Can You Handle The Quiz?

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Hi and welcome to another week.

Today’s quiz has a few questions that I think you will find quite challenging, plus one or two that you should breeze through with ease.

But the only way to find out is to have a go.

And remember, as always, if you get stuck, you can find the answers waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay down below, but please NO cheating!

Enjoy and good luck.

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Quiz 07

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Q.  1:  What goes up and down, but still remains in the same place?

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Q.  2:  Who directed both JFK and Nixon?

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Q.  3:  Before being harvested and sold, an individual cranberry must bounce at least how many inches high to make sure they aren’t too ripe?

           a)  2 inches            b)  3 inches            c)  4 inches            d)  5 inches

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Q.  4:  What World War II British naval intelligence officer wrote the children’s story ‘Chitty-Chitty-Bang-Bang’?

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Q.  5:  Who is the only US President who was never elected as either President or Vice President?

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Q.  6:  The ‘H-3’ and the ‘H-4’, built in 1757 and 1759 were mechanical wonders.  Who constructed them both and what were they used for?  (A point for each correct answer and a bonus point if you get them both correct.)

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Q.  7:  What does the term ‘Cornucopia’ mean?

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Q.  8:  To nearest 1000, in the year 1800 how many wild turkeys were there in Turkey?

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Q.  9:  The two oldest universities in Europe are both found in which country?  

           a) France              b) England              c) Italy              d) Greece

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Q. 10:  Who was the tallest President of the United States and who was the shortest? (A point for each correct answer and a bonus point if you get them both correct.)

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Q. 11:  In which 1949 movie did Sir Alec Guinness famously play the role of eight different members of the D’Ascoyne family?

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Q. 12:  Who won this year’s (2014) Formula One World Driver’s Championship and what was his nationality? (A point for each correct answer and a bonus point if you get them both correct.)

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Q. 13:  ‘Fionn mac Cumhaill’, ‘Bergrisar’, ‘Daityas’, ‘Patagons’ and ‘Nephilims’ are all examples of what?

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Q. 14:  What does ‘IMAX’, as in the large screen IMAX Cinemas stand for?

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Q. 15:  Which boxer’s first professional fight was against Tunney Hunsaker, Police Chief of Fayetteville, West Virginia, on October 29, 1960?

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Q. 16:  Which Portuguese-born navigator was the first European to cross the Pacific Ocean?

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Q. 17:  Who was the first Twitter user to reach 20 million followers?

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Q. 18:  Which martial art takes its name from the Japanese for ‘way of the sword’?

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Q. 19:  What color is ‘Absynth’?

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Q. 20:  Which popular singer and movie star had a ‘secret love’ in 1954 and in which famous movie did it feature? (A point for each correct answer and a bonus point if you get them both correct.)

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ANSWERS

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Q.  1:  What goes up and down, but still remains in the same place?

A.  1:  Stairs!

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Q.  2:  Who directed both JFK and Nixon?

A.  2:  Oliver Stone.

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Q.  3:  Before being harvested and sold, an individual cranberry must bounce at least how many inches high to make sure they aren’t too ripe?

           a)  2 inches            b)  3 inches            c)  4 inches            d)  5 inches

A.  3:  The correct answer is c)  4 inches.

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Q.  4:  What World War II British naval intelligence officer wrote the children’s story ‘Chitty-Chitty-Bang-Bang’?

A.  4:  Ian Fleming, much better known as author of the James Bond novels.

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Q.  5:  Who is the only US President who was never elected as either President or Vice President?

A.  5:  Gerald R Ford, who became the 40th Vice-President when Spiro Agnew resigned the position and who subsequently became the 38th President of the USA, when he took over the job after Richard M Nixon resigned.

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Q.  6:  The ‘H-3’ and the ‘H-4’, built in 1757 and 1759 were mechanical wonders.  Who constructed them both and what were they used for?  (A point for each correct answer and a bonus point if you get them both correct.)

