The ‘F’ Word And More – It’s Fasab Fact Day!

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Don’t be offended by the title.

An ‘F’ word here or there never hurt anyone.

So get stuck into the facts (that’s an ‘F’ word too!)

Enjoy.

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who is afraid of the 'F' word

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In 2011 approximately one third

of divorce filings in the US

contained the ‘F’ word,

yes, that’s the one

“facebook”.

(See, it wasn’t nearly

as bad as you thought.)

facebook divorce evidence

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HOT fact:

The temperature of the Earth’s core is

5500 degrees celsius (9900 degrees fahrenheit).

That is the same temperature as the surface of the sun.

temperature of the Earth's core

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Getting a silver medal in the Olympics

will make you feel worse than getting a bronze

(because you just missed the gold)

silver medal in the Olympics London 2012

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There is actually a beer brewed

from bananas in some countries

beer brewed from bananas

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Out of 44 Presidents of the United States,

32 have served in the military.

15 Presidents served in the Army/Army Reserve,

9 served in state militias,

6 served in the Navy/Naval Reserve

and 2 served in the Continental Army.

President Reagan Military Service

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Croatian Josip Belušic invented the speedometer.

(How about that for a fast fact?)

Josip Belušic

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Answering the call of nature is something

Europeans usually associate with the utmost privacy,

which is why American toilets,

with huge bottom and side gaps,

seem so weird to some foreigners.

American toilets

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The first webcam was actually created

to monitor a coffee pot at

the University of Cambridge.

first webcam

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Russian spies used to use hollow coins

to pass messages to each other in the US

and one of these coins made it into circulation.

One day a paperboy dropped the coin

and it split open revealing its coded contents.

The code baffled the FBI and CIA

until a Russian spy defected to the US

and interpreted the note.

It was a welcome message from Moscow

…and it was intended for him.

hollow coins to pass messages

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In Australia there is a river

called the ‘Never Never River’.

Never Never River

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The toaster in your kitchen

contains a more powerful computer

than the one used by NASA

to send astronauts to the moon.

It only had 64Kbyte of memory

and operated at 0.043MHz.

toaster

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After the release of the Top Gun movie in 1986,

the US Navy stated that the number of

young men who wanted to become Naval Aviators

went up by 500 percent.

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Tin Foil, Mince Pies And Kilts? It’s The Quiz!

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Welcome to another fasab quiz.

Last one for this month. And the usual random mixture to test your general knowledge.

Also as usual if you get stuck you can find the answers waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay down below, but please NO cheating!

Enjoy and good luck.

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quiz7

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Q.  1:  What is kitchen tin foil made from?

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Q.  2:  With what would you ‘rock the baby’ or ‘walk the dog’?

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Q.  3:  What is the main ingredient of a mince pie?

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Q.  4:  Where was the Titanic built?

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Q.  5:  How many best director Oscars did Alfred Hitchcock win?

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Q.  6:  What is feldspar?

            a)  a flower            b)  a type of coral            c)  a mineral

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Q.  7:  What mineral is an ‘Alaskan diamond’?

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Q.  8:  Which country owns the island of Bermuda?

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Q.  9:  How many equal angles has a ‘scalene triangle’?

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Q. 10:  What is an ‘ocular contusion’ more commonly known as?

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Q. 11:  What color is the black box on a plane?

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Q. 12:  What property of a body is calculated by multiplying its mass by its velocity?

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Q. 13:  What nation invented the kilt?

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Q. 14:  Meaning before noon, what does the acronym ‘AM’ stand for?

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Q. 15:  ‘Pb’ is the chemical symbol for which element?

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Q. 16:  What was John Lennon’s middle name?

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Q. 17:  The term ‘Lupine’ relates to which animals?

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Q. 18:  What is the difference between an ‘albatross’ and an ‘albacore’?

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Q. 19:  Which part of a man’s body enlarges by up to 8 times when he sees an attractive female?

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Q. 20:  This one is the name of a band of the late 1960s and 1970s and of the English farmer who invented the seed-planting drill in 1701?

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ANSWERS

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Q.  1:  What is kitchen tin foil made from?

A.  1:  Aluminium (US-English: Aluminum).

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Q.  2:  With what would you ‘rock the baby’ or ‘walk the dog’?

A.  2:  A Yoyo.

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Q.  3:  What is the main ingredient of a mince pie?

A.  3:  Fruit.

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Q.  4:  Where was the Titanic built?

A.  4:  Belfast, Ireland.

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Q.  5:  How many best director Oscars did Alfred Hitchcock win?

A.  5:  Remarkably the correct answer is ‘None’.

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Q.  6:  What is feldspar?

            a)  a flower            b)  a type of coral            c)  a mineral

A.  6:  The correct answers is c) a mineral.

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Q.  7:  What mineral is an ‘Alaskan diamond’?

