Do You Have To Fail A Test To Get On These Programs?

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Another round of answers given by less than smart contestants on television and radio quiz shows.

It all makes me wonder what test do you have to do to get on these shows?

And does passing rule you out of taking part in the programs?

Enjoy.

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Q: Name a city in Arizona          

A: Tampa Bay

Q: Someone, living or dead, many people hate  

A: Rodney Dangerfield   

Q: Name a foreign country that you would want to visit  

A: Pakistan

Q: Name a holiday named after a person           

A: January

A: Easter

Q: The perfect dessert for a supermodel           

A: Chocolate Cake

A: Brownies      

Q: The most famous Disney character, other than Mickey Mouse

A: The road runner

Q: Name a city that begins with “San”    

A: Seattle

Q: An occupation requiring a college degree      

A: Vice president          

Q: An animal that starts with “D,” besides “dog”

A: Dragon

A: Dachshund   

Q: Name something people buy to impress other people           

A: Motorhome   

Q: The most enjoyable award show on television           

A ……….Family Feud (She heard “game show”)  

Q: Name a country in Africa      

A: South America

Q: Name something people drink when they have a cold

A: Vick’s

Q: Name a city named after a president 

A: Carson City  

Q: Name a man’s “best friend”  

A: Rubies


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And then I found this. Sorry!

I Don’t Know How They Do It But Every Week They Seem To Get Worse!

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

Yes, I really don’t know how they do it, but every week they do seem to get worse. Where these answers come from or why shall always be a mystery, but they are fun and that’s what we like here, especially on a Monday!

You gotta start the week with a smile 🙂

Enjoy.

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Q: The perfect temperature for an autumn day   

A: 87   

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Q: An important city during colonial times          

A: Virginia

A: New England

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Q: Name something parents yell at their kids to finish    

A: “Get off that computer”

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Q: Name a movie people love to watch at Christmas      

A: Snow White 

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Q: Name a type of fruit found in tarts    

A: Sweet tarts

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Q: Name something you buy by the set 

A: Paper

Q: Name something you buy in a larger size if you have a large family    

A: Jeans

Q: Name something a woman sees that would make her tell her husband to stop the car 

A: A bicycle

Q: The most you could afford to pay for a gallon of gas

A: $20

Q: Name a way you would treat a pet like a human         

A: Take it to the vet

Q: Name something London is famous for        

A: Pasta

Q: Name a famous Australian    

A: Peter Pan    

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Q: The name of a famous sex symbol   

A: Wilma

Q: An invention that has replaced stairs 

A: Wheel

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Q: Name something associated with the show “Who Wants To Be A Millionaire”

A: Bob Barker

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Expect The Worst, It’s Quiz Show Answers Monday!

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Another foray into the hidden shallows of the human mind as shown by the answers some hapless contestants have given on television and radio quiz shows.

Marvel at the stupidity.

And enjoy!

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Q: Name something you might buy that could turn out to be phony        

A: A Horse

panto horse

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Q: Name something that dries up as it gets old  

A: Water

dry water.

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Q: The one thing that the people living near you have that you want        

A: A beautiful wife

neighborhood watch.

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Q: Name something most women wouldn’t be caught leaving the house without  

A: A Tampon

tampons-cartoon.

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Q: Name a body part that gets bigger as people get older         

A: Penis

BeavisButtheadWashington.

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Q: Name a foreign country people vacation in where it would be easy to pack on 10 pounds.      

A: Paris

french fries.

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Q: Which one of the seven dwarfs you most often feel like        

A: Weepy

A: Drowsy

A: Grouchy

The Seven Dwarfs.

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Q: Name a question you hate when people ask it to you 

A: “Are those real?”

Are Those Real?.

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Q: The hardest position to play on a baseball team        

A: Quarterback

baseball-face-cartoon-ball.

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Q: Name a city in the state of Georgia   

A: Alabama

georgia_alabama.

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Q: An excuse you use when stopped for speeding        

A: “I was drinking”

speeding.

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Q: Name something newlyweds share    

A: Underwear    

his n hers underwear.

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Q: Name something you would buy in a stationery store 

A: Water

stationery store1111

Q: Name a question that a gentleman would never ask a lady on a first date       

A: “What color underwear do you wear?”

first date.

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Q: Name a fruit beginning with the letter A         

A: Orange

cartoon-orange.

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They’re At It Again, Confounding All The Laws Of The Intellect – Yes, It’s More Quiz Show Answers!

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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The title of this post says ‘confounding all the laws of the intellect’, and I don’t think that is any exaggeration. These people take questions, often simple questions, run it through what passes for their mind and then out of their mouths come answers that are so far away from correct it is sometimes quite staggering.

Anyhow, enough from me.

Here is the latest selection.

Enjoy.

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Q:  What country does the spiritual leader the Dalai Lama come from 

A:  Scotland.

Q:  What is the currency in India?

A:  Ramadan.

Q:  Skegness is a seaside resort on the coast of which sea:

a) Irish Sea,

b) English Channel,

c) North Sea?

A:  Oh, I know that, you can start writing out the cheque now, Dale. It’s on the east coast, so it must be the Irish Sea.

