General Confusion And Major Disaster.

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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British General Election 2015

No, today’s post is not about matters military, although the term ‘SNAFU’ would be rather appropriate.

This one is about the General Election in Britain in May 2015 that will decide who will run the country for the next five years and who will be Prime Minister. This is a crucial election for voters because there is no real front runner. One party is as bad as the other. So a few votes here and there could make a crucial difference. Sounds a bit like Florida!

It may even end up with another coalition government in Britain, although I don’t know if the Conservatives could stomach another five years of being tied to the Liberals – but what am I talking about, of course they could, if it meant clinging on to power.

The election might be even closer than it should be because millions of people may be unable to vote. The secretive Whitehall department of stupid bureaucrats responsible for – wait for the irony, “efficiency” – refused to heed warnings from its own pilot programs that showed it had major problems with data matching.

data matching

It is very similar to the way the nerds at Microsoft didn’t believe their testers when they told them Windows 8 was a pile of doo-doo.

The bureaucrats first of all created new legal requirements for voter registration requiring them to verify information that was previously taken on trust.

The only thing is, about five and a half million voters went missing from the Electoral Register. The tests they carried out told them this was likely to happen, but they didn’t listen. Bureaucrats never do until it is too late.

According to government sources, “The digital service allows anyone to register to vote online, from any device connected to the web. It’s incredibly quick and simple – it takes less than five minutes.”

They forgot to add the crucial line that – it doesn’t work.

The problems became apparent as soon as the web service went live. The Electoral Register was a lot shorter than it had been. Not only that but strange things also began to happen.

cartoon boy

For example, a five-year-old boy in Crewe had been given the vote – but he couldn’t get off the Electoral Register, because he was not able to produce his National Insurance number, which of course he didn’t have – because he was only five. Duhh!!!

In another case a woman, who had been an eligible voter on the Electoral Roll for twenty years, failed to get on to the new one because her National Insurance number was in her maiden name which did not match with her married name which the system insisted she use now.

The whole thing has turned into a government-created mess. People are now filling in the registration form thinking that means they are registered to vote, but actually they haven’t. All they have managed to do is submit an application to register to vote.

It’s bit like filling in a form so that you are eligible to fill in a form. A bureaucrat’s dream!

So it’s looking like general confusion and major disaster for the election. Just more proof that government bureaucrats and computer systems just don’t belong together.

bureaucrats and computer systems

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Fun Fact File Day!!!

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Yes, welcome to another fun fact file day when the fasab archives are opened up to reveal a startling array of random facts that you probably didn’t know and didn’t need to.

But here they are anyhow.

I hope you enjoy.

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did you know2

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During your lifetime,

you will eat about 60,000 pounds of food,

that’s the weight of about 6 elephants.

Cartoon Elephant Clip Art

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Einstein couldn’t speak fluently when he was nine.

His parents thought he might be retarded.

But he turned out to be relatively smart!

Young_Einstein

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Gilligan of Gilligan’s Island had a first name

that was only used once, on the never-aired pilot show.

His first name was Willy.

The skipper’s real name on Gilligan’s Island is Jonas Grumby.

It was mentioned once in the first episode

on their radio’s newscast about the wreck.

gilligans-island-320

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If you toss a penny 10,000 times,

it will not be heads 5,000 times, but more like 4,950.

The heads picture weighs more, so it ends up on the bottom.

Lincoln_Penny_Obverse

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In 1983, a Japanese artist made a copy of the Mona Lisa

completely out of toast.

toastier-lisa

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Penguins can jump as high as 6 feet in the air.

(But only when you really surprise them!)

penguin jump

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The average bank teller loses about $250 every year.

The average bank CEO loses at least $1 billion – and gets a bonus for doing it!)

bank teller

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The Earth weighs around

6,588,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 tons.

atlas

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The name for Oz in the “Wizard of Oz”

was thought up when the creator, Frank Baum,

looked at his filing cabinet and saw A-N, and O-Z,

hence “Oz.”

2 drawer filing cabinet

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The reason firehouses have circular stairways

is from the days of yore when the engines were pulled by horses.

The horses were stabled on the ground floor

and figured out how to walk up straight staircases.

firehouse stairs

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The Sanskrit word for “war” means “desire for more cows.”

cartoon-dairy-cows

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The word “Checkmate” in chess

comes from the Persian phrase “Shah Mat,”

which means “the king is dead”.

checkmate

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The word “modem” is a contraction

of the words “modulate, demodulate.”

(MOdulate DEModulate)

modem

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Thomas Edison, lightbulb inventor,

was afraid of the dark.

Thomas Edison

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Two-thirds of the world’s eggplant is grown in New Jersey.

eggplant

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Wilma Flintstone’s maiden name was Wilma Slaghoopal,

and Betty Rubble’s maiden name was Betty Jean Mcbricker.

betty_wilma2

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Mars is the home of Olympus Mons,

the largest known volcano in our solar system

Olympus Mons v Everest
Size comparison – Olympus Mons v Everest

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There are six million parts in the Boeing 747-400.

Landing-of-a-Boeing-747-400

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Japanese research has concluded that

moderate drinking can boost IQ levels

(Sometimes you just know when scientific results are accurate.)

Drinks-4

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In 1960 there were 16,067 gambling slots in Nevada.

By the end of the century, 1999, this number rose to 205,726 slots

which would be one slot for every 10 people residing there.

slot machines

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