Sweaty Palms And Underarms – I Smell Fact Day!

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Yes, today’s selection of facts includes sweaty palms and underarms.

You may be surprised by these and some of the other offerings below.

Enjoy.

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did you know5

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A person can only remember

four things at a time.

remember four things at a time

.

.

And speaking of four,

of the four smokestacks on the Titanic,

only three were real working chimneys,

the fourth was totally for decoration only.

four smokestacks on the Titanic

.

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Palm sweat can be triggered by two separate things,

your body trying to control its temperature

or trying to cope with emotional stress,

both of which are closely linked.

Palm sweat

.

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In July of 1518 a woman began to

dance in the street in Stasbourg.

She was eventually joined by about 400 dancers.

It’s not clear exactly how many people died

due to this ‘dancing plague’, but some

definitely died from heart attack,

stroke or exhaustion.

Dancing-Plague-1518

.

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The Great Pyramid of Giza is the oldest of

the Seven Wonders of the Ancient World

and the last one still in existence.

Great Pyramid of Giza

.

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In his entire career (so far) James Bond

has been shot at 4,662 times.

james_bond

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The blue whale has the largest heart

weighing over 1,500 pounds.

blue whale has the largest heart

.

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Although polar bears are usually born on land,

they spend most of their time at sea.

Their scientific name Ursus Maritimus

means ‘maritime bear’.

polar-bear-ursus-maritimus-underwater--19238

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When a person gets right to the precise point

or says something that is verified as correct it is

often said that they have ‘hit the nail on the head’.

The exact origin of the phrase is not known,

but it appeared for the first time in print in

1438 in The Book of Margery Kempe.

hit the nail on the head

.

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7,000 deaths occur each year because

of doctors’ sloppy handwriting.

doctors' sloppy handwriting

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According to the Australian census,

Melbourne has the largest Greek population

outside Greece with over 150,000 people

being of Greek origin, which technically

makes Melbourne the sixth biggest city

in terms of Greek population.

Melbourne largest Greek population

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The sweat from a man’s underarm

can help women relax,

boost their mood and

help regulate their menstrual cycle,

if applied to her lips.

There you are ladies, now you know.

sweat from a man's underarm

.

.

Mongol fleets tried to conquer Japan

twice in 7 years, but both times

they were stopped by a typhoon.

These events were described as

Kamikaze or ‘Divine Wind’.

Kamikaze or ‘Divine Wind’

.

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Thomas Jefferson and John Adams

both died on July 4th

on the 50th Anniversary of

the Declaration of Independence.

Thomas Jefferson and John Adams

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Psy’s “Gangnam Style” is

the most watched YouTube video ever

with nearly 2.2 billion views and counting.

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= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =

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“I Think,” Said The Sweet Potato, “Therefore I Yam.”

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”
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Well today I yam the poster of more puns.
Keep your groans handy, you might need ‘em.
Enjoy or endure.
rofl.

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You can say what you like

about freedom of speech.

freedom_of_speech_in_europe

.
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I would love to dance at a metric party,

but I have two left 0.305 meters.

Meter-to-Foot-conversion
.
.
Waiters are good at multiplication

because they know their tables.

waiter
.
.
I accidentally grabbed a

live electric cable yesterday.

It really Hertz.

live electric cable
.
.
Capital punishment.

capital PUNISHMENT
.
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I used to work at a car garage

that had a jet wash.

It was pointless,

there was nowhere for them to land.

airplane washing
.
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I got a 24 hour clock from

a garage sale for only 10/c.

They’ll be so mad,

it’s lasted far longer.

24 hour clock
.
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I’m in court accused of the murders of

Dracula and Monte Cristo.

I’m pleading guilty to both Counts.

Dracula and Monte Cristo
.
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There’s a Muslim in the street carrying a gun.

Police say he’s Ahmed and dangerous.

Ahmed and dangerous
.
.
My ex girlfriend text to say that

she’d made a voodoo doll of me.

I think she’s pulling my leg.

Voodoo-doll
.
.
I used to have a job in the police force,

in which I’d break into secure

computer files to uncover criminal activity.

That was until I was met by one system

that proved I wasn’t up to the job.

I just couldn’t hack it.

hacker

.
.
Driving home, I noticed I had a

police car right up my ass.

