Did You Know? Facts, Facts And More Facts.

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”


Fact day again on the fasab blog.

Another twenty things you probably don’t know now, but not to worry, you will do soon if you read on.



did you know1


Before Gmail, “G-Mail” was the name of a free

email service offered by Garfield’s website.




In America the bonnets and caps of city fire hydrants

are painted certain colors to alert firefighters

to the amount of water pressure available from that hydrant.

fire hydrant



It isn’t water itself that conducts electricity,

but the impurities found in it.

short_circuit water and electricity cartoon



Richard Hollingshead of Camden, N.J., built the first

drive-in theater in his driveway.

The idea was inspired by his mother who was a large woman

who found the seats at regular movie theaters uncomfortable.

He made it with a sheet strung between two trees and

a movie projector mounted to the hood of his car.




Washington state’s Mt. Rainier is the tallest

volcano in the contiguous United States,

measuring nearly 14,500 feet in height.

It last erupted in 1854.

mount rainier washington us



Despite their menacing appearance and fierce name,

dragonflies cannot sting and are harmless to human beings.




When referring to China, make sure

to say the People’s Republic of China.

Leave off “People’s” and you’re talking about Taiwan.




Approximately one quarter of the United States’

homeless population are war veterans.

(Shameful statistic!)




The inventors of bubble wrap,

Alfred Fielding and Marc Chavannes,

were originally trying to make plastic wallpaper.




The toilet featured in Hitchcock’s Psycho

was the first flushing toilet to appear on-screen.

psycho toilet



Frankincense, one of the precious items

the wise men gave the baby Jesus,

was actually an ancient form of chewing gum




The poinsettia is named after former

congressman and ambassador Joel Poinsett,

who introduced the plant to the United States in the 1800s.

Joel Poinsett



Peridots are the only gems that

have been found in meteorites.

Peridot August Birthstone



The longest jellyfish on record measured 160 feet,

more than half the length of a football field.




All holly trees are gender specific – male or female.

Only the female holly tree bears fruit (berries),

and in order to do so there must be a male

pollinated tree within a two mile radius of her.

holly tree in park



Two-thirds of the world’s lawyers live in the United States.




The Hard Rock Café got its name from a now-defunct bar that

appeared on the back of the Doors’ album Morrison Hotel.

Doors album cover Morrison Hotel - Hard Rock Cafe



When cranberries are ripe, they bounce like a rubber ball.




Due to the “naughty” dancing of the can-can girls and

the scantily clad models on 1800s French postcards,

the British equated anything risqué with France.

In fact, that’s how the phrase “pardon my French” entered the vernacular.

can can dancers



Scott Joplin’s famous piano song, “Maple Leaf Rag,”

was not named for the leaf or for Canada:

it was named for the Maple Leaf Club,

a social gathering place in Sedalia, Missouri.





Welcome To A Bumper Seasonal Edition Of Puns For The Holidays

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”


This week I have a bumper seasonal selection of word plays or puns that are all about or related to the Christmas Holiday Season. Some of them will sleigh you!

They aren’t any better or worse than normal, just themed.

And please don’t say they themed better last week!!!


Doing puns is my stocking trade at this time of year…


Why was Santa’s little helper depressed?

Because he had low elf esteem.

low elf esteem

What would you get if you ate the Christmas decorations?



What did the salt say to the pepper at Christmas?

Season’s Greetings.

santa salt pepper shakers

What do monkeys sing at Christmas time?

“Jungle bells, jungle bells, jungle all the way.”

jungle bells

Why did they ask the turkey to join the band?

Because he had the drum sticks.

turkey drumsticks

What did the bald man say when he got a comb for Christmas?

Thanks, I’ll never part with it!

bald man comb over

A man walks into a diner desiring breakfast.

The waitress seats him and he asks what the specials are.

She tells him the Christmas special is Eggs Benedict.

He orders the special.

A little later, the waitress comes out with the Eggs Benedict, served on hubcaps.

Surprised, he asks why the hubcaps instead of regular plates?

Her response?

“There’s no plates like chrome for the Hollandaise.”

Dave's diner

If athletes get athletes foot, what do astronauts get?

Missle toe!

Missle-Toe cartoon!

What is Santa’s primary language?

North Polish.

polish santa claus

Is Christmas the one day of the year we can all say our children are truly gifted!

Cartoon kids Christmas gifts

What do you get when you cross a Christmas tree with an iPad?

A pineapple.

cartoon pineapple

Why does Santa like to go down chimneys?

Because it soots him!

sooty Santa

Won’t all that soot make him sick? No. He’s had his flue shot.

cartoon doctor

What famous playwright was intimidated by Christmas?

Noel Coward

Noel Coward cartoon

How do sheep in Spain say Merry Christmas?

Fleece Navidad!

fleece navidad

“Wouldn’t just gold and frankincense do?” the third wise man demurred.


Why do you have to make sure the fire is out for Santa Claus coming down the chimney?

Coz if you didn’t you’d end up with a Crisp Cringle?

santa fire in chimney cartoon

What is a computer nerd’s favorite hymn?

Oh, .com all ye faithful!


Why wasn’t the turkey hungry at Christmas time?

Because he was stuffed.


Once there was a Tsar in Russia whose name was Rudolph the Great.

One day as he was standing in his house with his wife he looked out the window and saw something happening.

He says to his wife, “Look honey. It’s raining.” 

She, being the obstinate type, responded, ”I don’t think so, dear. I think it’s snowing.” 

But Rudolph knew better. So he says to his wife, ”Let’s step outside and we’ll find out.” 

Lo and behold, they step outside and discover it was in fact rain.

So Rudolph turns to his wife and says, ”I knew it was raining. Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear!”

Russian Tsar

If you don’t believe in Xmas parties do you still remain eggnogstic?


When the innkeeper’s assistant told Joseph there was no room at the Inn, he said “I’d like to see the manger.”

Joseph at the Inn

I was fed up by the time I got to my last present so I wrapped it up.

wrapping present

Are people who are afraid of Santa Claus-trophobic?


Oh, like I hadn’t heard that old chestnut before.

roasting chestnuts

“Why don’t we ever hear about ‘Olive,’ the 10th reindeer?” asked Bert.

“What 10th Reindeer?” asked Scott.

“You know. Olive, the other reindeer, used to laugh and call him names.”


Scrooge loves all the male reindeer, because every buck is dear to him.

mister scrooge magoo

What do you call Santa’s helpers?

Subordinate Clauses.


Just before Christmas, an honest politician, a generous lawyer and Santa Claus were riding in the elevator of a very posh hotel.

Just before the doors opened they all noticed a $20 bill lying on the floor.

Which one picked it up?

Santa of course, because the other two don’t exist!


Then there was the golfer who played on Christmas and hit a birdie. It was a partridge on a par 3.


The garden center got all spruced up to sell Christmas trees.

Christmas trees

This is not fir I can’t think of any more.


What is there left to say except have a Happy Holly Day.

Holly crown with red bow