Q:  Bob Hope was the fifth of how many sons?

A:  Four.

Q:  Which ‘S’ is a kind of whale that can grow up to 80 tonnes? 

A:  Ummm .. .

Q:  It begins with ‘S’ and rhymes with ‘perm’.

A:  Shark.

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Q:  Which literary hunchback lived in Notre Dame and fell in love with Esmeralda 

A:  Nostradamus.

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Q:  What is the capital of Italy 

A: France.

Q:  France is another country. Try again. 

A: Oh, um, Benidorm. 

Q:  Wrong, sorry.

 

Let’s try another question 

Q:  In which country is the Parthenon 

A: Sorry, I don’t know.  

Q:  Just guess a country. 

A: Paris.

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Q:  What’s 11 squared?

A: I don’t know.

Q:  I’ll give you a clue. It’s two ones with a two in the middle.

A: Is it five?

 

Q:  What religion was Guy Fawkes?

A: Jewish. 

Q:  That’s close enough.

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Q:  What was signed to bring World War I to an end in 1918?.

A: Magna Carta?

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Q:  What ‘K’ could be described as the Islamic Bible?

A:  Er…

Q:  It’s got two sylla-bles… Kor…

A:  Blimey?

Q: Ha ha ha, no. The past participle of run…

A:  Silence

Q: Okay, try it another way. Today I run, yesterday I…

A:  Walked?

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Q:  What name is given to the condition where the sufferer can fall asleep at any time?

A:  Nostalgia.

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Q:  In which European country is Mount Etna?

A:  Japan.

Q:  I did say European country… I can let you try again.

A:  Er… Mexico?

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Q:  How long did the Six Day War between Egypt and Israel last?

A:  (long pause) 14 days.

Q:  In which country would you spend shekels?

A:  Holland? 

Q:  Try the next letter of the alphabet.

A:  Iceland? Ireland?

Q:  It’s a bad line. Did you say Israel?

A:  No.

 

Q:  Where is Cambridge University?

A:  Geography isn’t my strong point

Q:  There’s a clue in the title 

A:  Leicester?

 

Q:  Which is the largest Spanish-speaking country in the world?

A:  Barcelona 

Q:  I was really after the name of a country

A:  I’m sorry, I don’t know the name of any countries in Spain

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Q:  Where did the D-Day landings take place?

A:  (after pause): Pearl Harbor?

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Q:  What happened in Dallas on November 22, 1963?

A:  I don’t know, I wasn’t watching it then

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The cast of hit tv series Dallas
The cast of hit television series Dallas

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Dumb Dumb Dumb – Yes, More Quiz Show Answers

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

Dumb was about the only word that could describe today’s lot of quiz show contestants, but even that wasn’t enough so I said it three times (and that went along with the video at the end, who was it said, I like it when a plan comes together).

So here you are.

Hope you find something to make you smile this Monday. I’m away to count me toes.

Enjoy!

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Q:  Which American actor is married to Nicole Kidman

A:  Forrest Gump.

Q:  On which street did Sherlock Holmes live?

A:  Er . . .

Q:  He makes bread .. .

A:  Er . . .

Q:  He makes cakes .. .

A:  Kipling Street?

Q:  Which of these is a city in Germany: Hanoi, Hanover or Hangover?

A:  Hanoi.

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Q:  In what year was President Kennedy assassinated?

A:  Erm .. .

Q: Well, let’s put it this way – he didn’t see 1964.

A:  1965?

Q:  What’s the Prince of Wales’s Christian name?

A:  Err . . .

Q:  Here’s a clue: he was married to Diana.

A:  Err . . .

Q:  It begins with a ‘C’.

A:  No idea.

Q:  What was the name of Tony Blair’s chief spin-doctor who resigned last year?

A:  Iain Duncan Smith.

Q:  Arrange these two groups of letters to form a word – CHED and PIT.

A: Chedpit.

Q:  How many toes would three people have in total?

A:  23.

Q:  I’m looking for an island in the Atlantic whose name includes the letter ‘e’.

A:  Ghana.

Q:  No, listen. It’s an island in the Atlantic Ocean.

A:  New Zealand.

Q:  What is the world’s largest continent?

A:  The Pacific

Q:  Name a film starring Bob Hoskins that is also the name of a famous painting by Leonardo Da Vinci.

A:  Who Framed Roger Rabbit?

Q:  In which European city was the first opera house opened in 1637?

A:  Sydney.

Q:  What was signed to bring World War I to an end in 1918?

A:  Magna Carta.

Q:  What international brand shares its name with the Greek goddess of victory?

A: (after long deliberation): Erm, Kellogg’s?

Q:  Name a book written by Jane Austen.

A:  Charlotte Bronte.

Q:  What is the name of the French-speaking Canadian state?

A:  America? 

A:  Portugal? 

A:  Canada? 

A:  Mexico? 

A:  Italy? 

A:  Spain? 

Q:  How many days in a leap year?

A:  253.

Q:  What is the county town of Kent?

A:  Kentish Town?

