One Of Today’s Facts Is Really A No Brainer!

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Yes, one of today’s facts in a ‘no-brainer’, but hopefully interesting as well.

There are lots of others too on a range of unrelated subjects.

So peruse at you leisure and….

Enjoy.

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April 4, June 6, October 10 and December 12

will all fall on the same day of the week in any year.

These days are called ‘doomsdays’,

and they are meant to help calculate

the day of the week of any given date.

In 2014 the doomsdays were all on Fridays

whereas 2015’s doomsdays are all on Saturday.

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Milton Hershey,

the man creator of one of the

greatest chocolate bars of all time,

had tickets to be on the Titanic,

but changed his plans and did not go.

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The oldest Egyptian pyramid is

believed to be the Pyramid of Djoser

which was built in the Saqqara Necropolis

during the 27th century BC.

However, the Pyramid of Khufu

(also known as Great Pyramid of Giza

or the Pyramid of Cheops) is the largest,

its original height being 146.5 meters (481 feet)

(the current height is 138.8 meters (455 feet)).

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A child born in Sweden in 1991 was named

Brfxxccxxmnpcccclllmmnprxvclmnckssqlbb11116.

Which his parents said was pronounced ‘Albin’.

The name was meant as a protest

against Swedish naming laws.

The parents were fined 5,000 kronor

in 1996 (roughly 740 U.S. Dollars).

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A polar bear’s stark white fur

is not exactly what it appears to be

because their hair follicles are transparent,

hollow tubes which reflect whatever

light surrounds them.

When their fur takes on a yellowish

or greenish tint it is due to age and dirt,

while the greenish color is caused by

algae that can grow on polar bear fur

in unnaturally warm and humid environments.

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On Mars

there is something that looks exactly

like either a really tall humanoid statue.

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The heart pumps blood to almost all

of the body’s 75 trillion cells,

only the corneas receive no blood supply.

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About one hundred hours of video

are uploaded to YouTube every single minute.

In other words, more videos are uploaded

to YouTube in two months

than the three major US networks

created in sixty years.

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The Aston Martin factory has a

robot nicknamed the ‘James Bonder’.

That is used to apply adhesives that

bond aluminum body panels together.

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The term ‘No-brainer’ is a relatively modern

phrase used to describe making a very easy decision.

One of the earliest sources for it comes from an

issue of the Lethbridge Herald of 1968

which stated about an ice hockey coach:

“He’d break in on a goalie and the netminder

would make one of those saves that our

manager-coach, Sid Abel, calls ‘a no-brainer.’ ”

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The world’s quietest room is -9 decibels,

so quiet you can hear the blood

flowing in your own body!

The silence of the room can cause

hallucinations, and the longest anyone

has ever spent in the room is 45 minutes.

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The average person produces about

half a liter of fart gas per day

or about 14 farts worth on average.

Some have been clocked at speeds of 10ft per sec.

Phew!

 

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When a person becomes very stressed,

anxious or scared the frontal lobe of the

brain can sometimes be overridden which

can make you feel the need to pee

at that moment or more frequently.

Hence sayings like such and such  ..

”scared the piss out of me.”

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In the Home Alone movie

Buzz’s girlfriend was not a girl at all,

she/he was the art director’s son

made up to look like a girl.

They thought using a real girl’s photo

would be too cruel for an actual teenage girl.

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Kelsey Grammar sings and plays the piano

for the theme song of Frasier.

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Check This One Out: 1

 “Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Once again the clue to today’s post was in the title.

And since you checked the one in the title out why not check the rest of them out too.

Here is the latest selection of puns for you to endure or hopefully, enjoy.

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Tell you what floats my boat.

Water.

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What do houseflies and Mac users have in common?

Neither of them understand how Windows work.

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Is it true that an apple a day keeps the doctor away…

or is it just one of Granny’s myths?

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I for one…

…but that’s Roman numerals for you.

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I knew a guy who fell into an industrial grinding machine.

He’s fine now.

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I have no beef with vegetarians.

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I slipped on some dog s**t the other day.

It didn’t suit me though.

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I hate it how people keep texting me “k”.

I am very rarely in the mood to talk about potassium.

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I bought some biscuits yesterday, on the packet it said,

“Store in a cool place.”

So I mailed them to Samuel L. Jackson’s house.

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When I was a kid people used to cover me

in cream and put a cherry on my head,

it was tough being brought up in the gateau.    

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I bought a CD which was just the sound of water flowing.