A.  6:  John Harrison.   H-3 and H-4 were the first successful maritime chronometers.

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Q.  7:  What does the term ‘Cornucopia’ mean?

A.  7:  Literally ‘Horn of Plenty’, used as a symbol of abundance.

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Q.  8:  To nearest 1000, in the year 1800 how many wild turkeys were there in Turkey?

A.  8:  The correct answer is ‘None’, the wild turkey it is a native North American bird.

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Q.  9:  The two oldest universities in Europe are both found in which country?  

           a) France              b) England              c) Italy              d) Greece

A.  9:  Many people think it is England with the famous Oxford and Cambridge Universities, but the correct answer is  c) Italy.  Parma (1065 AD) and Bologna (1119 AD)

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Q. 10:  Who was the tallest President of the United States and who was the shortest? (A point for each correct answer and a bonus point if you get them both correct.)

A. 10:  Abraham Lincoln was the tallest at 6′ 4″, and James Madison was the shortest at 5′ 4″.

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Q. 11:  In which 1949 movie did Sir Alec Guinness famously play the role of eight different members of the D’Ascoyne family?

A. 11:  Kind Hearts and Coronets.

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Q. 12:  Who won this year’s (2014) Formula One World Driver’s Championship and what was his nationality? (A point for each correct answer and a bonus point if you get them both correct.)

A. 12:  Lewis Hamilton who is British.

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Q. 13:  ‘Fionn mac Cumhaill’, ‘Bergrisar’, ‘Daityas’, ‘Patagons’ and ‘Nephilims’ are all examples of what?

A. 13:  Giants.

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Q. 14:  What does ‘IMAX’, as in the large screen IMAX Cinemas stand for?

A. 14:  IMAX stands for ‘Image Maximum’.

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Q. 15:  Which boxer’s first professional fight was against Tunney Hunsaker, Police Chief of Fayetteville, West Virginia, on October 29, 1960?

A. 15:  Cassius Clay. (Sorry, but you do not score a point if you only said ‘Muhammad Ali’, he did not change his name until 15 years later after converting to Sunni Islam in 1975.)

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Q. 16:  Which Portuguese-born navigator was the first European to cross the Pacific Ocean?

A. 16:  Ferdinand Magellan (1480 – 1521).

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Q. 17:  Who was the first Twitter user to reach 20 million followers?

A. 17:  Lady Gaga.

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Q. 18:  Which martial art takes its name from the Japanese for ‘way of the sword’?

A. 18:  Kendo.

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Q. 19:  What color is ‘Absynth’?

A. 19:  Green.

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Q. 20:  Which popular singer and movie star had a ‘secret love’ in 1954 and in which famous movie did it feature? (A point for each correct answer and a bonus point if you get them both correct.)

A. 20:  Doris Day and the movie was Calamity Jane.

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Did You Know? – More Interesting Facts.

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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More interesting facts today.

Hats definitely off to James Harrison, but my favorite is Bill Morgan.

Enjoy.

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did you know4

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We’ll start with one in honor of the recently passed St Patrick’s Day.

St Patrick’s given name was Maewyn Succat.

After becoming a priest, he changed his name to Patricius,

from the Latin term meaning “father figure.”

st patrick

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Esperanto is an artificial language,

but is spoken by about 500,000 to 2,000,000 people,

and 2 feature films have been done in the language.

basic_esperanto_words_by_moosader

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After the bible,

the most translated book in the world is

Pinocchio.

pinocchio book cover

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Hall of fame boxer Sugar Ray Robinson backed out of a fight

because he had a dream that he was going to kill his opponent in the ring.

After a priest and minister convinced him to fight, Robinson went into the ring

and killed his opponent Jimmy Doyle.

