Catering for the lowest common denominator in intelligence can be very frustrating for the rest of us.
But apparently stupidity has reached levels today where stupid people will hurt themselves with things that shouldn’t hurt them, if they had the wit to understand what they were and how use them properly.
Personally I think there is some merit in letting them get on with it and perhaps thereby gradually eliminating chronic stupidity from the gene pool.
In the meantime all we can do is cringe and laugh.
Last week we had the BIG Christmas quiz and thank you to everyone who visited and tried it out.
And a very special thanks to the Coastal Crone who reblogged it.
Since we are all used to ‘leftovers’ at this time of the year I thought I would use my leftover questions from last week’s BIG quiz for a little one this week.
The questions still have a Christmassy theme and as usual, if you get stuck, you can find the answers waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay down below.
So enjoy what’s left of the Christmas holiday and good luck with the quiz.
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Q. 1: How many points does a snowflake have? (Sorry there’s only one point for the correct answer.)
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Q. 2: Charles Dickens is said to have considered the names ‘Little Larry’ and ‘Puny Pete’ for which character? (A bonus point is available if you can also correctly name the Dickens novel in which the character appears.)
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Q. 3: In which country that made the news a lot during 2014, and the largest country of its continent, is it said that finding a spider web on Christmas morning brings good luck, and so Christmas trees are decorated with artificial spider webs?
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Q. 4: What is New Year’s Eve called in Scotland?
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Q. 5: What former Egyptian president was born on Christmas day in 1918?
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Q. 6: Which alcoholic ingredient is used in a ‘Snowball’ cocktail?
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Q. 7: And what animal is ‘Snowball’ in George Orwell’s ‘Animal Farm’?
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Q. 8: Derived from the Latin word meaning ‘coming’, what is the name of the period leading up to Christmas?
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Q. 9: In the rhyme ‘Christmas is coming’, who is getting ‘fat’?
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Q. 10: The first singing radio commercial, which aired in the US on Christmas Eve 1926, was for which brand?
a) Rolex b) BMW c) Wheaties d) Durex
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Q. 11: Why is the male turkey often referred to as ‘Tom Turkey’?
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Q. 12: In what country did Christmas Trees originate?
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Q. 13: How many ‘Wise Men’ brought gifts to Jesus?
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Q. 14: Which English monarch was crowned on Christmas Day in Westminster Abbey?
a) William I b) William II c) William III d) William IV
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Q. 15: Name the two administrative and ex-colonial regions of China for which Christmas day remains a legal public holiday, whereas in the main country it is not? (A point for each that you name correctly.)
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Q. 16: The Christmas favorite of ‘Pigs in Blankets’ is chipolata sausages wrapped in what?
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Q. 17: In Mexico, it is said that wearing what color underwear on New Year’s Eve ensures finding new love the following year?
a) Yellow b) Green c) Red d) Brown
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Q. 18: Father Christmas is known as ‘Pai Natal’ in which European country?
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Q. 19: The surname ‘Chandler’ derives from the making or selling of what?
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Q. 20: What was Mr Bean searching for when he got his head stuck in a turkey?
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ANSWERS
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Q. 1: How many points does a snowflake have? (Sorry there’s only one point for the correct answer.)
A. 1: Six.
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Q. 2: Charles Dickens is said to have considered the names ‘Little Larry’ and ‘Puny Pete’ for which character? (A bonus point is available if you can also correctly name the Dickens novel in which the character appears.)
A. 2: The character is ‘Tiny Tim’ and he appears in ‘A Christmas Carol’.
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Q. 3: In which country that made the news a lot during 2014, and the largest country of its continent, is it said that finding a spider web on Christmas morning brings good luck, and so Christmas trees are decorated with artificial spider webs?
A. 3: The correct answer is Ukraine. (Since it is the time to be generous you can also have a point if you said ‘Poland’. Although it does not fulfill all the parameters of the question, spiders or spider webs are common Christmas trees decorations in Poland because according to legend, a spider wove a blanket for Baby Jesus. In fact, Polish people consider spiders to be symbols of goodness and prosperity at Christmas.)
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Q. 4: What is New Year’s Eve called in Scotland?
A. 4: Hogmanay.
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Q. 5: What former Egyptian president was born on Christmas day in 1918?
A. 5: Anwar Sadat.
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Q. 6: Which alcoholic ingredient is used in a ‘Snowball’ cocktail?
A. 6: Advocaat.
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Q. 7: And what animal is ‘Snowball’ in George Orwell’s ‘Animal Farm’?
