Another Monday Quiz!

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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It’s another Monday quiz, but you are quite at liberty to try it any day of the week that you want.

Some quite easy questions in this selection, but also some that will make you stop and think.

If you get stuck the answers are, as always, waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay down below, but please NO cheating!

Enjoy and good luck.

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Quiz 07

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Q.  1:  What animal sleeps standing up?

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Q.  2:  By what common name is solid carbon dioxide known?

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Q.  3:  The name of what flower means ‘fleshlike’?

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Q.  4:  In golf, what term is given to completing a hole in two under par?

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Q.  5:  This word is the name of a chain of hills or mountains, a Spanish mackerel, and a word used in communications to represent the letter ‘S’, what is it?

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Q.  6:  Which element has the atomic Number 1?

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Q.  7:  What is the distance between the two rails on a railway track called?

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Q.  8:  Mauritius is found in which ocean?

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Q.  9:  Who was the first, and who is the current, President of the Russian Federation? (A point for each correct answer and a bonus point if you name both correctly.)

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Q. 10:  The ‘sackbut’ was a precursor to which musical instrument?

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Q. 11:  Which 1851 novel was first published in Britain under the title ‘The Whale’? (A bonus point is available if you can also correctly name the author.)

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Q. 12:  What is the traditional date for the founding of Rome?

            a)  735BC                b)  753BC               c)  573BC

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Q. 13:  Who painted ‘The Laughing Cavalier’? (You can have a bonus point if you know why he was laughing.)

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Q. 14:  The ‘Spanish Steps’ are found in which city?

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Q. 15:  What type of tree is often found in churchyards?

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Q. 16:  Relating to flat-screen televisions and monitors, what does ‘LCD’ stand for?

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Q. 17:  What is the highest digit that can appear in an ‘Octal’ number system?

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Q. 18:  Which gladiator led a two-year slave revolt against the Romans?

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Q. 19:  In weather, regions of high pressure are also known as what?

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Q. 20:  Who was ‘Dreaming’ about ‘California’ in 1965?

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ANSWERS

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Q.  1:  What animal sleeps standing up?

A.  1:  A horse.

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Q.  2:  By what common name is solid carbon dioxide known?

A.  2:  It is known as ‘Dry Ice’.

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Q.  3:  The name of what flower means ‘fleshlike’?

A.  3:  The carnation.

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Q.  4:  In golf, what term is given to completing a hole in two under par?

A.  4:  It is called an ‘Eagle’.

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Q.  5:  This word is the name of a chain of hills or mountains, a Spanish mackerel, and a word used in communications to represent the letter ‘S’, what is it?

A.  5:  Sierra.

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Q.  6:  Which element has the atomic Number 1?

A.  6:  Hydrogen.

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Q.  7:  What is the distance between the two rails on a railway track called?

A.  7:  It is known as the ‘Gauge’.

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Q.  8:  Mauritius is found in which ocean?

A.  8:  In the Indian Ocean.

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Q.  9:  Who was the first, and who is the current, President of the Russian Federation? (A point for each correct answer and a bonus point if you name both correctly.)

A.  9:  The first President of the Russian Federation was Boris Yeltsin (1991–1999) and the current President is, of course, Vladimir Putin (2nd tenure 2012–present).

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Q. 10:  The ‘sackbut’ was a precursor to which musical instrument?

A. 10:  The trombone.

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Q. 11:  Which 1851 novel was first published in Britain under the title ‘The Whale’? (A bonus point is available if you can also correctly name the author.)

A. 11:  Moby Dick written by Herman Melville.

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Q. 12:  What is the traditional date for the founding of Rome?

            a)  735BC                b)  753BC               c)  573BC

A. 12:  The correct answer is b) 753BC.

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Q. 13:  Who painted ‘The Laughing Cavalier’? (You can have a bonus point if you know why he was laughing.)

A. 13:  The artist was Frans Hals (and I have no idea why the Cavalier was laughing, a well earned bonus point if you do.)

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Q. 14:  The ‘Spanish Steps’ are found in which city?

A. 14:  Rome.

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Q. 15:  What type of tree is often found in churchyards?

A. 15:  The Yew tree.

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Q. 16:  Relating to flat-screen televisions and monitors, what does ‘LCD’ stand for?

