Another Day For All You Quizzers Out There.

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Another set of twenty questions to get you thinking.

They say they are all easy if you know the answers – and can remember them!

Good luck with this lot, some are easy but some are quite tough.

And if you get stuck you’ll find the answers waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay down below – but NO cheating please!

Enjoy.

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quiz confused1

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Q.  1:  Which vitamin is also known as ascorbic acid?

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Q.  2:  Approximately what percentage of all the water on Earth is fresh water?

           a)  3%        b)  13%        c) 23%        d) 33%

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Q.  3:  In Greek mythology which Trojan hero killed Achilles?

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Q.  4:  In which Hitchcock movie is Cary Grant’s character the victim of mistaken identity?

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Q.  5:  What type of animal is a skink?

           a) Snake        b) Lizard        c) Marsupial

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Q.  6:  In German cuisine what is Stollen?

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Q.  7:  Which of these wars took place first?

           a) Boer War         b) First World War        c) Crimean War

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Q.  8:  Which American company produces the Polo clothing line?

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Q.  9:  On what English play is the musical West Side Story based?

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Q. 10:  What color is known as sable in heraldry?

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Q. 11:  Which Apostle is often described as the first Pope?

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Q. 12:  Professor Robert Langdon features in novels by which American author?

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Q. 13:  What shape is ‘rigatoni’ pasta?

            a) shell        b) tube        c) cartwheel        d) spiral

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Q. 14:  ‘Nature morte’ is the French term for what type of painting?

            a) portrait        b) landscape        c) still life

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Q. 15:  The term ‘zoophagous’ has a similar meaning to which of the following words?

            a) carnivorous        b) herbivorous        c) piscivorous

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Q. 16:  What does the musical term ‘adagio’ mean?

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Q. 17:  Harold Holt who disappeared while swimming in 1967 was the Prime Minister of which country?

            a) Canada        b) United Kingdom        c) Australia         d) New Zealand

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Q. 18:  In what country did the tango dance originate?

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Q. 19:  Which US President did John Hinckley try to assassinate?

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Q. 20:  In what year did Elvis Presley die?

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ANSWERS

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Q.  1:  Which vitamin is also known as ascorbic acid?

A.  1:  Vitamin C.

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Q.  2:  Approximately what percentage of all the water on Earth is fresh water?

           a)  3%        b)  13%        c) 23%        d) 33%

A.  2:  a)  3%

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Q.  3:  In Greek mythology which Trojan hero killed Achilles?

A.  3:  Paris, who shot him in the heel with a poison arrow.

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Q.  4:  In which Hitchcock movie is Cary Grant’s character the victim of mistaken identity?

A.  4:  North By Northwest.

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Q.  5:  What type of animal is a skink?

           a) Snake        b) Lizard        c) Marsupial

A.  5:  b) Lizard

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Q.  6:  In German cuisine what is Stollen?

A.  6:  A Fruit Loaf.

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Q.  7:  Which of these wars took place first?

           a) Boer War         b) First World War        c) Crimean War

A.  7:  c) Crimean War

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Q.  8:  Which American company produces the Polo clothing line?

A.  8:  Ralph Lauren.

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Q.  9:  On what English play is the musical West Side Story based?

A.  9:  Romeo And Juliet by William Shakespeare.

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Q. 10:  What color is known as sable in heraldry?

A. 10:  Black.

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Q. 11:  Which Apostle is often described as the first Pope?

A. 11:  Peter.

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Q. 12:  Professor Robert Langdon features in novels by which American author?

A. 12:  Dan Brown.

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Q. 13:  What shape is ‘rigatoni’ pasta?

            a) shell        b) tube        c) cartwheel        d) spiral

A. 13:  b) tube.

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Q. 14:  ‘Nature morte’ is the French term for what type of painting?

            a) portrait        b) landscape        c) still life

A. 14:  c) still life.

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Q. 15:  The term ‘zoophagous’ has a similar meaning to which of the following words?

            a) carnivorous        b) herbivorous        c) piscivorous

A. 15:  a) carnivorous.

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Q. 16:  What does the musical term ‘adagio’ mean?

A. 16:  Slow.

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Q. 17:  Harold Holt who disappeared while swimming in 1967 was the Prime Minister of which country?

            a) Canada        b) United Kingdom        c) Australia         d) New Zealand

A. 17:  c) Australia

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Q. 18:  In what country did the tango dance originate?

A. 18:  Argentina.

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Q. 19:  Which US President did John Hinckley try to assassinate?

A. 19:  Ronald Reagan.

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Q. 20:  In what year did Elvis Presley die?

A. 20:  1977.

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Clones Are People Two.

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Great news today!

The September puns start here.

I know you will, but I’ll say it anyway.

Enjoy!

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My son broke his Apple computer today and

had the audacity to ask me to buy him a new one.

I just told him, “Apples don’t grow on trees you know!”

pun apple tree

 

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I didn’t hear the sea when I held a Shell up.

I did, however, get six years in jail

for armed robbery of a gas station.

pun shell gas station

 

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NBC have commissioned my new show about

what goes on inside an airplane cockpit.

We’re filming the pilot next week.

pun pilot

 

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A man walks into a library and says

“I hope you don’t have a book on reverse psychology.”

pun reverse-psychology1

 

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People used to tell me being blind would

hinder my chances of becoming a comedian.

Who’s laughing now?

pun blind-turkey-farmer

 

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My cheating ex-girlfriend was called Tulsa.

Looking back, she was aslut.

pun tulsa aslut

 

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My friend recently moved in with his girlfriend

and her massive magazine collection.

But when she refused to part with them he left her.

Apparently she had too many issues.

pun too many issues

 

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I’m not worried about the Third World War.

That’s the Third World’s Problem.

pun Third World

 

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I have got a bit of a reputation as a ladies man in my local bar.

All I can say is, they smell so much cleaner than the gents.

pun toilet-cologne-stadium

 

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Some guy broke into my house last night.

Thankfully the only thing he took was one of my bullets.

pun santa-burglar

 

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My father’s answer to everything was alcohol.

He didn’t drink, he was just bad at quizzes.

pun simpsonsgood46

 

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I recently went on a holiday to a place called Romania.

It was useless; no one was even rowing.

pun rowing

 

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A guy I know has invented a new hobby

called “blindfold plane watching”.

Can’t see it taking off.

pun blindfolded

 

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I was watching a DVD on my laptop when I thought,

“Maybe it would be better if I put it in.”

pun laptop-with-open-dvd-tray-and-usb-flash-drive

 

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My wife told me she was absolutely fed up with the world.

“Why?” I asked

“Arrogant people like you!” she screamed back.

I said “Yeah they do, don’t they?”

pun cocksure

 

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Someone has been pretending to be Mr T by using a similar name,

but no-one knows his real identity.

It’s a Mr E.

pun mr t

 

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I’m reading a book about the Titanic at the moment,

and the experts speculate that the designer of the Titanic had a lisp.

That’s unthinkable!

pun titanic

 

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I went to the shop and said, “I need a battery so I can tell the time.”

The man said, “Is it for a clock?”

I said, “How do I know, that’s why I asked you for a battery.”

pun cartoon for a clock

 

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I won $2 million on the lottery this weekend

so I decided to donate a quarter of it to charity.

Now I have $ 1,999,999.75.

pun united_states_quarter

 

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I’ll leave you with a word of warning.

pun beware

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