Do You Need Help?

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Now and again people have said to me, “You need help.” And I’m not just talking about people who read this blog. They mean it in a caring way I’m sure and indeed there are occasions when a little help would be very welcome.

This is especially so in business. In these cases you are even willing to pay for that help, but you still have the problem of letting people know that you have a job for them.

So what do you do?

You advertise the available positions, of course.

Sounds easy?

Well, for most of us it is. For the intellectually challenged not so much.

Take a look at this lot below and you’ll see what I mean.

Enjoy!

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helpwanted01

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helpwanted02

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helpwanted03

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helpwanted07

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helpwanted04

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helpwanted08

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helpwanted09

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helpwanted05

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helpwanted10

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helpwanted06

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helpwanted11

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helpwanted12

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helpwanted13

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helpwanted16

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helpwanted14

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helpwanted17

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helpwanted15

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helpwanted18

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helpwanted19

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helpwanted21

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helpwanted20

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helpwanted22

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The Ultimate Signs From The Churches

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Today we have the final selection in our look at some Church signs that went the way of the failed classifieds.

See if you can pick out the ones that didn’t quite turn out as the author probably intended.

Enjoy.

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church_methodistmarquais

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church_myspaceinheaven.

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church_newprospectchurch.

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church_noacinhell.

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church_noahandthe2mosquitoes.

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church_obamasign16.

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church_ohgod.

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church_onyourknees.

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church_prepareforyourfinals.

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church_readthebibleuser.

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church_santadiedfornobody.

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church_somequestions.

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church_spiritualfruitfornuts.

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church_stjopsephsign.

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church_stolenbible.

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church_stopdropandroll.

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church_swallowingpride.

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church_turnoffthycellphone.

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churchsignsnow.

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church_thekingwhoridesadonkey.

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church_thetonguecanslip

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church_thevirginmary

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More Signs From The Church

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Today another selection of signs from various Churches that didn’t turn out to be s heavenly as perhaps intended, but some of them quite clever too! (But not the first one though, they couldn’t even spell Church!)

Enjoy.

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church_forgiveyourenemies

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church_godshownofavoritism

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church_godslastname400

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church_havefaithlifted

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church_howwillyouspendeternity

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church_ifevolution

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church_ifyourreligion

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church_Ihatethischurch

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church_Ikissedagirl

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church_imaginehell

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church_letmebetheperson

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church_lookingforasignfrojmGod

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church_loosetongue

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church_makingholywater

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church_mandatoryrectalprobe

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church_lipsthattouchliquor

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Another Tuesday And Another List Of Those Questions

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Another Tuesday and another list of questions so important that no one seems to want to ask them –  except here of course.

Enjoy.

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Where does the toe-tag go on a dead person if they don’t have toes?

toetag. 

If you dug a hole through the center of the earth and jumped in, would you stay at the center because of gravity?

Gravity elevator
Gravity elevator

 

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Why is there a disclaimer on the Allstate Auto Insurance commercials that says “Not available in all states”?

Allstate Insurance logo - "Not available in all States"
“Not available in all States”

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Do they bury people with their braces on?

braces
braces

 

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How far east can you go before you’re heading west?

compass .

Do dentists go to other dentists or do they just do it themselves?

dentist
dentist

 

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If, in a baseball game, the batter hits a ball splitting it right down the center with half the ball flying out of the park and the other half being caught, what is the final ruling?

homerun .

Why do people think that swaying their arm back and forth would change the direction of a bowling ball?

Bowler
Bowler

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Why is it that everyone driving faster than you is considered an idiot, and everyone driving slower than you is a moron?

Angry driver 

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If pro and con are opposites, wouldn’t the opposite of progress be congress?

No Progress Congress 

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Why does grape flavor smell the way it is when actual grapes don’t taste or smell anything like it.

grapes .

If girls with large breasts work at Hooters, then do girls with one leg work at IHOP?

hootersihop

 

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If a kid refuses to sleep during nap time, are they guilty of resisting a rest?

disobedient child 

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Is it rude for a deaf person to talk (sign) with their mouth full of food?

sign-language 

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If a transvestite goes missing, would you put their face on a carton of Half and Half?

 transvestite cartoon

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When does it stop being partly cloudy and start being partly sunny?

partly sunny? - or - partly cloudy?
partly sunny? – or – partly cloudy?

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Are eyebrows considered facial hair?

bushy eyebrows

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If a baby’s leg pops out at 11:59PM but his head doesn’t come out until 12:01, which day was he born on?

stork cartoon .

Since bread is square, then why is sandwich meat round?

The square bread - round meat conundrum
The square bread – round meat conundrum

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Why is the Lone Ranger called ‘Lone’ if he always has his Indian friend Tonto with him?

Lone Ranger and Tonto
Lone Ranger and Tonto

 

 

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