A. 16:  Liquid Crystal Display.

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Q. 17:  What is the highest digit that can appear in an ‘Octal’ number system?

A. 17:  7.

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Q. 18:  Which gladiator led a two-year slave revolt against the Romans?

A. 18:  Spartacus.

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Q. 19:  In weather, regions of high pressure are also known as what?

A. 19:  Anticyclones.

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Q. 20:  Who was ‘Dreaming’ about ‘California’ in 1965?

A. 20:  The Mamas & the Papas.

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The Ambassadorks Of America!

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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The Sunday Sermon

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Oh dear where to start. 

I’ve said before that America is bad – that’s capital ‘B’, ‘A’ and ‘D’ – at foreign policy. The US Government should know this by now, I’m not the only one saying it. It is a well known fact all over the world – except in America which apparently doesn’t know very much about the rest of the world and also apparently isn’t going to learn any time soon.

There hasn’t been any time in history when America needed to take stock of what has happened and try to make a few friends out there in the big wide world rather than pissing everyone else off needlessly.

Sure if you’re the biggest and strongest on the field you can kick anyone around. But to what purpose when it’s just as easy to get people on your side. Most of the woes America faces, the rest of the world faces too. There’s more in common out there that you might at first think.

Cue the man who was going to bring in great change and had the power to do so. But, no, President Obama hasn’t changed a damn thing. He inherited a great big hole and he just jumped in there with his shovel and keeps on digging.

Worse, he has yet again allowed croneyism to take the place of innovation and good sense.

To help him he has given government positions to the biggest bunch of idiots that you could ever imagine.

Their first job it seems was to continue to piss off Europe. Hot on the heels of the NSA getting caught spying on German Chancellor Merkel,  the U.S. Secretary of State for European and Eurasian Affairs, Victoria Nuland, was caught in a phone call recording saying “F*** the EU”.

Yes, you read that correctly. And she did all this as she was discussing who should be in the new Ukrainian government. 

Whoops! And Double Whoops!!

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Here it is if you want to hear it for yourselves.

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That’s the Secretary of State.

Now what about the Presidential appointeees, the Ambassadors.

You would think the main criteria for choosing your Ambassadors would be to get someone who has an in depth knowledge of the country where they will be posted. Someone well versed in the culture, history, politics etc. Someone who will fit in straight away and make a good impression on behalf of the American people.

Sound sensible?

Yes, of course it does.

Is it the way America chooses its Ambassadors?

No, of course it’s not.

America chooses its Ambassadors, not on ability, but rather on how much money they have raised for the President’s election or re-election campaign.

That’s what you call corruption in any other country. I’m not sure what it’s called in America but the consequences are plain and pathetic to be seen.

Nowhere better than in the most recent hearings for the ambassador positions.

In this lot of new Ambassadors we had Colleen Bell, a TV producer for a soap opera who was picked as the U.S. envoy to Hungary. Did she know anything about Hungary? No. She didn’t utter a word of sense, just relied on waffle and bluff.

The only thing that eased her humiliation was the new Ambassador to Norway who was so clueless he didn’t even know who was in Government there. He even called the Progress Party, which is part of Norway’s ruling coalition, a hate-spewing “fringe element.”

And last in these examples, but not least in terms of inability and unsuitability for the job, was Noah Bryson Mamet. He was the nominee for the Argentina ambassadorship despite the fact that he’d never even visited that country and can’t speak Spanish.

A couple of million dollars for Obama apparently goes a very long way to getting you the job of representing America on the world stage.

Incredible! And not in a good way.

I’ll give you the opportunity to hear Anderson Cooper’s take on it too.

Until the next rant!

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And Abbey Martin

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Remember The First Law Of Holes – When You Are In One, Stop Digging!

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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The Sunday Sermon

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A Digging

Another week has gone by and President Obama just keeps on digging the hole he has unnecessarily got himself into.

Secretary of State Kerry has found a bigger shovel to help. And even the US Ambassador to the UN has jumped into the hole too.

Almost everyone else is against him, even the pope.

America has never been good at foreign policy decisions, but this latest debacle over Syria has to be one of the worst – EVER!

obama syria4

There have been a lot of mistakes. It looks like there will be a lot more. Here are some of the main ones.

Mistake #1  –  the worst of all – getting involved in something that is none of your business.

