Icebergs And Sunshine, Both Make The Fact File Today.

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Another contrasting day of facts here at the fasab blog.

And what could be more of a contrast than icebergs and sunshine?

Find out more below.

Enjoy.

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did you know2

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Contrary to popular belief,

the ‘t’ at the end of Voldemort,

who features in the Harry Potter stories,

is silent.

The name comes from the French

words meaning “flight of death.”

Lord Voldemort

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In North Carolina each year there is a

Hot Sauce and Hot Chili Pepper Eating Contest,

consisting of 5 rounds in which the participants

have to eat increasingly hot chilies.

The hotness of chilies is based on Scoville Heat Units.

In the first round, each contestant starts out with a

Large Cayenne Pepper (Long Hots) (500-2,500 SU)

and those who make it all the way to the last fifth round

have to deal with The Orange Habenero (100,000-300,000 SU).

Crikey!

Hot Sauce and Hot Chili Pepper Eating Contest

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Apparently Greece Is the “Sunniest” Country in Europe

enjoying on average more than 250 days of sunshine

(three thousand hours) a year,

which also makes it one of the

most sunny countries in the world.

Greece Is the “Sunniest” Country In Europe

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Daniel Craig is able to take any

Aston Martin from the factory

for the rest of his life,

because of his time as Bond.

Daniel Craig Aston Martin deal

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Tequila is made from the blue agave,

or agave tequilana Weber.

According to WebMD, the core of the plant

contains aguamiel or “honey water,”

which is used for syrup (and tequila) production.

blue agave

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All Egyptian pyramids were built

on the west bank of the River Nile,

which as the site of the setting sun

and was associated with the realm of

the dead in Egyptian mythology.

west bank of the River Nile

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The more education you have,

the lower your risk of heart disease,

however, in spite of that, heart disease

is still the greatest threat to your health.

heart disease

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The infamous iceberg that sank the Titanic

has been floating around since about 1,000 B.C.

Titanic iceberg

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Why do people sing in shower? 

One theory is that they might simply feel

more comfortable in the shower

since it is a relaxing place

and they are by themselves.

Or it may be because the acoustics

are better in the bathroom,

so the chances of you sounding

like a great singer are higher.

sing in shower

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Although it is supposed to be in Chicago,

the McCallister´s house in the movie Home Alone

is actually located at 671 Lincoln Avenue

in the village of Winnetka, Illinois.

The three-story single-family house

was listed for sale at $2.4 million in 2011

and sold for $1.585 million in 2012.

The house is now promoted as a tourist attraction.

McCallister´s house in the movie Home Alone

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As a farmer,

George Washington grew marijuana

on his farm and promoted its growth.

George Washington grew marijuana

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The October 24, 1960 saw one of the

deadliest spare-related accidents in history,

when a Soviet R-16 rocket (an ICBM) exploded

on the launch pad during testing.

72 workers were killed.

Soviet Premier at the time, Nikita Khrushchev,

demanded it be kept secret.

Today it is known as the Nedelin Catastrophe.

Nedelin Catastrophe

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A bottle of champagne contains

90 pounds or pressure per square inch,

which is three times the pressure found in car tires.

The popped cork from a champagne bottle

travels as fast as 60 miles per hour

and can cause some serious damage.

popped cork from a champagne bottle

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Mary Allerton was an immigrant

who established a permanent residence in

Plymouth Colony, which we know today as Massachusetts.

She was one of the many passengers of on the Mayflower,

the historic ship that transported the first Pilgrims,

from Plymouth, England, to the New World.

She was only four years old when she boarded the ship

and would die almost 80 years later,

making history as the last surviving Mayflower passenger.

Mary Allerton

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The first video uploaded to YouTube,

titled “Me at the zoo,”

made its debut on April 23, 2005.

The nineteen-second video was shot by Yakov Lapitsky

and shows YouTube cofounder Jawed Karim

at the San Diego Zoo.

It also contains the first words uttered on YouTube

which were

“All right, so here we are in front of the elephants”

when Karim was trying to “charm” the camera.

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“I Think” Said The Sweet Potato, “Therefore I Yam”

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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The clue is in the title.

We’re playing with words again.

Yes, it’s pun day.

