Failure Is The Path Of Least Persistence.

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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If failure is path of least persistence, you can’t accuse me of failing to stick up for puns.

This series has already been going a lot longer than I ever imagined.

Will it ever end?

Eventually I suppose.

But not this week.

So enjoy or endure some more!

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It’s your attitude and not your aptitude

that determines your altitude.

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Last night I had a dream that a silicon chip and

a hard drive conditionally offered to bring my dinner over.

If memory serves me.

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It’s been decided that there will be a

new gay wing of the Government.

They’re starting with the Homo Office.

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Who is the worst chicken killer in Shakespeare?

Macbeth. He did murder most foul.

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L’Oreal camouflage paint.

Because you’re war fit.

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My wife gave me a leaflet about

anger management last week…

I lost it.

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People hang on my every word.

Probably why I lost my job at the Samaritans.

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Two old ladies knocked on my door,

selling the bible and brown bread,

they were the Hovis witnesses!

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I’ve got an idea for a new interactive reality TV show.

It’s called ‘Bone Idol’.

I can’t be bothered to send it in though.

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At the recent winter Olympics, as the rest of the

bobsleigh team prepared for their first run,

the brake man suddenly fell to the floor clutching his leg.

“Go on without me,” he cried.

“I’ll only slow you down.”

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Drilling for oil is boring.

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I used to run a dating agency for chickens.

But I was struggling to make hens meet.

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Did you hear about the Frenchman

who could only count to seven?

He had a huit allergy.

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Cool, although I just barley got it…a little corny….

I can’t help it, they just keep cropping up….

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A bulb walks into an airport without any bags

wearing nothing but a shirt, sandals, and a hat.

The check in girl looks at him and says,

“Travelling light?”

The bulb says “Yes, I am.”

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Did You Know? Another Rummage Through The Fasab Fact Files

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Hello again and welcome to another rummage through the fasab fact files.

As random as ever, this selection covers many centuries and many countries so you should find something of interest.

Enjoy.

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1 in 5 of the world’s doctors are Russian.

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The Nullarbor Plain of Australia covers

100,000 square miles (160,900 km) without a tree.

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In 1933, Mickey Mouse, an animated cartoon character,

received 800,000 fan letters.

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Nerve impulses to and from the brain

travel as fast as 170 miles (274 km) per hour.

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Ancient Egyptians shaved off their eyebrows

to mourn the deaths of their cats.

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Canadian researchers have found that

Einstein’s brain was 15% wider than normal.

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Isaac Asimov is the only author

to have a book in every Dewey-decimal category.

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The shortest British monarch was Charles I,

who was 4 feet 9 inches.

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Sigmund Freud had a morbid fear of ferns.

(Something to do with his mother no doubt!)

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Camels chew in a figure 8 pattern.

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In space, astronauts cannot cry,

because there is no gravity,

so the tears can’t flow.

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There are 1,792 steps in the Eiffel Tower

 

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A silicon chip a quarter inch square

has the capacity of the original 1949 ENIAC computer,

which occupied a city block.

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About a third of all Americans flush the toilet

while they’re still sitting on it.

 

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Actor Tommy Lee Jones and vice president Al Gore

were freshman roommates at Harvard.

 

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In eighteenth century England,

women’s wigs were sometimes 4 feet high.

These remarkable headdresses were dusted with flour

and decorated with stuffed birds, replicas of gardens,

plates of fruit, or even model ships.

 

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In 1976 a Los Angeles secretary named Jannene Swift

officially married a 50 pound rock.

The ceremony was witnessed by more than 20 people.

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In Tokyo, they sell toupees for dogs.

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John has a long moustache was the coded signal

used by the French Resistance in WWII

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