A. 7: A Pig.
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Q. 8: Derived from the Latin word meaning ‘coming’, what is the name of the period leading up to Christmas?
A. 8: Advent.
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Q. 9: In the rhyme ‘Christmas is coming’, who is getting ‘fat’?
A. 9: The goose.
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Q. 10: The first singing radio commercial, which aired in the US on Christmas Eve 1926, was for which brand?
a) Rolex b) BMW c) Wheaties d) Durex
A. 10: The correct answer is c) Wheaties.
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Q. 11: Why is the male turkey often referred to as ‘Tom Turkey’?
A. 11: After Thomas Jefferson, because Jefferson was opposed to the idea of a turkey as the national bird.
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Q. 12: In what country did Christmas Trees originate?
A. 12: Germany. (Technically it was Latvia but at that time it was part of Germany.)
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Q. 13: How many ‘Wise Men’ brought gifts to Jesus?
A. 13: ‘More than one’ is the correct answer, the Bible does not specify how many. (If you said ‘3’ you don’t get a point.)
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Q. 14: Which English monarch was crowned on Christmas Day in Westminster Abbey?
a) William I b) William II c) William III d) William IV
A. 14: The correct answer is a) William I.
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Q. 15: Name the two administrative and ex-colonial regions of China for which Christmas day remains a legal public holiday, whereas in the main country it is not? (A point for each that you name correctly.)
A. 15: Hong Kong and Macau.
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Q. 16: The Christmas favorite of ‘Pigs in Blankets’ is chipolata sausages wrapped in what?
A. 16: Bacon.
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Q. 17: In Mexico, it is said that wearing what color underwear on New Year’s Eve ensures finding new love the following year?
a) Yellow b) Green c) Red d) Brown
A. 17: The correct answer is c) Red.
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Q. 18: Father Christmas is known as ‘Pai Natal’ in which European country?
A. 18: Portugal.
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Q. 19: The surname ‘Chandler’ derives from the making or selling of what?
A. 19: Candles.
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Q. 20: What was Mr Bean searching for when he got his head stuck in a turkey?
Another foray into the hidden shallows of the human mind as shown by the answers some hapless contestants have given on television and radio quiz shows.
Marvel at the stupidity.
And enjoy!
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Q: Name something you might buy that could turn out to be phony
A:A Horse
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Q: Name something that dries up as it gets old
A:Water
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Q: The one thing that the people living near you have that you want
A:A beautiful wife
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Q: Name something most women wouldn’t be caught leaving the house without
A:A Tampon
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Q: Name a body part that gets bigger as people get older
A:Penis
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Q: Name a foreign country people vacation in where it would be easy to pack on 10 pounds.
A:Paris
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Q: Which one of the seven dwarfs you most often feel like
A:Weepy
A:Drowsy
A:Grouchy
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Q: Name a question you hate when people ask it to you
A:“Are those real?”
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Q: The hardest position to play on a baseball team
A:Quarterback
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Q: Name a city in the state of Georgia
A:Alabama
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Q: An excuse you use when stopped for speeding
A:“I was drinking”
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Q: Name something newlyweds share
A:Underwear
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Q: Name something you would buy in a stationery store
A:Water
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Q: Name a question that a gentleman would never ask a lady on a first date
Another selection of those awkward moments we all experience as we journey through life. Some make you laugh, some make you angry, but all of them make you feel a little bit stupider that you really thought you were.
Enjoy.
That awkward moment when you realize you left the rest room with your dress tucked into your undies.
(Definitely haven’t managed that one yet, but I know someone who has.)
That awkward moment when you accidentally fart doing sit-ups at the Gym.
(Hey, another gold medal possibility if they make it an Olympic sport. For ‘accidentally’ read ‘inevitably’.)
That awkward moment when you see someone coming your way after you’ve just farted.
(Why do you think people take dogs with them for walks?)
That awkward moment when your girlfriend asks you if you love her more than your car.
(There’s only one answer to this one.)
That awkward moment when you bend down and your pants rip and you’re wearing floral underwear.
(Hello sailor!!!)
That awkward moment when you get caught in the rain in a cheesecloth dress, and really big underwear.
(I told you I don’t wear dresses, but seen it happen, very funny. Really big underwear, also known to us men folk as, ‘kidney warmers’. Sorry ladies.)
That awkward moment when someone walks in while you’re changing.
(Can be just as awkward when you walk in on someone else – or not – depending.)
That awkward moment when you confidently say the wrong answer aloud in class.
(And then try to turn the whole thing into a bad joke.)
