is a valuable plant.

 

The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement.

 

Sex is like air; it’s not important unless you aren’t getting any.

 

Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.

 

One good turn gets most of the blankets.

 

There are two kinds of pedestrians — the quick and the dead.

 

Life is sexually transmitted.

 

An unbreakable toy is useful for breaking other toys.

 

If quitters never win, and winners never quit, then who is the fool who said “Quit while you’re ahead”?

 

ASCII stupid question, get a stupid ANSI. (One for the nerds and geeks to LTAO.) 

 

Willie was a Chemist, But Willie is no more, What Willie thought was H2O Was H2SO4.

 

A closed mouth gathers no feet.

 

Health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

 

It’s not hard to meet expenses, they’re everywhere.

 

Jury — Twelve people who determine which client has the better lawyer.

 

Never lick a gift horse in the mouth.

 

The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.

 

Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.

 

Before marriage, a man yearns for the woman he loves. After marriage, the ‘Y’ becomes silent.

 

If you want your spouse to listen and pay strict attention to every word you say, talk in your sleep.

 

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