Sugar Ray Robinson and Jimmy Doyle

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The German word for birth control pill is ‘antibabypille’

and in Switzerland they have pregnancy tests

called ‘MaybeBaby’ in vending machines.

birth control

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After 9/11, 1600 people died in automobile accidents

after they switched travel plans from flying to driving.

automobile-accident

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If officials awarded Lance Armstrong’s Tour de France title

to the next fastest finisher who has never been linked to doping,

they would have to give it to the person who finished 23rd.

tour de france

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When US Army officer Braxton Bragg held both the job of

the company commander and the post’s quartermaster,

he made a request to the quartermaster (that is, himself)

and when he received the request as quartermaster he denied it.

He continued to argue back and forth with himself through letters.

braxton_bragg_2_400_pxlw

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In 2010 workers at Ground Zero found an 18th century wooden ship

underneath the World Trade Center rubble.

ship-hull-found-in-ground-zero-rubble

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When child actor Jackie Coogan turned 18,

he found out all his money, $68 million,

had been spent by his mother, who argued

“No promises were ever made to give Jackie anything.

Every dollar a kid earns before he is 21 belongs to his parents.” 

Coogan’s Bill was then passed to protect child actors.

Jackie_Coogan,_The_Kid_(1921)

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In Samoa, it’s a crime to forget your own wife’s birthday.

(Isn’t that true for most places?)

wife's birthday

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Ryan Gosling was cast as Noah in The Notebook

because the director wanted someone “not handsome.”

ryan gosling noah

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After needing 13 liters of blood for a surgery at the age of 13,

a man named James Harrison, aka “The Man With The Golden Arm”,

pledged to donate blood once he turned 18.

It was discovered that his blood contained a rare antigen

which cured Rhesus disease.

He has donated blood a record 1000 times

and saved 2,000,000 lives.

james-harrison donating blood

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In 1942 in Mississippi there was a man known as the Phantom Barber

who would break into peoples’ houses at night and cut their hair.

The Phantom Barber Of Mississippi

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In 1999 an Australian man, named Bill Morgan

was declared dead for 14 minutes after an allergic reaction to drugs

given to him in hospital after a car accident.

To celebrate his survival he bought a scratch card

and won a $27,000 car.

A news team covering the story asked him to re-enact

the scratch card moment for their story,

so he went into the shop, bought another scratch card,

and won  $250,000 jackpot.

Here he is….

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Quizzers, Your Moment Has Come!

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Hello to all you quizzers out there. Your moment has indeed come.

It’s time for the Monday quiz here at the fasab blog.

Another random selection of questions and as usual if you get stuck you can find the answers waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay down below, but please NO cheating!

Enjoy, and good luck.

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quiz 09

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Q.  1:  What is the longest river in South America?

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Q.  2:  Philip Pirrip is the central character in which famous Charles Dickens novel?

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Q.  3:  ‘Firefly’, ‘The Mole’ and ‘Fab 2’ are all examples of what?

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Q.  4:  This famous historical duke and his horse both had capital cities named after them. Can you name them? (A point for each correct answer.)

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Q.  5:  The island of Zealand is part of which country?

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Q.  6:  What is the name of the satirical novel by the American author Joseph Heller set during World War II from 1942 to 1944?

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Q.  7:  What is the name of the Norwegian politician who became a puppet leader of his country during World War II, his name now a byword for treachery?

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Q.  8:  This 1999 movie starring Will Smith, who also sang the title song, won five Golden Raspberry Awards for Worst Picture, Worst Director, Worst Screen Couple, Worst Screenplay and Worst Original Song – what was it?

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Q.  9:  Which island has the 2 official languages Sinhalese and Tamil?

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Q. 10:  The site of this famous battle is now a National Monument, but in which American state did the Battle of The Little Bighorn take place?

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Q. 11:  In order of popularity, can you name the world’s top three religions?

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Q. 12:  Which South American city provides the setting for the 1982 movie ‘Missing’, starring Jack Lemmon?

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Q. 13:  British Honduras is now called what?

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Q. 14:  What Catholic Bishop was killed in Rome on February 14 AD 270?

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Q. 15:  Where were the ‘Camp David Accords’ signed, and by whom?