That awkward moment when someone is doing the dishes and you slowly put another dish in the sink.
(Just do it with a smile and you’ll be okay. But only do it once.)
That awkward moment when you are trying to impress someone on the dance-floor but you dance into a pole.
(Prefer to watch other people dance where there are poles.)
That awkward moment when you think the trash can is a stool.
(So why hasn’t anyone invented a trash can that doubles as a stool – or is that a crap idea?)
The awkward moment when your friends make plans right in front of you, and the plans don’t include you.
(I can take a hint.)
That awkward moment when you’re so tired from taking a nap that you feel like to have to take another nap to get over your nap.
(Oh yes, the nap recovery nap nap!)
That awkward moment when you lose your bikini top in the surf.
(Not a problem for me, but I see the point…er..points??)
That awkward moment when you are on the beach and someone has told you that your tampon string is hanging out of your bikini.
(What does one do, and where does one do it?)
That awkward moment when you don’t know where to stand to pull your wedgie out without being noticed.
(Impossible to do without being seen. Impossible to do and still look elegant.)
That awkward moment when your neighbor starts talking to you while you’re hanging out your underwear.
(Hi there, washing the smalls today?)
That awkward moment when one heel flies off your high heels on the dance floor.
(It still baffles me why women wear high heels and how they can walk in them – or not, see videos.)
You may discover the true meaning of life in today’s post (naw, okay, you probably won’t). Nevertheless here is a selection of questions that needed asking but that no one ever asks – until now, that is.
Enjoy.
Why do people say ‘the sky is the limit’ when there are footprints on the moon?
If a lawyer says to the judge “I’m Lying”, is he telling the truth?
Why do we call it ‘after dark’ when it’s really ‘after light’?
Why isn’t the number 11 pronounced ‘onety-one’?
What if the Hokey Pokey REALLY IS what it’s all about?
Why is there only 12 hours on a clock?
If you have sex with a prostitute against her will, is it considered rape or shoplifting?
How long is a piece of string?
Can animals commit suicide?
Why does the Easter bunny carry eggs? Rabbits don’t lay eggs!
Did London Bridge ever fall down?
Is it possible to be allergic to water?
Why do super-heroes wear their underwear on the outside of their clothes?
Why are women and men’s shoe sizes different?
What was the best thing BEFORE sliced bread?
How do you make seven even?
Why do they call it a ‘Television Set’ when there’s only one?
How fast do you need to cook for it to be considered ‘Fast Food’?
Where does the ‘o’ come from when we abbreviate the word ‘number’?
Why do they imply the ‘birds and the bees’ get up to something together?
There are times and places I suppose one shouldn’t laugh, not that I bother too much about that, but one time when it is socially acceptable is on a Monday morning.
Here is your chance to test that out with another selection of ridiculous quiz show answers.
Enjoy.
Q: Name something roofs are made of
A: Chalk stuff
Q: Name something men do when they run out of clean underwear
A: Turn them inside out
Q: Name something that people steal from work
A: Cash register
Q: Name a famous Peter
A: Peter
Q: Name something that finishes the sentence: “You’re slower than…”
A: Moses
Q: Name something you feel before you buy it
A: Excited
Q: Name something you hope your dog doesn’t do right before he licks your head
A: Burps
Q: The ideal daily temperature
A: 98.6?F
Q: Name something with claws
A: Christmas
Q: Name something you wear two of at the same time
A: Underwear
Q: The first thing you take off after work
A: Underwear
Q: An occasion for which you stayed up all night
A: Lost virginity
Q: Name something that just you know is going break when its warranty runs out
A: Glass
Q: Name a bird that some people look like when they walk
A: Dolphin
Q: Name something you hope your husband never loses (asked to 100 married women)
A: His pants
Q: Name something a woman needs to have before she gets married
A: A pap smear
Q: Name something babies throw out of their crib
A: Prayer book
Q: Name something that gets wet when you use it
A: Toilet paper
Q: Name something that guests get hit with on Jerry Springer
A: Keys
Q: An occupation that begins with the letter “J”
A: A jackhammerer
Q: Name something people take to a bath
A: Duck
Q: Name a letter many words begin with
A: Dear John
Q: Name something you wish you had one of for each person in your home
A: A house
Q: Name something office workers turn off at the end of the day
A: Their brains
Q: An actor who played a gangster
A: Al Capone
Q: Name something you throw away daily
A: Toilet paper
Q: Name a place where you take off your clothes, besides home
A: School
Q: Name something you wash more than once per day
A: Socks
Q: Name a man’s name that starts with the letter “P”
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