Enjoy!

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rofl

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I had no idea there were so many different types of sandpaper.

Luckily the guy in the shop gave me a rough guide.

sandpaper

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My grandfather tried to start his own company building airplanes.

But he couldn’t get it off the ground.

airplane

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I’ve just started time travelling with an old friend of mine.

We go back a long way.

time-travel-institute

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I used to have a job drilling for oil.

It was boring.

oil rig

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I had to start singing when I realized I didn’t have

enough money to get into the public toilets.

I was busking for a piss.

busker

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Every summer, my dad would take me to the beach,

put me in a chest and bury me in the sand.

Treasured memories.

boy with treasure map

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I’m having difficulty creating saline water.

I can’t work out if salt is part of the problem or part of the solution.

eureka-lab-cartoon

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I only got it two weeks and already my

Chinese sound system is broken.

So stereotypical.

sound system

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You know you’re in red neck territory when the

girls think Timberland is a theme park for lumberjacks.

wacky-races-06

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You know what seems odd to me?

Numbers that aren’t divisible by two.

Numbers-5-17-11-color

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I heard that Rapunzel used to be a real party animal.

She was always letting her hair down.

rapunzel__rapunzel__let_down_your_hair__by_miamidoll-d59m7pi

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After a hard day at work I thought it would be funny

to give my boss a big pat on the back.

That was my last day working on his farm.

cartoon-cow-pat-fly-buffet

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As I sat down to dinner with Gaius Marius, Julius Caesar

and my wife, she rolled her eyes and said

“No, I said I wanted more ROMANCE in our relationship”.

Romans at dinner

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I drink so much my liver is more like a dier.

Most Funny Drunk Animals (5)

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Monk: “What porn is acceptable?”

Archbishop: “Nun.”

catholiccartoonblog-pope-abuse-scandal-press-kick-me

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The banker said he could offer me a credit card with no interest.

I said, “Then why are you doing it?”

credit card cartoon2

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I got sacked from NASA for falling asleep on the rocket.

It completely ruined the salad at their summer barbecue.

rocket-salad-denna-jones-flickr

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Once on vacation my friend fell over a pyramid and hurt his mouth.

Egypt his tooth.

pyramids-of-egypt-cartoonpyramids-by-alexei-talimonov-media-culture-cartoon-toonpool-vrthbium

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The duck said to the bartender,

‘put it on my bill.’

looney-tunes-520-2

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I was in a Chinese restaurant last night and I asked

the waiter if there were any Chinese Jews.

He walked off then came back a while later and said,

“No we only have apple juice, lemon juice or orange juice.”

chinese restaurant

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A Surprise Test – Are You Ready?

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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We haven’t had a test for a long time – until today, that is!!!

Below, for those brave enough to have a go, you will find twenty-one questions, some easy, some difficult, some tricky and some a bit of all three.

Enjoy and good luck!!!

(Answers are waaaaay below, but no cheating!)

 

 

1.  Is it possible for Jane to stand behind Lee and Lee to stand behind Jane at the same time?

 

2.  Leather shoes are worn in bowling and rubber-soled sneakers are worn in tennis. In what sport are all metal shoes worn?

 

3.  How many times can you subtract 2 from the number 21?

 calculator man

4.  On a farm outside of Winchester is the world’s most perfect peach tree. The main trunk has exactly 24 branches, each branch exactly 12 boughs, each bough exactly 6 twigs, and each twig bears 1 fruit. How many apples are on the tree?

 

5.  How close a relative would the sister-in-law of your father’s only brother be?

 

6.  On an average day, what mode of transportation carries more passengers than any other?

 

7.  Which book of the Bible tells you about Abel slaying Cain?

 Holy Bible

8.  How do you pronounce VOL IX?

 

9.  When someone says, “I’ll break every bone in your body,” how many bones would they have to break — 50, 200, 500, or 1,000?

cartoon skeleton 

10. There are 14 punctuation marks in ENGLISH grammar. How many can you name? (9 is passing grade)

 

11. What 5 letter word has 4 vowels and 1 consonant?   (Hint: The British use this word for line.) 

 

12. Can you make 10 plus 4 = 2 ?

 

13. The amount of water in a tank doubles every minute. The tank is full in an hour. When was the tank half full?

 

14. Would it be cheaper for you to take 1 friend to the movies twice or to take 2 friends at the same time?

 MovieTheater

15. A young boy comes from school. He lives in a high-rise building. Some days, he gets off the elevator at the eighth floor and walks up four flights to his family’s apartment on the 12th floor. On other days, he goes right up to the 12th floor. Why the difference?

