Happy Thanksgiving 2014.

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Today is the fourth Thursday of November and also the last Thursday in November so whether you think Lincoln was right or Roosevelt was right, it still Thanksgiving Day in the USA.

To everyone who participates, enjoy the family holiday, eat too much and drink too much.

Last year I did what turned out to be a very popular post called “I Had To Post A Few Turkey Puns Today, Of Course They Are Fowl” ( Click here if you would like to read it.) And this year I’ve done it again.

So here are some more really bad jokes.

Enjoy or endure.

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rofl

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Thanksgiving,

the time of year when turkeys

fatten Americans up for Christmas!

funny-happy-thanksgiving-turkey-poster

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Why didn’t the Pilgrim want to make the stuffing?

Because it’s such a crummy job!

turkey-thanksgiving-jokes

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What happened when the turkey got into a fight?

He got the stuffing knocked out of him.

funny-turkey

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What kind of music did the Pilgrims like?

Plymouth Rock, of course!

Plymouth Rock

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What would you get if you crossed

a turkey with a baked fruit dessert?

A peach gobbler!

funny turkey photo

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What’s the best dance to do on Thanksgiving?

The turkey trot

turkey trot

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What does a Turkey drink wine in?

In a gobble-let

Turkey drink wine

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What did baby corn say to mama corn?

Where’s popcorn?

turkey eating popcorn cartoon

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Why did the turkey sit on the tomahawk?

To try to hatchet!

tomahawk

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Teacher: “What did the Indians bring

to the first Thanksgiving?”

Student: “Baseballs.”

Teacher: “Baseballs?”

Student: “Yeah,

they were Cleveland Indians!”

Logo_Cleveland Indians

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Who is the turkey’s favorite movie star?

Gregory Peck.

thanksgiving_bush

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If you divide the circumference

of a pumpkin by its diameter

Do you end up with

Pumpkin pi?

pumpkin pie pi

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Can a turkey jump higher than

the Empire State Building?

Yes of course it can

– a building can’t jump at all.

unfriends-me-on-facebook

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Why did the pilgrim’s pants keep falling down?

Because his buckle was on his hat!

pilgrim

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And finally,

instead of talking turkey,

let’s hear someone sing turkey instead.

Take it away Dickie Stickhead

(Phew, you have to be careful how you say that name!)

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I Had To Post A Few Turkey Puns Today, Of Course They Are Fowl.

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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A very happy Thanksgiving to all in America who read this.

I hope everyone everywhere, not just in America, is getting into the spirit of the day and giving thanks for the many good things in their lives.

But Thanksgiving or not, it’s still pun day. A little different today in that there is a mixture of pictorial puns with a distinct nautical theme and, of course, puns with a Thanksgiving theme too.

Enjoy!

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rofl

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What does a turkey like to eat on Thanksgiving?

Nothing; they are already stuffed.

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picture pun 001 Seas The Day

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Why did the turkey cross the road?

To show that he wasn’t chicken.

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picture pun 002 Aqua Holic

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Why is a turkey similar to a ghost?

Because it’s a-gobblin.

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picture pun 003 Cirrhosis Of The River

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Why did the Pilgrim kill the turkey?

Because he was in a fowl mood.

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picture pun 004 Aboat Time

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Or, as the turkey said to the Pilgrim,

“You’re a no-good baster.”

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picture pun 005 Pier Pressure

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Why are turkeys so good at arithmetic?

Because they count the number of chopping days until Thanksgiving.

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picture pun 006 Piece Of Ship

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Why did the turkey bolt down his food?

Because she was a gobbler.

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picture pun 007 Nautibuoy

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Did you hear about the conservative turkey?

It has two right wings.

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picture pun 008 Ship For Brains

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As the leftover turkey said after it was wrapped up and refrigerated,

“Foiled again.”

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picture pun 009 Sex Sea

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If April showers bring May flowers what do May flowers bring?

Pilgrims!

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picture pun 010 Deep Ship

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What sound does a space turkey make?

Hubble, hubble, hubble.

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picture pun 011 Pugboat

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Which side of the turkey has the most feathers?

The outside!

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picture pun 012 Sails Call

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What can you never eat for Thanksgiving dinner?

Breakfast or lunch!

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picture pun 013 The Codfather

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Thanksgiving:

when turkeys turn from gobblers to gobblees.

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picture pun 014 Moor Often Than Knot

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Did you hear about the waiter

who dropped a Thanksgiving dinner on the floor

and feared he had created an international incident?

It was the downfall of Turkey,

the ruin of Greece,

and the breaking up of China.

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