A.  7:  Quartz.

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Q.  8:  Which country owns the island of Bermuda?

A.  8:  Great Britain.

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Q.  9:  How many equal angles has a ‘scalene triangle’?

A.  9:  None. A scalene triangle has 3 unequal sides and angles.

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Q. 10:  What is an ‘ocular contusion’ more commonly known as?

A. 10:  A black eye.

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Q. 11:  What color is the black box on a plane?

A. 11:  The ‘Black’ box is in fact ‘Orange’.

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Q. 12:  What property of a body is calculated by multiplying its mass by its velocity?

A. 12:  Momentum.

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Q. 13:  What nation invented the kilt?

A. 13:  No, not Scotland, the kilt was invented in Ireland.

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Q. 14:  Meaning before noon, what does the acronym ‘AM’ stand for?

A. 14:  Ante meridian.

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Q. 15:  ‘Pb’ is the chemical symbol for which element?

A. 15:  Lead.

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Q. 16:  What was John Lennon’s middle name?

A. 16:  Winston.

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Q. 17:  The term ‘Lupine’ relates to which animals?

A. 17:  Wolves.

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Q. 18:  What is the difference between an ‘albatross’ and an ‘albacore’?

A. 18:  An albatross is a bird and an albacore is a fish.

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Q. 19:  Which part of a man’s body enlarges by up to 8 times when he sees an attractive female?

A. 19:  The pupil of his eye (Oh, come on, you should be so lucky!).

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Q. 20:  This one is the name of a band of the late 1960s and 1970s and of the English farmer who invented the seed-planting drill in 1701?

A. 20:  Jethro Tull.

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These Quizzes Might Not Quite Be Legend, But Today One Of The Questions Is!

Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Yes indeed, today one of the questions is legend.

So get your thinking caps on and have a go.

And remember if you get stuck you can find all the answers waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay down below, but please NO cheating!

Enjoy and good luck.

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quiz 05

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Q.  1: George Washington was the first President of the United States of America, who was the second?

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Q.  2:  Barbie’s friend Ken has a last name, what is it?

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Q.  3:  Most of us have played the board game “Monopoly”, but can you name the six tokens available to the players? (And yes, you get a point for each correct answer.)

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Q.  4:  Which capital city is also the name of a very hot spice used in the kitchen?

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Q.  5:  American writer Richard Matheson’s 1954 novel called “I Am Legend” was adapted for a movie of the same name in 2007 starring Will Smith. But this was the third adaptation of the novel, what were the first two and what were the names of the actors in the starring roles? (A point for the name of each movie and further points if you can name the starring actors.)

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Q.  6:  The world was declared safe from which virus in 1979, after it had killed more than one billion people?

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Q.  7:  What is the second highest mountain in the world?

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Q.  8:  Which famous World War II general, who just before retreating from the Philippines in 1942 said, “We shall return”?

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Q.  9:  Which Colombian city was notorious for being the center of the cocaine smuggling business, the drug cartel responsible even taking the name?

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Q. 10:  Which island did Turkish troops invade in 1974?

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Q. 11:  The 25th President of the USA had the highest peak in North America named after him, what was his name?

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Q. 12:  Who was the British actress who starred in the epic movie “Gone With The Wind” and what part did she play? (A point for each correct answer.)

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Q. 13:  What was the name of the national airline of Belgium that operated from 1923 until bankruptcy forced its cessation in 2001?

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Q. 14:  Much in the news currently, what is the capital city of Ukraine?

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Q. 15:  Josip Broz led the Communist partisans to victory against foreign occupation forces in Yugoslavia during the Second World War. By what name was he later better known?

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Q. 16:  What was the name of the seafaring people based in Scandinavia, who raided, traded, explored, and settled in wide areas of Europe, Asia, and the North Atlantic islands, from the late 8th to the mid-11th centuries?

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Q. 17:  What is the name of the Japanese delicacy consisting of very fresh raw meat or fish sliced into thin pieces?

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Q. 18:  Which Russian word meaning “Speaking Aloud” was a policy of Mikhail Gorbachev in order to liberalize various aspects of Soviet life?

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Q. 19:  Who was the South African surgeon who carried out the first heart transplant operation?

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Q. 20:  Which famous singer songwriter and guitarist from the 1950s had his most famous hit, and only number one recording, in the 1970s with his ding-a-ling?

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ANSWERS

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Q.  1: George Washington was the first President of the United States of America, who was the second?

A.  1:  John Adams.

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Q.  2:  Barbie’s friend Ken has a last name, what is it?