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Q. 16:  Who,  in the 1970s and at the age of forty-three, became the world’s first female President and the youngest Head of State in Latin America?

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Q. 17:  Who founded the first US detective agency in 1850?

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Q. 18:  For what invention is Earl Silas Tupper best known?

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Q. 19:  Who said in a 1933 movie, “I could dance with you till the cows come home. On second thoughts, I’d rather dance with the cows till you came home” (A bonus point if you can name the movie.)

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Q. 20:  Which super group were originally called the ‘New Yardbirds’?

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ANSWERS

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Q.  1:  What is the longest river in South America?

A.  1:  The Amazon.

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Q.  2:  Philip Pirrip is the central character in which famous Charles Dickens novel?

A.  2:  Great Expectations.

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Q.  3:  ‘Firefly’, ‘The Mole’ and ‘Fab 2’ are all examples of what?

A.  3:  Vehicles in the TV series Thunderbirds.

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Q.  4:  This famous historical duke and his horse both had capital cities named after them. Can you name them? (A point for each correct answer.)

A.  4:  The famous historical duke is the Duke of Wellington, Wellington being the capital city of New Zealand;  the name of his horse was Copenhagen which is also the name of the capital city of Denmark.  

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Q.  5:  The island of Zealand is part of which country?

A.  5:  Denmark.

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Q.  6:  What is the name of the satirical novel by the American author Joseph Heller set during World War II from 1942 to 1944?

A.  6:  Catch-22.

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Q.  7:  What is the name of the Norwegian politician who became a puppet leader of his country during World War II, his name now a byword for treachery?

A.  7:  Vidkun Quisling.

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Q.  8:  This 1999 movie starring Will Smith, who also sang the title song, won five Golden Raspberry Awards for Worst Picture, Worst Director, Worst Screen Couple, Worst Screenplay and Worst Original Song – what was it?

A.  8:  Wild, Wild West.

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Q.  9:  Which island has the 2 official languages Sinhalese and Tamil?

A.  9:  Sri Lanka.

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Q. 10:  The site of this famous battle is now a National Monument, but in which American state did the Battle of The Little Bighorn take place?

A. 10:  Montana.

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Q. 11:  In order of popularity, can you name the world’s top three religions?

A. 11:  Christianity (2 billion followers approximately), Islam (1.6 billion) and Hinduism (1 billion).

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Q. 12:  Which South American city provides the setting for the 1982 movie ‘Missing’, starring Jack Lemmon?

A. 12:  Santiago de Chile. (You get a point if you just said Santiago.)

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Q. 13:  British Honduras is now called what?

A. 13:  Belize.

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Q. 14:  What Catholic Bishop was killed in Rome on February 14 AD 270?

A. 14:  Did the date give it away? The answer is, St Valentine.

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Q. 15:  Where were the ‘Camp David Accords’ signed, and by whom?

A. 15:  Although they are named after the location at which the secret negotiations preceding them took place, The ‘Camp David Accords’ were actually signed at the White House in Washington DC, by Egyptian President Anwar El Sadat and Israeli Prime Minister Menachem Begin on 17 September 1978, witnessed by United States President Jimmy Carter.

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Q. 16:  Who, in the 1970s at the age of forty-three, became the world’s first female President and the youngest Head of State in Latin America?

A. 16:  Isabel Peron.

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Q. 17:  Who founded the first US detective agency in 1850?

A. 17:  Allan Pinkerton.

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Q. 18:  For what invention is Earl Silas Tupper best known?

A. 18:  The clue was in the name, the answer is ‘Tupperware’.

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Q. 19:  Who said in a 1933 movie, “I could dance with you till the cows come home. On second thoughts, I’d rather dance with the cows till you came home” (A bonus point if you can name the movie.)

A. 19:  Groucho Marx in ‘Duck Soup’.

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Q. 20:  Which super group were originally called the ‘New Yardbirds’?