 

16. A laborer can dig a hole 8 feet square and 8 feet deep in 8 days. How long will it take him to dig a hole 4 feet square and 4 feet deep?

 digging a hole

17. Rearrange the following letters to form one English word:   P N L L E E E E S S S S S

 

18. A clock loses 10 minutes each hour. If the clock is set correctly at noon, what time is it when it reads 3 PM?

 animated clock counting down hours over seconds

19. If 8 crows can steal 8 buttons in 8 minutes, how long will it take 16 crows to steal 16 buttons?

 

20. If 8 crows can steal 8 buttons in 8 minutes, how many buttons can 16 crows steal in 16 minutes?

 8 buttons

21. An electrician and a plumber were waiting in line for admission to the International Home Show. One of them was the father of the other’s son. How was this possible?

 

Answers waaaaaay below

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ANSWERS

1.  Is it possible for Jane to stand behind Lee and Lee to stand behind Jane at the same time?

     Yes, if they stand back-to-back.

 

2.  Leather shoes are worn in bowling and rubber-soled sneakers are worn in tennis. In what sport are all metal shoes worn?

     Horse Racing.

 

3.  How many times can you subtract 2 from the number 21?

     Once. After that, you are subtracting from 19, 17, …

 

4.  On a farm outside of Winchester is the world’s most perfect peach tree. The main trunk has exactly 24 branches, each branch exactly 12 boughs, each bough exactly 6 twigs, and each twig bears 1 fruit. How many apples are on the tree?

None. It’s a peach tree, so it doesn’t bear apples.

 

5.  How close a relative would the sister-in-law of your father’s only brother be?

     Your mother.

 

6.  On an average day, what mode of transportation carries more passengers than any other?

     Elevators.

 

7.  Which book of the Bible tells you about Abel slaying Cain?

     None. Abel didn’t slay Cain?

 

8.  How do you pronounce VOL IX?

     Volume Nine.

 

9.  When someone says, “I’ll break every bone in your body,” how many bones would they have to break — 50, 200, 500, or 1,000?

     200.

 

10. There are 14 punctuation marks in ENGLISH grammar. How many can you name? (9 is passing grade)

     Period, comma, quotes, question mark, semicolon, colon, apostrophe, ellipses (…), dash, exclamation point, asterisk, braces, hyphen, brackets, parentheses. Actually, that is 15.

 

11. What 5 letter word has 4 vowels and 1 consonant?  (Hint: The British use this word for line.)

     QUEUE.   Queueing has five vowels in a row!

 

12.  Can you make 10 plus 4 = 2 ?

     10 o’clock + 4 hours = 2 o’clock. 

13. The amount of water in a tank doubles every minute. The tank is full in an hour. When was the tank half full?

     59 minutes.

 

14. Would it be cheaper for you to take 1 friend to the movies twice or to take 2 friends at the same time?

      Take 2 friends at the same time — you only have to buy 3 tickets. Taking them separately requires the purchase of 4 tickets.

 

15. A young boy comes from school. He lives in a high-rise building. Some days, he gets off the elevator at the eighth floor and walks up four flights to his family’s apartment on the 12th floor. On other days, he goes right up to the 12th floor. Why the difference?

     He is too short to reach button 12. Sometimes no one else is on the elevator.

 

16. A laborer can dig a hole 8 feet square and 8 feet deep in 8 days. How long will it take him to dig a hole 4 feet square and 4 feet deep?

     1 day. It is 1/8 the size of the large hole.

 

17.  Rearrange the following letters to form one English word:    P N L L E E E E S S S S S

     SLEEPLESSNESS.