A.  2:  It’s Carson, the little dude’s full name is Ken Carson!

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Q.  3:  Most of us have played the board game “Monopoly”, but can you name the six tokens available to the players? (And yes, you get a point for each correct answer.)

A.  3:  The Monopoly tokens are a Battleship, a Boot, a Dog, a Flat Iron, a Racing Car, and a Top Hat.

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Q.  4:  Which capital city is also the name of a very hot spice used in the kitchen?

A.  4:  Cayenne (French Guyana).

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Q.  5:  American writer Richard Matheson’s 1954 novel called “I Am Legend” was adapted for a movie of the same name in 2007 starring Will Smith. But this was the third adaptation of the novel, what were the first two and what were the names of the actors in the starring roles? (A point for the name of each movie and further points if you can name the starring actors.)

A.  5:  The first big screen adaptation of the novel was “The Last Man on Earth” (1964) which starred Vincent Price, and the second adaptation was “The Omega Man” (1971) starring Charlton Heston.

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Q.  6:  The world was declared safe from which virus in 1979, after it had killed more than one billion people?

A.  6:  Smallpox.

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Q.  7:  What is the second highest mountain in the world?

A.  7:  Located Pakistan, “K2” (also known as Chhogori/Qogir, Ketu/Kechu, and Mount Godwin-Austen) is the second-highest mountain in the world with a peak elevation of 6,811 meters (28,251 feet).

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Q.  8:  Which famous World War II general, who just before retreating from the Philippines in 1942 said, “We shall return”?

A.  8:  General Douglas MacArthur.

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Q.  9:  Which Colombian city was notorious for being the center of the cocaine smuggling business, the drug cartel responsible even taking the name?

A.  9:  Medellin, now thankfully a much more peaceful place.

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Q. 10:  Which island did Turkish troops invade in 1974?

A. 10:  Cyprus.

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Q. 11:  The 25th President of the USA had the highest peak in North America named after him, what was his name?

A. 11:  William McKinley.

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Q. 12:  Who was the British actress who starred in the epic movie “Gone With The Wind” and what part did she play? (A point for each correct answer.)

A. 12:  Vivien Leigh, who played Scarlett O’Hara.

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Q. 13:  What was the name of the national airline of Belgium that operated from 1923 until bankruptcy forced its cessation in 2001?

A. 13:  Best known internationally by the acronym Sabena (SABENA), which is the answer I’m looking for, it was The Societé Anonyme Belge d’Exploitation de la Navigation Aérienne, or Belgian Corporation for Air Navigation Services.

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Q. 14:  Much in the news currently, what is the capital city of Ukraine?

A. 14:  Kiev.

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Q. 15:  Josip Broz led the Communist partisans to victory against foreign occupation forces in Yugoslavia during the Second World War. By what name was he later better known?

A. 15:  President Tito.

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Q. 16:  What was the name of the seafaring people based in Scandinavia, who raided, traded, explored, and settled in wide areas of Europe, Asia, and the North Atlantic islands, from the late 8th to the mid-11th centuries?

A. 16:  They were called Vikings or Norsemen, take a point if you gave either answer.

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Q. 17:  What is the name of the Japanese delicacy consisting of very fresh raw meat or fish sliced into thin pieces?

A. 17:  Sashimi. (Not Sushi, which includes cooked vinegared rice.)

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Q. 18:  Which Russian word meaning “Speaking Aloud” was a policy of Mikhail Gorbachev in order to liberalize various aspects of Soviet life?

A. 18:  Glasnost.

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Q. 19:  Who was the South African surgeon who carried out the first heart transplant operation.

A. 19:  Dr Christian Barnard.

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Q. 20:  Which famous singer songwriter and guitarist from the 1950s had his most famous hit, and only number one recording, in the 1970s with his ding-a-ling?

A. 20:  Chuck Berry, have a listen….

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One For The Rod

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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How about a short story of love, betrayal, and revenge to end the week?

Enjoy.

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The divorce had just become final and she was preparing to remove all her remaining belongings from what had been “their” house.

On the first day, she sadly packed her belongings into boxes, crates and suitcases.

On the second day, she had the movers come and collect her things.

On the third day, she sat down for the last time at their beautiful dining-room table, by candle-light. She put on some soft background music, and feasted on a pound of shrimp, a jar of caviar, and a bottle of spring-water.

When she had finished, she went into each and every room and deposited a few half-eaten shrimps dipped in caviar into the hollow centre of the curtain rods.

Then she cleaned up the kitchen and left.

On the fourth day, her ex-husband came back to the house with his new girlfriend, and at first all was bliss.

Then, slowly, the house began to smell.

They tried everything; cleaning, mopping, and airing-out the place.

smellyhouse2

Vents were checked for dead rodents, and carpets were steam cleaned.

Air fresheners were hung everywhere.