A. 20:  Led Zeppelin.

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Yesterday The Super Bowl – Today The Super Quiz!

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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First of all congratulations to the Seattle Seahawks who won their first Super Bowl by crushing the Denver Broncos 43-8, in a rather one-sided game yesterday.

Today it’s the super quiz and this won’t be so easy.

Yes, another random selection of questions, a lot of which will set you a challenge I think.

As usual if you get stuck the answers can be found waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay down below, but please NO cheating!

Enjoy and good luck.

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Quiz 07

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Q.  1:  Who won a best actor Oscar for his portrayal of an anthropophagus?

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Q.  2:  The Komodo dragon takes its name from as island in which country?

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Q.  3:  Which car company built the classic ‘1962 250 GT Berlinetta Boxer’ automobile?

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Q.  4:  Name the country from which the soup ‘Gazpacho’ originated?

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Q.  5:  Name the fictional detective associated with ‘Miss Felicity Lemon’?

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Q.  6:  In which famous movie would you find  a robot called ‘Marvin’?

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Q.  7:  ‘Winter’, ‘Secret’, ‘Dirty’, ‘Pastry’, ‘Cola’, ‘Pig’, ‘Honey’, ‘Football’, ‘Rif’ and ‘Cod’ are all examples of what?

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Q.  8:  What sauce is made from the plant ‘Armorica rusticana’?

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Q.  9:  Which of these is a comic character who appears in three plays by Shakespeare?

           a) Rifle            b) Musket            c) Pistol      

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Q. 10:  Rather appropriately for this month, the following line ‘February made me shiver‘ is found in which song?

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Q. 11:  Contestants from which South American country have won the most Miss Universe titles?

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Q. 12:  Which of these actors has won the most Best Actor Oscars?

            a) Tom Hanks        b) Kevin Spacey        c) Daniel Day Lewis        d) Jeff Bridges

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Q. 13:  John James Audubon is famous for his paintings of what?

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Q. 14:  Which large sea in the south-western Pacific Ocean is named after a German?

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Q. 15:  ‘Monique Delacroix’ was the mother of which debonair hero?

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Q. 16:  What is the name and the color of Jim Henson’s most famous creation?

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Q. 17:  This word is the name for a magnificent palace, a variety of apple and a person or thing without equal, what is it?

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Q. 18:  Name the movie in which Michael Caine plays ‘Lt Gonville Bromhead’?

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Q. 19:  What does a woman raise and hold up in a ‘Pabana’?

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Q. 20:  Which very famous soothing English song uses the melody from Mozart’s ‘Ah! Vous dirai-je, Maman’?

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ANSWERS

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Q.  1:  Who won a best actor Oscar for his portrayal of an anthropophagus?

A.  1:  Anthony Hopkins in ‘The Silence of the Lambs’, an anthropophagus is a cannibal.

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Q.  2:  The Komodo dragon takes its name from as island in which country?

A.  2:  Indonesia. (Probably because of the name a lot of people guess Japan.)

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Q.  3:  Which car company built the classic ‘1962 250 GT Berlinetta Boxer’ automobile?

A.  3:  Ferrari.

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Q.  4:  Name the country from which the soup ‘Gazpacho’ originated?

A.  4:  Spain. (You also get a point if you said Portugal.)

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Q.  5:  Name the fictional detective associated with ‘Miss Felicity Lemon’?

A.  5:  Hercule Poirot.

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Q.  6:  In which famous movie would you find  a robot called ‘Marvin’?

A.  6:  ‘A Hitchhiker’s Guide To The Galaxy’.

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Q.  7:  ‘Winter’, ‘Secret’, ‘Dirty’, ‘Pastry’, ‘Cola’, ‘Pig’, ‘Honey’, ‘Football’, ‘Rif’ and ‘Cod’ are all examples of what?

A.  7:  They are all names of different wars.

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Q.  8:  What sauce is made from the plant ‘Armorica rusticana’?

