“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”
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One would hope that libraries, being depositories of knowledge, would be a place relatively safe from the intellectually challenged.
Sadly, stupid people invade every space, libraries included.
To prove the point here is a short selection of actual stupid questions asked of librarians.
Enjoy.
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“Do you have books here?”
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“Do you have a list of all the books written in the English language?”
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“Do you have a list of all the books I’ve ever read?”
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“I’m looking for Robert James Waller’s book, ‘Waltzing through Grand Rapids.”
(The actual title is “Slow Waltz In Cedar Bend.”)
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“Where is the reference desk?”
(Asked of a worker sitting at a desk, over which was a sign saying ‘REFERENCE DESK’.)
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“Can you tell me why so many famous Civil War battles were fought on National Park sites?”
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“Which outlets in the library are appropriate for my hairdryer?”
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“I was here about three weeks ago looking at a cookbook that cost $39.95. Do you know which one it is?”
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“I need a color photograph of George Washington.”
(Other individuals asked for, by other patrons, are Christopher Columbus, King Arthur, Moses, Socrates, and more.)
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“Do you have any books with photographs of dinosaurs?”
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“I’m looking for information on carpal tunnel syndrome. I think I’m having trouble with it in my neck.”
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“Is the basement upstairs?”
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“I am looking for a list of laws that I can break that would send me back to jail for a couple of months.”
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“I got a quote from a book I turned in last week but I forgot to write down the author and title. It’s big and red, and I found it on the top shelf. Can you find it for me?”
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“Do you have anything good to read?”
The response was,
“No, ma’am. I’m afraid we have 75,000 books, and they’re all duds.”
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Dumbass: “I am looking for a globe of the earth.”
Librarian: “We have a table-top model over here.”
Dumbass: “No, that’s not good enough. Don’t you have a life-size?”
Librarian: (pause) “Yes, but it’s in use right now.”
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And finally a joke.
Man goes up to the library reference desk and asks the assistant,
“Do you have a copy of that new book for men with small penises?”
The librarian replies,
“I don’t think it’s in yet.”
“Yes,” the man says. “That’s the one!”
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fasab 