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Q:  Who wrote Lord of the Rings?

A:  Enid Blyton

Q:  In which European country are there people called Walloons?

A:  Wales.

Q:  Dizzy Gillespie is famous for playing . .. what?

A:  Basketball.

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It’s More Moronic Madness, Yes, It’s Quiz Show Monday!

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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So how many idiots got elected last week? Not all of them I hope, but I bet there are at least a few intellectually challenged newbees in the corridors of power in Washington. 

On the lighter side, some of those who didn’t make it in politics made it on to television and appeared in quiz shows.

The results are not that much different to some of the dumb things said in Congress (oh, oh, I feel another post forming in my head) so here is a selection to get the week started with a smile.

Enjoy!  

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Q: In craps, what are the numbers you will need to roll an ‘Easy 10’?        

A: What are 9 and 1?    

craps dice

. 111111

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Q: Paul III roared at him, “I have waited 30 years for your services. Now, I’m pope. Can’t I satisfy my desire?”        

A: Who is Lady Godiva?

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Q: If a Japanese “isha” (doctor) asks you to stick out your “shita”, he means this.           

A: What is your behind?

proctologist cartoon

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Q: To get to Wallace, Idaho from Boston, get on I-90 West, and the first one of these you ‘hit’, you’re there.        

A: What is a buffalo?

Buffalo

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Q: 2 of the 3 countries classified as extending across two continents     

A: What are Africa and Europe? 

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Q: The original one of these on Massachusetts’ Little Brewster Island was built in 1716; automation didn’t come until 1998.           

A: What is Kebert Xela?

Kebert Xela 

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Q: [The language that this statement, meaning “I love you guys”, is in:] Yr Wyf I’n Dy Garu Di      

A: What is Klingon?

A:  What is Welsh?       

klingon

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Q: He is the only sitting Vice President since Martin Van Buren to be elected President   

A: Who is Al Gore?

Al Gore cartoon

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Q: This nursery rhyme was based on actual events at a 1900 schoolhouse.         

A: What is ‘There once was a man from Nantucket?’       

There once was a man from Nantucket

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Q: In 2002, an elaborate dinner party was held at No. 10 to celebrate this many years’ reign by Elizabeth II           

A: Who is Tony Blair?   

Tony Blair cartoon

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Q: The Timon puppet in “The Lion King” was inspired by Bunraku, the traditional puppet theatre of this country     

A: What is Africa?        

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Q: Of the 5 permanent members of the UN Security Council, the one that is smallest in size         

A: What is my apartment?         

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Q: George Bernard Shaw called this condition “the greatest of evils and the worst of crimes.”       

A: What is marriage?

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Q: Of Pastism, Presentism or Futurism, the literary movement that began around 1909    

A: What is Modernism?

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Q: According to the old saying, “I scream, you scream, we all scream for…” what?          

A: Jim Beam

Jim Beam

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Q: Franklin D. Roosevelt is found on the head side of what American coin?        

A: $50 Bill

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Q: “If I can make it there, I can make it anywhere.” What city does that describe?

A: Phoenix

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Q: What was the magical item that brought Frosty the Snowman to life? 

A: Corncob pipe

corn cob pipes 

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Q: What vehicle is used in the Tour de France race?       

A: SUVs

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Q: What eye ailment is the more common name for “myopia?”    

A: You think you’re right

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 A myopic video

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Smell My Finger! – It’s Quiz Show Answers Monday

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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I can’t believe how fast this year is going. Another Monday and half way through October. But no matter how much time we put in people don’t seem to be getting any smarter. I think this next selection of quiz show answers proves it yet again.

And it may help to explain the rather odd headline on this post too.

Enjoy!

 

 

Q: Name a talk show host you watch in the daytime        

A: Louie Anderson

 

 

Q: An electric appliance designed to be handheld           

A: Blender

 

 

Q: An animal with more than four legs   

A: Dog

A: Horse

 

 

Q: Name a famous woman who seems to intimidate other men   

A: Barbara Bush

 

 

Q: Name something that can damage a home    

A: A woman

 

 

Q: Name a food that comes in instant form       

A: Asparagus   

 

 

Q: Name something you ask people to smell     

A: Your finger   

 

 

Q: Name something that runs on a track

A: Speakers     

 

 

Q: An instrument used by a doctor        

A: Violin

 

 

Q: Name something in a candy bar, besides chocolate  

A: Candy

 

 

Q: The country with the most intriguing women   

A: Africa

 

 

Q: Name a bad habit that has serious consequences     

A: Picking your nose     

 

 

Q: Name a cartoon character with big ears         

A: Kermit the Frog

 

 

Q: Name something Scotch      

A: Water

 

 

Q: Name a famous Barbara       

A: Barbara Washington

 

 

Q: Name a city that jetsetters visit         

A: Florida

A: Norway

 

 

Q: Name a woman who’s had her breasts supersized     

A: Wonder Woman

 

 

Q: An age where a person would be happy to be carded at a bar

A: 18

 

 

Q: Name something people cheat on     

A: Chicago Bears

 

 

Q: Name something you might find in a manicure set     

A: A wig

 

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