Mistake #2  –  refusing to take wise advice or recognize the mood of your own people and the rest of the world. End result, you leave yourself isolated with your influence to help anyone in the future much diminished.

Mistake #3  –  not learning from past mistakes of others. That just leads to repetition of previous debacles.  

Obama-Red-Line-on-Syria

Mistake #4  –  appointing other idiots to tour the world to make sure everyone knows how stupid you are.

Mistake #5  –  failure to commit totally. At least when Dubya and his conies were intent on getting us bogged down in Iraq they had the wit to tell Saddam to prepare for “Shock and Awe”. Obama’s right hand man Kerry, on the other hand, has threatened the Syrian leadership with a military response that will be – wait for it – “… an unbelievably small, limited kind of effort.” Rather than intimidating Assad that kind of threat must have left him doubled up with laughter!

Kerry unbelievably small military action

Mistake #6  –  making yourself look like a real dumbass by trying to be a smartass and calling an opponent a jackass. It may or may not be true, but resorting to such tactics just because someone doesn’t agree with you, almost always backfires on you. It has in this case. Putin is coming out looking reasonable and sensible while Obama is making himself look more and more ridiculous.

Obama Putin

There are plenty of other examples, but this lot will do for now.

It’s hard to correct mistakes at the best of times. But it is almost impossible to correct a mistake if you are so arrogant that you don’t realize you made one in the first place.

That’s what has happened to President Obama and that is why he just keeps on digging the hole he is in deeper and deeper and deeper.

obama syria6

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Silly Named Game, Four!!!!

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Part four of the silly place names.

The big question everyone – except possibly those who live there – asks is “Why?”.

I have no idea what the answer is.

But enjoy anyway.

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Silly Named Game Towns 028

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Silly Named Game Towns 027

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Silly Named Game Towns 026

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Silly Named Game Towns 024

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Silly Named Game Towns 023

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Silly Named Game Towns 022

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Silly Named Game Towns 020

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Silly Named Game Towns 017

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Silly Named Game Towns 015

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Silly Named Game Towns 019

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Silly Named Game Towns 018

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Silly Named Game Towns 016

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Try Braking, It Gives Your Driving A Bit Of 00mph.

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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It’s pun day.

The gift that just keeps on giving.

Try out this latest selection of word play gems.

Enjoy!

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When she lost her job in a toothpaste factory

for dropping the toothpaste tubes,

the girl was completely crestfallen.

Crest_toothpaste

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The first meteorologists who studied fog were mistified.

fog-06

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This couple went on a sea cruise to sea if they could save their marriage,

but they soon drifted apart!

cruise ship

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The guy always cheated at golf,

he didn’t play the fairway.

golf cheat cartoon

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I was telling a friend last night

that I made $1,000 by selling manure.

He said, “That’s gross.”

I said, “No, that’s net.”

manure happens

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What do you get if you eat a Blackberry?

A Bluetooth.

blackberry

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My sex life is unbelievable.

Whenever I tell people I have a sex life,

they don’t believe me.

sex life

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I can’t understand why my new automatic

air freshener doesn’t work even though

I’ve just put brand new batteries in it.

It just doesn’t make scents.

Automatic-Air-Freshener

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If you crossed a fortune teller with a prostitute

would you get your whoroscope!

whoroscope

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Tom said to his friend, “I think we should feed my wife herbicide.”

The friend said, “weed killer?”

“My point exactly,” Tom replied.

weedkiller

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I was throwing rice at an Indian wedding

and accidentally started a pilau fight.

pilau rice

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When I worked in a building supplies store,

one day this guy came in shouting and swearing

about needing something to fill a big hole in his wall.

Needless to say, I showed him the door.

new door

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17 days until I stop using aerosol deodorants.

Roll on!

roll on deodorant

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When I took my car in for a service

the guy at the shop said it would soon

need a new pair of shock absorbers.

He didn’t say when though

– the suspension’s killing me.

shock absorbers

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As a grown man I feel awkward admitting that I still play with my train set,

so I hide it under the duvet.

No one will find it now, I’ve covered my tracks.

train set

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I was having dinner with Mr T and he said,

“Don’t talk with your mouth full!”

I said, “How else would I talk? And I ain’t no fool.”

