Does The Name Pavlov Ring A Bell?

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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What would Thursdays be without a few puns?

Well, yes, okay it would still be Thursday, but a lot less enjoyable.

So what are you waiting for?

I’m sure you are already salivating at the prospect.

Enjoy!

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My desire to be a dermatologist was only skin deep.

I knew I was destined for osteology.

I could feel it in my bones.

dancing-skeleton-clipart

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There’s been a break in at a local puzzle factory.

Authorities are still trying to piece things together.

puzzle factory logo

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The dead batteries were given out free of charge.

dead-batteries-batteries-free-of-charge-pun

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The hardest time in a man’s life

is between puberty and impotence.

puberty-impotence

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I used to think I was trapped in a woman’s body…

Then I was born.

crying-baby-cartoon

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Never hit a man with glasses.

Hit him with a baseball bat.

baseball bat

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I did some DIY with my step-ladder the other night.

I never really got along with my real ladder.

step ladder

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My Uncle had his tongue shot off during World War II.

He doesn’t talk about it, though.

gagged

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Some people like Pachyderms.

But I find them irrelephant

Pachyderm

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My wife left me because of my obsession with sporting puns.

its a shame really because i wanted to discus it.

discus

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I went to the dentist the other day and he told me that he was sick of hearing puns about his job.

So I told him ‘I had a filling you were going to say that’

I had a filling

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I would prefer it if there were Fuhrer puns about the Nazis, thanks very much.

invasion pun

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Did you hear about the transvestite blues singer?

He woke up one morning and he had the blouse.

the-blues-singer

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I hate when people try to use the word infinity just to be clever.

It annoys me to no end.

infinity

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More Pun Fun Today

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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More pun fun today. It’s amazing how bad a joke you can get away with when there’s a pun or two involved. The evidence can be found below.

Enjoy.

 

 

A man’s home is his castle, in a manor of speaking.

 

Dijon vu – the same mustard as before.

 

Practice safe eating – always use condiments.

 

Is a shotgun wedding a case of wife or death?

 

A man needs a mistress just to break the monogamy.

 

A hangover is the wrath of grapes.

 

Dancing cheek-to-cheek is really a form of floor play.

 

Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?

 

Reading while sunbathing makes you well red.

 

When two egotists meet, it’s always an I for an I.

 

A bicycle can’t stand on its own because it is two tired.

 

What’s the definition of a will? (It’s a dead giveaway.)

 

She was engaged to a boyfriend with a wooden leg but broke it off.

 

A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.

 

With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress.

 

The man who fell into an upholstery machine is fully recovered.

 

They tried to save him with an I.V. but it was all in vein.

 

Stir-fry cooks come from all woks of life.

 

Did your hear about the illiterate fisherman who was lost at c?

 

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