Why Are Puns So Popular?

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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I’ve been doing puns for a while now and it seems that a lot of other people like them too. I just can’t figure out the reason. I mean the jokes themselves are, to say the least, sometimes contrived and quite bad. Yet people groan, grimace and laugh and come back for more – me included, I’m just not sure why.

If you think you have the answer do let me know.

Meantime enjoy this week’s selection.

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The other day someone left a piece of silly putty in my house. I didn’t know what to make of it.

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My wife has left me because I am a compulsive gambler. I’d do anything to win her back.

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Some people are making Rapture jokes like there’s no tomorrow.

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Tea is for mugs.

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Did you hear about the physics student who couldn’t understand quantum theory? He was thicker than a Planck!

Max Planck (1858 – 1917), German physicist considered the founder of the quantum theory.

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A woman was attacked by a troupe of mime artists. They performed unspeakable acts on her.

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Wind turbines. I’m a big fan.

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NBC News: Two pedestrians die in collision. How fast must they have been walking?

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Don’t you just hate it when people think there clever but use the wrong grammar?

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Iraq drastically needs to reduce its car bomb footprint.

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A book just fell on my head. I’ve only got myshelf to blame.

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“So, how’s life in North Korea?”

“Well, I can’t complain.”

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How do you find a blind man in a nudist colony?  It’s not hard.

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Cocaine is never a solution. Unless, of course, you dissolve it in water.

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I got a phone call from electric company to say my bill was outstanding. I said, “Thanks!”

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I often say to myself, “I can’t believe that cloning machine worked!”

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When my girlfriend said she was leaving because of my obsession with The Monkees, I thought she was joking. And then I saw her face.

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Stick It Where The Sun Don’t Shine, Too!

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

 

So yesterday’s blog post turned out to be about elephant’s bottoms. Who’d have thought? Sometimes these posts are a surprise to me too!

But it seemed to be reasonably popular so as they say, if you’re on a roll….

 

Today we’re in La Grange, Georgia and talking about a guy called Antonio Mendoza, an attorney. I probably shouldn’t have told you that last bit, it might take away some of your sympathy for poor Antonio.

Anyhow, Antonio has a dog. And as dogs have a habit of doing sometimes, it dragged Antonio’s things all over the place. One of the things belonging to Antonio that the dog got hold of was his cel phone which ended up in the shower.

And so did Antonio. One morning he was having a shower but he slipped on a wet tile, tripped on the dog and in his own words “sat down right on the thing”, the thing being his cel phone!

That of itself would probably have been enough to spoil most ordinary people’s day, but Antonio’s phone, like the unfortunate guy’s head yesterday, went right up where the sun don’t shine.

You’d think it couldn’t get much worse than that, but you’d be wrong.

Antonio’s phone was one of those flip phone types and the impact of his fall had managed to flip open the cover up inside his rectum. There was nothing for it but go to the hospital where the delicate extraction took more than three hours.

“He was a real trooper during the entire episode,” said Dr.Dennis Crobe. “Tony just cracked jokes and really seemed to be enjoying himself. Three times during the extraction his phone rang and each time, he made jokes about it that just had us rolling on the floor. By the time we finished, we really did expect to find an answering machine in there.”

 

That’s what can happen if you do it by accident.

 

Have a listen to the consequences if you are really, really and I mean REALLY dumb!