MrT

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I was surprised when my psychic friend complimented

me on the way I had cooked his steak.

“Well done” is rare from a medium.

psychic dinners

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I travel the land,

Asking rides from kind strangers:

I’m a hitchhaiku.

haiku

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An old lady at the park said to me today,

“I see your dog’s fetching balls.”

I said, “I know, but, at your age,

you shouldn’t really be looking.”

dog fetching ball

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After feeling a little depressed lately,

so I decided to treat myself to the new Jay-Z endorsed back-scratcher.

Now I’ve got 99 problems but an itch ain’t one.

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Okay, Enough Of The Presidential Nonsense – Time To Get Serious!

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Yes, if the election didn’t make you groan, here’s your chance.

Its bad joke pun day!

Enjoy them if you can.  

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It wasn’t school John disliked it was just the principal of it.

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A toothless termite walked into a tavern and said, “Is the bar tender here?”

termite .

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An electrician is a bright spark who knows what’s watt.

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Women who wear $200.00 perfume obviously are known to have no common scents.

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Did you hear about the fire at the circus? The heat was in tents.

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A baker stopped making donuts after he got tired of the hole thing.

donut cartoon .

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Communism first took off in the insect kingdom when a wary wasp joined the cagey bee.

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In the winter my dog wears his coat,

but in the summer he wears his coat and pants.

 Dog panting.

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Did you hear about the raisin that wined about how he couldn’t achieve grapeness.

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Opening a new funeral parlor can be quite an undertaking.

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I tend to avoid funerals, I’m not really a mourning person.

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The grammarian was never late. In fact he was always very punctual.

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I dropped out of my communism class because of lousy Marx.

 Obama-Marx cartoon.

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I finished my trigonometry exam without a secant to lose.

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To many girls the word ‘marriage’ has a nice ring to it.

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Those who stare at the moon are optimists.

They only look at the bright side.

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Tennis players don’t marry because Love means Nothing to them.

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Can Napoleon return to his place of birth?

Of Corsican.

 Napoleon cartoon.

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A Surprise Test – Are You Ready?

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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We haven’t had a test for a long time – until today, that is!!!

Below, for those brave enough to have a go, you will find twenty-one questions, some easy, some difficult, some tricky and some a bit of all three.

Enjoy and good luck!!!

(Answers are waaaaay below, but no cheating!)

 

 

1.  Is it possible for Jane to stand behind Lee and Lee to stand behind Jane at the same time?

 

2.  Leather shoes are worn in bowling and rubber-soled sneakers are worn in tennis. In what sport are all metal shoes worn?

 

3.  How many times can you subtract 2 from the number 21?

 calculator man

4.  On a farm outside of Winchester is the world’s most perfect peach tree. The main trunk has exactly 24 branches, each branch exactly 12 boughs, each bough exactly 6 twigs, and each twig bears 1 fruit. How many apples are on the tree?

 

5.  How close a relative would the sister-in-law of your father’s only brother be?

 

6.  On an average day, what mode of transportation carries more passengers than any other?

 

7.  Which book of the Bible tells you about Abel slaying Cain?

 Holy Bible

8.  How do you pronounce VOL IX?

 

9.  When someone says, “I’ll break every bone in your body,” how many bones would they have to break — 50, 200, 500, or 1,000?

cartoon skeleton 

10. There are 14 punctuation marks in ENGLISH grammar. How many can you name? (9 is passing grade)

 

11. What 5 letter word has 4 vowels and 1 consonant?   (Hint: The British use this word for line.) 

 

12. Can you make 10 plus 4 = 2 ?

 

13. The amount of water in a tank doubles every minute. The tank is full in an hour. When was the tank half full?

 

14. Would it be cheaper for you to take 1 friend to the movies twice or to take 2 friends at the same time?

 MovieTheater

15. A young boy comes from school. He lives in a high-rise building. Some days, he gets off the elevator at the eighth floor and walks up four flights to his family’s apartment on the 12th floor. On other days, he goes right up to the 12th floor. Why the difference?