Exterminators were brought in to set off gas canisters, during which time the two had to move out for a few days.

In the end they even paid to replace the expensive wool carpeting.

Nothing worked!

People stopped coming over to visit.

Repairmen refused to work in the house.

The maid quit.

smellyhouse1

Finally, the ex and his new girl couldn’t take the stench any longer, and decided they had to move.

But a month later – even though they’d cut their price in half – they couldn’t find a buyer for such a stinky house.

Word got out, and eventually even the local realtors refused to return their calls.

Finally, unable to wait any longer for a purchaser, they had to borrow a huge sum of money from the bank to buy a new place.

It was then that she called her ex-husband and asked how things were going.

He told her the saga of the rotting house.

She listened politely and said that she missed her old home terribly and would be willing to reduce her divorce settlement in exchange for having the house.

He was so desperate to get rid of the unsaleable house, that he agreed on a price that was only 1/10 th of what the house had been worth.

And because he knew she could have no idea how bad the smell really was, he wasn’t going to give her any time to visit the place again.

The deal was good only if she would sign the papers that very day!

She agreed.

Within two hours his lawyers delivered the completed paperwork which she duly signed.

A week later her ex-husband and his girlfriend stood smiling as they watched the moving company pack everything to take to their new home…….

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……and to spite the ex-wife, they even took the curtain rods too!

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Aren’t happy endings just great?

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Is A Plateau A High Form Of Flattery?

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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You guessed it.

It’s pun day!

Time to love or hate another selection of bad jokes dressed up as word play.

Enjoy!

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Son, “Dad, what’s an antidepressant?”

Father, “It’s your Mums fat sister after she’s weighed herself.”

antidepressant

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I took my tomcats to get neutered today.

No hard felines.

cat

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I am writing a TV program about a woman in the 19th century

who suffered painfully during her time of the month.

It’s a period drama.

period drama

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I joined a club called Amnesiacs Anonymous.

I can’t remember why.

amnesiacs anonymous meeting

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I’ve been trying to come up with a pun about fabrics.

But it’s nylon impossible.

nylon-poster-web

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Sign on the maternity hospital delivery room door.

“PUSH PUSH PUSH”

push push push

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I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah.

I thought – he’s trying to pull a fast one

cheetah

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What is the first thing a cowboy says when he walks into a German car showroom?

“Audi!”

audi

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He often broke into song because he couldn’t find the key.

key

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It was somehow inevitable that the Breast Enlargement company would go bust.

bust

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I can always count on my wife to put things into “hysterical” perspective…

stressed-woman-cartoon

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What do you call a very fat psychic?

A four chin teller.

four chin teller

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The chef was surprised when a dessert came back to the kitchen.

It was a boo meringue.

boo meringues

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A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel

and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories.

After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse.

“But why?” they asked, as they moved off.

“Because”, he said, “I can’t stand chess-nuts boasting in an open foyer.”

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I know it’s not Christmas, but….

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Congratulations! You’ve Won Nothing At All. How Could You With Answers Like These?

 “Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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It is a continual mystery to me why people who are so obviously dumb enter pressure competitions on television thinking they will win something. But they do try. And the only prize they get is to end up on blogs like this.

Get out the whipped cream and enjoy!

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Q: Name a car known by its initials        

A: Corvette       

 

 

Q: Name something you keep in a kitchen canister         

A: Cans           

 

 

Q: Name a reason a man might take his toupee off        

A: To show off  

 

 

Q: Name a state with good skiing          

A: Florida         

 

 

Q: Name a word that rhymes with “cookie”         

A: Nookie         

 

 

Q: If someone tells you a secret, how many people do you tell? 

A: Five 

 

 

Q: Name something you hope your husband never loses           

A: His pants     

 

 

Q: Name something most people have only one of        

A: One set of grandparents

 

 

Q: Name a phrase starting with “Father” 

A: Stepfather    

 

 

Q: Name a fruit used in pies      

A: Squash

 

 

Q: Name a holiday where stores are always busy           

A: Monday       

 

 

Q: Name a type of movie that best describes your love life        

A: Exciting       

 

 

Q: Name something that can be smooth or bumpy         

A: Bread          

 

 

Q: The country that has the best music to dance to, besides the US       

A: Canada

 

 

Q: The one word people yell to their dog           

A: “Here, boy!”

 

 

Q: An occasion when a church might have standing room only.  

A: New Year’s Eve        

 

 

Q: Name a three letter word children first learn to spell   

A: Not  

 

 

Q: Name a country starting with “B”       

A: Bostonia

 

 

Q: One of Oprah’s favorite people        

A: Regis Kelly  

 

 

Q: Name something a woman buys to spice up the romance at home     

A: Whipped cream        

 

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