I didn’t like it though, it was too main-stream.

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A bartender drowned in a tidal wave of tonic water after a case exploded,

he was schwepped away.

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There’s a fine line between a numerator and a denominator. 

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Ten words, two commas, an exclamation mark

and a period all appeared in court yesterday…

They’re due to be sentenced next week.

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The other day, an attendant stopped me in a hospital car park to tell me,

“You can’t park here. It’s badge holders only.”

I replied, “But I have got a bad shoulder.”

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Do you think “Gone With The Wind”

started out as just a draft?

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I was pulled over by the police today.

“How fast do you think you were going, sir?”

“60mph?” I asked.

“Try 135,” the officer replied.

So I shut the door and drove as fast as I could.

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The French are concerned that 77% of their electricity comes from nuclear power.

I think they should stop over-reacting.

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I’m scared of trampolines.

They make me jump.

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At last I’ve found out the reason that women ask so many questions.

Apparently they have an extra why chromosome.

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Those Of A Nervous Disposition Should Look Away Now

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Yes, those of a nervous disposition should indeed look away now, because today we have the penultimate list of irrational fears and phobias that seem to afflict certain members of the population. How and why they develop such curious mental afflictions I don’t. They are real to them, but foolish and amusing to the rest of us.

Today is ‘Q’, ‘R’ and ‘S’.

Enjoy.

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Quadraphobia ……….fear of the number four.

 

Quadriplegiphobia ……….fear of quadriplegics or fear of becoming a quadriplegic.

 

Quintaphobia ……….fear of the number five.

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Radiophobia ……….fear of radiation, x-rays.

 

Ranidaphobia ……….fear of frogs.

 

Rectophobia ……….fear of rectum or rectal diseases.

 

Rhabdophobia ……….fear of being severely punished or beaten by a rod, or of being severely criticized. Also fear of magic.(wand)

 

Rhypophobia ……….fear of defecation.

 

Rhytiphobia ……….fear of getting wrinkles.

 

Rupophobia ……….fear of dirt.

 

Russophobia ……….fear of Russians.

 

Samhainophobia ……….fear of Halloween.

 

Sarmassophobia ……….fear of love play. (Malaxophobia)

 

Satanophobia ……….fear of Satan.

 

Scabiophobia ……….fear of scabies.

 

Scatophobia ……….fear of fecal matter.

 

Scelerophibia ……….fear of bad men, burglars.

 

Sciaphobia or Sciophobia or Sciaphobia ……….fear of shadows.

 

Scoleciphobia ……….fear of worms.

 

Scolionophobia ……….fear of school.

 

Scopophobia or Scoptophobia ……….fear of being seen or stared at.

 

Scotomaphobia ……….fear of blindness in visual field.

 

Scotophobia ……….fear of darkness. (Achluophobia)

 

Scriptophobia ……….fear of writing in public.

 

Selachophobia ……….fear of sharks.

 

Selaphobia ……….fear of light flashes.

 

Selenophobia ……….fear of the moon.

 

Seplophobia ……….fear of decaying matter.

 

Sesquipedalophobia ……….fear of long words.

 

Sexophobia ……….fear of the opposite sex. (Heterophobia)

 

Siderodromophobia ……….fear of trains, railroads or train travel.

 

Siderophobia ……….fear of stars.

 

Sinistrophobia ……….fear of things to the left or left-handed.

 

Sinophobia ……….fear of Chinese, Chinese culture.

 

Sitophobia or Sitiophobia ……….fear of food or eating. (Cibophobia)

 

Snakephobia ……….fear of snakes. (Ophidiophobia)

 

Soceraphobia ……….fear of parents-in-law.

 

Social Phobia ……….fear of being evaluated negatively in social situations.

 

Sociophobia ……….fear of society or people in general.

 

Somniphobia ……….fear of sleep.

 

Sophophobia ……….fear of learning.

 

Soteriophobia ……….fear of dependence on others.

 

Spacephobia ……….fear of outer space.

 

Spectrophobia ……….fear of specters or ghosts.

 

Spermatophobia or Spermophobia ……….fear of germs.

 

Spheksophobia ……….fear of wasps.

 

Stasibasiphobia or Stasiphobia ……….fear of standing or walking. (Ambulophobia)

 

Staurophobia ……….fear of crosses or the crucifix.

 

Stenophobia ……….fear of narrow things or places.

 

Stygiophobia or Stigiophobia ……….fear of hell.