 

16. A laborer can dig a hole 8 feet square and 8 feet deep in 8 days. How long will it take him to dig a hole 4 feet square and 4 feet deep?

 digging a hole

17. Rearrange the following letters to form one English word:   P N L L E E E E S S S S S

 

18. A clock loses 10 minutes each hour. If the clock is set correctly at noon, what time is it when it reads 3 PM?

 animated clock counting down hours over seconds

19. If 8 crows can steal 8 buttons in 8 minutes, how long will it take 16 crows to steal 16 buttons?

 

20. If 8 crows can steal 8 buttons in 8 minutes, how many buttons can 16 crows steal in 16 minutes?

 8 buttons

21. An electrician and a plumber were waiting in line for admission to the International Home Show. One of them was the father of the other’s son. How was this possible?

 

Answers waaaaaay below

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ANSWERS

1.  Is it possible for Jane to stand behind Lee and Lee to stand behind Jane at the same time?

     Yes, if they stand back-to-back.

 

2.  Leather shoes are worn in bowling and rubber-soled sneakers are worn in tennis. In what sport are all metal shoes worn?

     Horse Racing.

 

3.  How many times can you subtract 2 from the number 21?

     Once. After that, you are subtracting from 19, 17, …

 

4.  On a farm outside of Winchester is the world’s most perfect peach tree. The main trunk has exactly 24 branches, each branch exactly 12 boughs, each bough exactly 6 twigs, and each twig bears 1 fruit. How many apples are on the tree?

None. It’s a peach tree, so it doesn’t bear apples.

 

5.  How close a relative would the sister-in-law of your father’s only brother be?

     Your mother.

 

6.  On an average day, what mode of transportation carries more passengers than any other?

     Elevators.

 

7.  Which book of the Bible tells you about Abel slaying Cain?

     None. Abel didn’t slay Cain?

 

8.  How do you pronounce VOL IX?

     Volume Nine.

 

9.  When someone says, “I’ll break every bone in your body,” how many bones would they have to break — 50, 200, 500, or 1,000?

     200.

 

10. There are 14 punctuation marks in ENGLISH grammar. How many can you name? (9 is passing grade)

     Period, comma, quotes, question mark, semicolon, colon, apostrophe, ellipses (…), dash, exclamation point, asterisk, braces, hyphen, brackets, parentheses. Actually, that is 15.

 

11. What 5 letter word has 4 vowels and 1 consonant?  (Hint: The British use this word for line.)

     QUEUE.   Queueing has five vowels in a row!

 

12.  Can you make 10 plus 4 = 2 ?

     10 o’clock + 4 hours = 2 o’clock. 

13. The amount of water in a tank doubles every minute. The tank is full in an hour. When was the tank half full?

     59 minutes.

 

14. Would it be cheaper for you to take 1 friend to the movies twice or to take 2 friends at the same time?

      Take 2 friends at the same time — you only have to buy 3 tickets. Taking them separately requires the purchase of 4 tickets.

 

15. A young boy comes from school. He lives in a high-rise building. Some days, he gets off the elevator at the eighth floor and walks up four flights to his family’s apartment on the 12th floor. On other days, he goes right up to the 12th floor. Why the difference?

     He is too short to reach button 12. Sometimes no one else is on the elevator.

 

16. A laborer can dig a hole 8 feet square and 8 feet deep in 8 days. How long will it take him to dig a hole 4 feet square and 4 feet deep?

     1 day. It is 1/8 the size of the large hole.

 

17.  Rearrange the following letters to form one English word:    P N L L E E E E S S S S S

     SLEEPLESSNESS.

 

18. A clock loses 10 minutes each hour. If the clock is set correctly at noon, what time is it when it reads 3 PM?

     3:36 PM. 
The clock loses 10 minutes each hour, so it loses 5 minutes every half-hour, and it loses 1 minute every 6 minutes.
It is 12:50 PM at 1:00 o’clock. 
It is 1:40 PM at 2:00 o’clock. 
It is 2:30 PM at 3:00 o’clock. 
It is 2:55 PM at 3:30 o’clock. 
It is 3:00 PM at 3:36 o’clock. 

 

19. If 8 crows can steal 8 buttons in 8 minutes, how long will it take 16 crows to steal 16 buttons?

     8 minutes.

 

20. If 8 crows can steal 8 buttons in 8 minutes, how many buttons can 16 crows steal in 16 minutes?

     32 buttons.

 

21. An electrician and a plumber were waiting in line for admission to the International Home Show. One of them was the father of the other’s son. How was this possible?

     They were husband and wife.

 

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