A.  8:  Horseradish.

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Q.  9:  Which of these is a comic character who appears in three plays by Shakespeare?

           a) Rifle            b) Musket            c) Pistol            

A.  9:  c) Pistol. (Pistol (fict) is a follower of Sir John Falstaff in Henry IV, Part 2 and The Merry Wives of Windsor. He is married to Mistress Quickly, and is a soldier in conflict with Fluellen, in Henry V.)

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Q. 10:  Rather appropriately for this month, the following line ‘February made me shiver‘ is found in which song?

A. 10:  American Pie (Don McLean).

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Q. 11:  Contestants from which South American country have won the most Miss Universe titles?

A.  11:  Venezuela (6, in 1979, 1981, 1986, 1996, 2008 and 2009).

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Q. 12:  Which of these actors has won the most Best Actor Oscars?

            a) Tom Hanks        b) Kevin Spacey        c) Daniel Day Lewis        d) Jeff Bridges

A. 12:  c) Daniel Day Lewis

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Q. 13:  John James Audubon is famous for his paintings of what?

A. 13:  Birds.  (An original copy of his book ‘Birds of America’ sold in London at Sotheby’s for a record £7,321,250 (approximately $11.5 million) on 6 December 2010.)

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Q. 14:  Which large sea in the south-western Pacific Ocean is named after a German?

A. 14:  The Bismarck Sea.

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Q. 15:  ‘Monique Delacroix’ was the mother of which debonair hero?

A. 15:  James Bond.

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Q. 16:  What is the name and the color of Jim Henson’s most famous creation?

A. 16:  Kermit the Frog and he is green.

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Q. 17:  This word is the name for a magnificent palace, a variety of apple and a person or thing without equal, what is it?

A. 17:  Nonsuch.

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Q. 18:  Name the movie in which Michael Caine plays ‘Lt Gonville Bromhead’?

A. 18:  Zulu.

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Q. 19:  What does a woman raise and hold up in a ‘Pabana’?

A. 19:  Her skirt. The Pabana (or Peacock dance) is a solemn and stately Spanish dance.

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Q. 20:  Which very famous soothing English song uses the melody from Mozart’s ‘Ah! Vous dirai-je, Maman’?

A. 20:  Twinkle Twinkle Little Star.

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A Monday Quiz

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Yes, it’s another Monday quiz here at the fasab blog.

Some tough questions this week, but a few multi-pointers so you still have the chance to score well.

Enjoy and very good luck.

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Quiz_button 02

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Q.  1:  Which Olympic superstar was nicknamed ‘The Czech Locomotive’?

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Q.  2:  Which two Disney ‘characters’ appear in the Bond movie ‘Diamonds Are Forever’?

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Q.  3:  ‘Yamazaki’ is a prize winning what?

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Q.  4:  Which fictional character was well versed in Latin and Greek, played excellent whist, spoke French and Spanish, was tone deaf and suffered from mal de mer?

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Q.  5:  What is the name of the largest mountain range in both Iran and Iraq?

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Q.  6:  We know this famous singer as ‘Sting’, but what is his real name?

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Q.  7:  Bellus, a rogue red star and its companion planet Zyra threaten the earth and cause a Noah’s Ark like scenario in which classic science fiction movie?

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Q.  8:  The name of which trendy beverage translated means ‘stained milk’?

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Q.  9:  Who dictated the Qur’an to Muhammad?

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Q. 10:  In the classic movie ‘Casablanca’, what were the last names for each of the following characters? One point for each correct answer.

a. Rick

b. Ilsa

c. Victor

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Q. 11:  What is the most populated city north of the Arctic Circle?

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Q. 12:  What was Sir Percy Blakeney’s colourful nickname?

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Q. 13:  What is Barrack Obama’s middle name?

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Q. 14:  What does the Greek root ‘hipp’ mean?

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Q. 15:  Which word meaning uproarious is derived from the nickname that was given to the psychiatric institution The Hospital of St. Mary of Bethlehem in London?