 

18. A clock loses 10 minutes each hour. If the clock is set correctly at noon, what time is it when it reads 3 PM?

     3:36 PM. 
The clock loses 10 minutes each hour, so it loses 5 minutes every half-hour, and it loses 1 minute every 6 minutes.
It is 12:50 PM at 1:00 o’clock. 
It is 1:40 PM at 2:00 o’clock. 
It is 2:30 PM at 3:00 o’clock. 
It is 2:55 PM at 3:30 o’clock. 
It is 3:00 PM at 3:36 o’clock. 

 

19. If 8 crows can steal 8 buttons in 8 minutes, how long will it take 16 crows to steal 16 buttons?

     8 minutes.

 

20. If 8 crows can steal 8 buttons in 8 minutes, how many buttons can 16 crows steal in 16 minutes?

     32 buttons.

 

21. An electrician and a plumber were waiting in line for admission to the International Home Show. One of them was the father of the other’s son. How was this possible?

     They were husband and wife.

 

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When Your Bank Gives You A Load Of Sh1t, Just Give It Right Back To Them!

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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It isn’t often that there is the opportunity to report a victory of the common man over the banksters. But a few years ago one did happen when a 71-year-old British farmer, from Northumberland, won a £300,000 settlement from his bank after what he described as years of frustration and pain.

Although the bank settled, shortly before the case went to the British High Court, the farmer, Mr David Cannon, said he still felt as though he had not got justice. “They could give me every penny on the planet, but it still couldn’t put it right. It’s taken 10 years away from me. To them it’s monopoly money, but to me it’s all I’ll get.”

His problem was with the National Westminster Bank plc, and began in May 1990. It centered on £70,000 which Mr Cannon claimed went missing somewhere between his own account, his son’s personal and business accounts and an account belonging to his son’s business partner.

He is convinced the money had disappeared gradually during “dozens and dozens” of transfers between the accounts. Naturally the NatWest Bank always strongly denied that the money went astray.

The legal proceedings started way back in 1991, and the Cannons were forced to sell their 300-strong herd of prize-winning Ayrshire cows to fund their case. Mr Cannon said: “It was heart-breaking having to sell the herd, and soon I, and especially my wife, had problems with our health.”

After four-and-a-half years of deadlock with the legal proceedings Mr Cannon decided enough was enough. He borrowed a muck-spreader and chugged into Newcastle-upon-Tyne on his tractor.

In a little over two minutes, he blasted four tons of slurry over NatWest’s Mosley Street branch.

Phew!!!

Stonemasons spent two weeks clearing up and Mr Cannon was fined £2,000. But undeterred, a year later, he subjected the bank’s Ponteland branch to the same exterior decoration.

He really was giving them shit!

Still the dispute dragged on, until December 1998, by which time Mr Cannon had lost patience once again. This time he blocked the door of the Grey Street branch of the bank with his tractor.

Ten months later he returned to the Ponteland branch, baffling staff by measuring the entrance. The next day he forced the doors open with his tractor and barricaded himself inside, nailing fence rails across the doorway. This bank job cost him another £600.

His final fling occurred the following June 12, when he dumped a five-ton load of shit on the doorstep of the Ponteland branch and returned to his farm – pursued by police. Amazingly, he managed to reload and chugged back to the bank, where he made a second five-ton deposit. A low-speed chase ensued, the police puncturing the 10mph tractor’s tyres with a ‘stinger’.

Mr Cannon was charged with criminal damage, dangerous driving, driving without an excise licence and failing to stop for a police officer. He was given a 60-day suspended sentence and ordered to pay £845.60 compensation plus £250 costs.

Mr Cannon, a former bare-knuckle boxer, said: “But fortunately it was in my nature to fight them. Breeding cattle was my life.”

The bank, NatWest issued a token 63-word statement which denied any admission of liability. They refused to add to it when questioned by reporters.

Simon Pitkeathley of the British Bankers’ Association, says angry customers would do better to follow the conventional complaints procedure or move your account elsewhere, said: “Mr Cannon’s behaviour obviously can’t be condoned.”

But I liked it. Good one Mr C.

The big question is, by awarding £300,000 to a man who has taken direct action, has the bank set a dangerous precedent for those distressed customers contemplating direct action? Wouldn’t it be great if they were in for loads more shi……I mean, bother?

 

Farmer David Cannon giving his bank some shit
Farmer David Cannon giving his bank some shit