To Be Fair, It Needs To Stop Raining.

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”


But of course sometimes life isn’t fair.

Sometimes it’s Pun Day.

Enjoy or endure!




Tink my postmn is a thif

My leters keep gong misin

Postman Donald



I asked a French bloke

if he played video games.

He said Wii.

Postman Donald



Chickens don’t have friends.

They only have pen pals.

chickens in pen



I was sent on an anger management course.

Apparently it’s all the rage.




Chewbacca forgets to delete his history before

letting his girlfriend use his computer

….wookie error




My brother takes part in a weather

predicting contest every month.

He’s the raining champion.




I used to know a depressed cross eyed girl…

She never looked forward to anything.

cross eyed girl



There was a knock at the front door.

My wife answered it and said to me

there’s a man at the door with a bald head’‘.

I said ‘‘tell him to get lost, I’ve already got one’

man at the door with a bald head



I’m directing a cowboy movie called ‘The Sun’.

It’s set in the west.

sunset monument valley



My wife just spent $100 getting a bikini wax.

What a flipping rip off.

cartoon bikini wax



Is anyone here called Allen?

I think I found your keys




I’m an alcoholic and have frittered the best 

years of my life away looking at the world

through the bottom of a glass.

All I ask for is another shot.

another shot



There’s a certain stigma attached

to reproduction organs,

especially in flowers.




Three Chinese brothers, Bu, Chu, and Fu,

wanted to illegally live in America.

The brothers decide to change

their names to seem more American.

Bu changed his name to Buck.

Chu changed his name to Chuck.

And Fu got sent back to China.

three Chinese brothers



I went to a Motown reunion last night and

promised myself I wouldn’t suck up to any of the artists…

But The Temptations were there.






Start The Week With An Idiot, Preferably Several – It’s Quiz Show Monday Again!

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”


There are times and places I suppose one shouldn’t laugh, not that I bother too much about that, but one time when it is socially acceptable is on a Monday morning.

Here is your chance to test that out with another selection of ridiculous quiz show answers.




Q: Name something roofs are made of  

A: Chalk stuff



Q: Name something men do when they run out of clean underwear         

A: Turn them inside out 



Q: Name something that people steal from work

A: Cash register



Q: Name a famous Peter          

A: Peter



Q: Name something that finishes the sentence: “You’re slower than…”     

A: Moses         



Q: Name something you feel before you buy it  

A: Excited        



Q: Name something you hope your dog doesn’t do right before he licks your head         

A: Burps          



Q: The ideal daily temperature   

A: 98.6?F         



Q: Name something with claws  

A: Christmas    



Q: Name something you wear two of at the same time   

A: Underwear    



Q: The first thing you take off after work           

A: Underwear



Q: An occasion for which you stayed up all night           

A: Lost virginity



Q: Name something that just you know is going break when its warranty runs out

A: Glass



Q: Name a bird that some people look like when they walk         

A: Dolphin



Q: Name something you hope your husband never loses (asked to 100 married women)  

A: His pants



Q: Name something a woman needs to have before she gets married     

A: A pap smear



Q: Name something babies throw out of their crib          

A: Prayer book 



Q: Name something that gets wet when you use it          

A: Toilet paper  



Q: Name something that guests get hit with on Jerry Springer     

A: Keys           



Q: An occupation that begins with the letter “J”  

A: A jackhammerer



Q: Name something people take to a bath         

A: Duck



Q: Name a letter many words begin with

A: Dear John    



Q: Name something you wish you had one of for each person in your home       

A: A house



Q: Name something office workers turn off at the end of the day           

A: Their brains  



Q: An actor who played a gangster       

A: Al Capone    



Q: Name something you throw away daily          

A: Toilet paper  



Q: Name a place where you take off your clothes, besides home           

A: School



Q: Name something you wash more than once per day   

A: Socks



Q: Name a man’s name that starts with the letter “P”

A: Porcupine



Q: Name something that rhymes with ‘coke’

A: Toke