 

Suriphobia ……….fear of mice.

 

Symbolophobia ……….fear of symbolism.

 

Symmetrophobia ……….fear of symmetry.

 

Syngenesophobia ……….fear of relatives.

 

Syphilophobia ……….fear of syphilis.

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The Supernatural Dog That Could Not Be Stopped!

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

 

Cry “Havoc,” and let slip the dogs of war.

William Shakespeare, ‘Julius Caesar’, Act 3 scene 1

 

I started off today’s blog with a post in mind that was a bit of a follow on to yesterday’s tale about Oscar the cat, but as I gathered my thoughts together another story came to mind which I will share with you first. You’ll get the other tomorrow, all being well. I’m sure you can hardly wait :o)

I was reminded about a friend of mine called Donald. Every time I spoke to Donald he was making arrangements for me to go to his house or him to come to mine. The arrangements very seldom seemed to come off, and I knew why. You see Donald was terrified of dogs, I mean petrified, and consequently always made some sort of excuse for not turning up.

One day, however, he did, along with a mate of his called Harry, who had no such intense fears. They always phoned in advance to make sure I would be at home so I knew about the visit and was prepared.

In our house at that time the front door opened into a fairly large hall. Off the hall, directly facing the front door and slightly to the left, there was a corridor, and separating the two was a mahogany ‘Georgian’ type door, which instead of being solid wood is made in the form of a window to take small glass panes, in this case about about seven inches wide by about nine long.

Why is this important? Well, because normal people in a normal house would have the ‘Georgian’ door glazed, either with clear or ornamental glass, or sometimes a bit of both. However, in my house I hadn’t done any glazing, not because I hadn’t gotten around to it which would usually be the case, but because when it was glazed it made a solid barrier and I couldn’t hear anyone at the front door.

So, as I was saying, Donald and Harry duly arrived. I was prepared and the dog was in the study down the hall, not able to get to the front door, which I opened and let the two guys into the hall.

As I let them in I was all the while reassuring Donald that the dog was down in the study and the door connecting the corridor to the hall was firmly shut so there was no need to worry.

Not quite taking my word for it, Donald’s head peered slowly round the front door, survey the landscape and seeing that the adjoining door was indeed shut got a boost of confidence and courage and walked manly-like into the hall.

We only had to go three or four steps and we were in the sitting room, but then fate took a hand.

The dog heard the strange voices and came to investigate. First he stuck his head around the study door and took a good look at the strangers. The strangers in turn, particularly Donald took an even better look at him and for about a second, maybe two, that was all that happened.

Then the dog decided he needed a closer look and walked towards the door. To my surprise Donald did the same to get a better look at the dog. Strangely enough he liked dogs, and would even have liked one of his own, but he was just so very, very afraid of them.

And then one of those once in a million things happened.

The dog didn’t like the idea of Donald heading in his direction and started to move forwards towards the hall, not running but quite quickly. Until he got to the door, which was firmly closed.

Now you are probably expecting the door to burst open or for the dog to somehow open it. But it was much better than that.

The dog kept on walking towards the door, now starting to bear his teeth a little to emphasize his displeasure at these interlopers in his house. Donald, surprisingly, stood his ground content that he was safe, but only for a couple of seconds, because when the dog got to the door, mysteriously and very ominously for Donald, his head kept on coming into the hall — through the unglazed part of the door that was tightly shut and that poor Donald thought had glass in it.

One and on the dog came. First the nose, then the eyes, then the ears, then the neck, then more of the neck  –  it was all a bit like that scene in Terminator 2 where the liquid metal robot pushes through the locked gate in the mental hospital.

Of course the unglazed panel was far too small to allow the dog’s shoulders and body through, but in Donald’s head there was no time for rational thought, this dog had super powers and could walk through solid objects!

I could partially see the look on Donald’s face. It really was priceless. It had changed from complete confidence, through equally complete disbelief and momentarily he turned his head towards me and his friend Harry with a clear “How can this be? What’s happening? What kind of place is this? Explain it and quick, FFS!” look etched over his face.

But I hadn’t time to answer, not that I could have anyway, I was in stitches laughing at the whole show. Then Donald’s ‘fright & flight’ reaction kicked in and he bolted for the front door clawing furiously at locks and bolts and door handles to get out of this terrifying and inexplicable place.

He never did come back to see me after that!

But did he have some story to tell when he got home.

 

Have you had similar experiences? Send them along. Let the world know what is happening before it is too late.