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Q. 16:  There are two famous David statues in Florence Italy. Who created  

    a. the bronze David (circa 1435) and

    b. the marble David (1501-1504)?

    (A point for each.)

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Q. 17:  The name of which little island country, popular with tourists, stems from the Portuguese for ‘bearded ones’?

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Q. 18:  Why did Edward VIII have to abdicate in 1936?

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Q. 19:  Twelve English actresses have won the Academy Award for best actress. Can you name them? One point for each correct answer.

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Q. 20:  What is the name of the deaf, dumb and blind kid who sure plays a mean pinball?

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ANSWERS

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Q.  1:  Which Olympic superstar was nicknamed ‘The Czech Locomotive’?

A.  1:  Emil Zatopek.

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Q.  2:  Which two Disney ‘characters’ appear in the Bond movie ‘Diamonds Are Forever’?

A.  2:  Bambi and Thumper. (The two female bodyguards)

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Q.  3:  ‘Yamazaki’ is a prize winning what?

A.  3:  Japanese whiskey.

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Q.  4:  Which fictional character was well versed in Latin and Greek, played excellent whist, spoke French and Spanish, was tone deaf and suffered from mal de mer?

A.  4:  Horatio Hornblower.

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Q.  5:  What is the name of the largest mountain range in both Iran and Iraq?

A.  5:  The Zagros mountains.

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Q.  6:  We know this famous singer as ‘Sting’, but what is his real name?

A.  6:  Gordon Sumner.

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Q.  7:  Bellus, a rogue red star and its companion planet Zyra threaten the earth and cause a Noah’s Ark like scenario in which classic science fiction movie?

A.  7:  When Worlds Collide (1951).

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Q.  8:  The name of which trendy beverage translated means ‘stained milk’?

A.  8:  Latte macchiato.

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Q.  9:  Who dictated the Qur’an to Muhammad?

A.  9:  The angel Jibril (Gabriel).

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Q. 10:  In the classic movie ‘Casablanca’, what were the last names for each of the following characters? One point for each correct answer.

a. Rick

b. Ilsa

c. Victor

A. 10:  Their last names were

a. Rick BLAINE

b. Ilsa LUND

c. Victor LASZLO

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Q. 11:  What is the most populated city north of the Arctic Circle?

A. 11:  Murmansk.

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Q. 12:  What was Sir Percy Blakeney’s colourful nickname?

A. 12:  The Scarlet Pimpernel.

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Q. 13:  What is Barrack Obama’s middle name?

A. 13:  Hussein.

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Q. 14:  What does the Greek root ‘hipp’ mean?

A. 14:  Horse.

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Q. 15:  Which word meaning uproarious is derived from the nickname that was given to the psychiatric institution The Hospital of St. Mary of Bethlehem in London?

A. 15:  Bedlam.

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Q. 16:  There are two famous David statues in Florence Italy. Who created  

    a. the bronze David (circa 1435) and

    b. the marble David (1501-1504)?

    (A point for each.)

A. 16:  a. the bronze David was created by Donatello (Donato di Nicola di Betto Bardi)

    b. the marble David was created by Michaelangelo.

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Q. 17:  The name of which little island country, popular with tourists, stems from the Portuguese for ‘bearded ones’?

A. 17:  Barbados.

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Q. 18:  Why did Edward VIII have to abdicate in 1936?

A. 18:  He wanted to marry Mrs Simpson, a divorcee.

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Q. 19:  Twelve English actresses have won the Academy Award for best actress. Can you name them? One point for each correct answer.

A. 19:  Vivien Leigh, Joan Fontaine, Greer Garson, Olivia de Havilland, Elizabeth Taylor, Julie Andrews, Julie Christie, Maggie Smith, Glenda Jackson, Emma Thompson, Helen Mirren and Kate Winslet.

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Q. 20:  What is the name of the deaf, dumb and blind kid who sure plays a mean pinball?

A. 20:  Tommy.

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Shut-Up!

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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padlock

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I’m not sure what the correct official term is, but now that the “Shutdown” crisis is over let’s hope it’s the “Shut-Up”.

For another few months anyway, Obama and the other inmates in the Washington asylum have managed to kick the can down the road again.

Who can tell who won the pissing contest. It seemed to me like there was a strong wind a blowin’ and they all got covered in it – piss, that is, not glory!

cartoon-shutdown-housegop-boehner

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But Obama has signed HR 2775 and made it the law of the land. The Treasury Department is authorized to suspend the debt ceiling, which to you and me means that the government can now spend as much as it likes and borrow as much as it likes. Start the printing presses boys!

We’ll have to go through it all again in February next year but I think what has happened this time has set a precedent for the debt ceiling to be removed completely to pay for Obamacare and a few more wars. It was all nonsense anyway.

It’s never a good thing to live beyond your means as many people throughout America and Europe discovered when the banksters stole our money, credit lines dried up and the real estate catastrophe occurred.

America will find that out too sometime down that long road that the can is being kicked. But leave that problem for your grandchildren.

For now its spend, spend, spend!!!

empty pockets

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I Used To Be Quite Good At Wordplay. Once A Pun A Time!

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Once a pun a time there was a blog that championed that element of humor called word play. You are about to read the latest batch of these puns right now.

So all that remains to be said is, enjoy!

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I walked into the boss’s office and handed him a pear.

“What’s this for?” He asked.

“A pay rise.” I replied.

“My wife told me to grow it first and then ask you.”

grow-a-pear

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The other day a friend of mine hit me with a chocolate bar.

How dairy!

cadbury-dairy-milk

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HMV to close sixty stores.

Is this the Vinyl Countdown?

cadbury-dairy-milk

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I won £10,000 on a scratchcard last week and the wife said

we should draw up a list of what to spend it on.

“Well, I’m going to book a holiday for one.”

“Oh goody” she screamed excitedly, “I can’t wait!”

Can’t help thinking she’s misunderstood what I said.

single-vacation

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I was reading through the ingredients for

a fruit salad I’m making today and it said:

“Pineapples: five cubed.”

I’m not sure though,

125 will probably be too many.

5 cubed

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My friend has no hands.

I feel for him.

no hands

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When I was young, my mum always used to hit me with the telephone.

I was always on the receiving end…..

telephone-cartoon

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My calculator is missing the minus button,

but on the plus side, it still works.

calculator

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A gay guy asked me if I liked to blow people.

I told him I’m not a fan.

cartoons-fan

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I just hired a really uncomfortable car.

It Hertz like hell.

hertz

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I said to my friend, “I just watched that film about the Nazis.”

He said, “Oh what, the one with Adolf in?”

I said, “No mate, you’re thinking of ‘Flipper’, this was just about the Nazis.”

flipper

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I went house hunting at the weekend.

I went to see one house that had mirrors all over the walls.

I thought, “I can see myself living here.”

mirror walls

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I told my Chinese friend that I bought very cheap cigarettes

that were shipped in from a foreign country.

He said, “Is that Regal?”

regal cigarettes

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Why shouldn’t you buy Ukrainian underpants?

Because Chernobyl fallout.

ukraine_viktoryanukovych

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I was walking into my local pub,

when I suddenly realized it was darts night.

So I did a 180 and left.

darts 180

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Our Brazilian housekeeper is rubbish at making the beds.

She’s very tidy downstairs though.            

brazilian

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There was an unbelievably close finish

in this years “Shemale of the year” contest.

It was a Thai.        

thai

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Everyone can put on their curriculum vitae

that they know a little Latin.

logo CV

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I’ve got a fear of two-letter words.

I get scared just thinking about it.

Scary

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I turned to my wife last night and said,

“I’m into anal”.

She gave me a look of despair and glared at me as she said,

“Animal”.

I love it when we do the cryptic crossword together.

cryptic crossword

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