Must have a word with my nephew

about leaving his toys lying around.

toy-police-car
.
.
I’d been worrying about my

geography exam for a long time.

When I sat down to take it,

the first question read;

“What is the correct term for any wind that

blows between 4 and 30 miles per hour?”

I don’t know what I was worried about.

It was a breeze.

breeze
.
.
I was so nervous when I met my

future father-in-law that i blurted out,

“Sir, May I have your daughters

hole in handy matrimony?”

met my future father-in-law
.
.
What do you call a bunch of

kleptomaniacs with musical instruments?

A Steal Band.
.


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Happy Thanksgiving 2014.

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Today is the fourth Thursday of November and also the last Thursday in November so whether you think Lincoln was right or Roosevelt was right, it still Thanksgiving Day in the USA.

To everyone who participates, enjoy the family holiday, eat too much and drink too much.

Last year I did what turned out to be a very popular post called “I Had To Post A Few Turkey Puns Today, Of Course They Are Fowl” ( Click here if you would like to read it.) And this year I’ve done it again.

So here are some more really bad jokes.

Enjoy or endure.

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rofl

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Thanksgiving,

the time of year when turkeys

fatten Americans up for Christmas!

funny-happy-thanksgiving-turkey-poster

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Why didn’t the Pilgrim want to make the stuffing?

Because it’s such a crummy job!

turkey-thanksgiving-jokes

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What happened when the turkey got into a fight?

He got the stuffing knocked out of him.

funny-turkey

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What kind of music did the Pilgrims like?

Plymouth Rock, of course!

Plymouth Rock

.

.

What would you get if you crossed

a turkey with a baked fruit dessert?

A peach gobbler!

funny turkey photo

.

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What’s the best dance to do on Thanksgiving?

The turkey trot

turkey trot

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What does a Turkey drink wine in?

In a gobble-let

Turkey drink wine

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What did baby corn say to mama corn?

Where’s popcorn?

turkey eating popcorn cartoon

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Why did the turkey sit on the tomahawk?

To try to hatchet!

tomahawk

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Teacher: “What did the Indians bring

to the first Thanksgiving?”

Student: “Baseballs.”

Teacher: “Baseballs?”

Student: “Yeah,

they were Cleveland Indians!”

Logo_Cleveland Indians

.

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Who is the turkey’s favorite movie star?

Gregory Peck.

thanksgiving_bush

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If you divide the circumference

of a pumpkin by its diameter

Do you end up with

Pumpkin pi?

pumpkin pie pi

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Can a turkey jump higher than

the Empire State Building?

Yes of course it can

– a building can’t jump at all.

unfriends-me-on-facebook

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Why did the pilgrim’s pants keep falling down?

Because his buckle was on his hat!

pilgrim

.

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And finally,

instead of talking turkey,

let’s hear someone sing turkey instead.

Take it away Dickie Stickhead

(Phew, you have to be careful how you say that name!)

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There’s A Fine Line Between Hyphenated Words…

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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There is indeed a fine line between hyphenated words – haven’t you noticed?

Yes, it’s the day to play on words, or play with words.

Whatever way you want to put it, it’s pun day!

Enjoy or endure!

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rofl

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The other day I held the door open for a clown.

I thought it was a nice jester.

clown jester

.

.

I thought my Granny was going to get me a jumper for my birthday

but she just gave me a card again.

cardigan

.

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I play for my shop fitting company’s football team.

We are great on the counter attack.

a_Dodson_Shop_Fitters_Reception_Counter_with_Glass_Shelves

.

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I’ve sent a few angry letters to my Congressman.

A ‘G’ and three ‘R’s.

grrr

.

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I had a good morning today, I met Cameron Diaz.

And her brother, Buenos.

Cameron-Diaz

.

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I’m lying in bed listening to the Carpenters…

Who are taking way too long installing the new kitchen.

carpenter-kitchen-fitter

.

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I’ve just started a new extermination company

that specialises in felines.

I’m calling it curiosity.

Curiosity+killed+the+cat.+source+smosh+facebook+page_06d5f5_3980829

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L’Oreal Saudi Arabia.

Burkas you’re worth it.

l'oreal Saudi Arabia, burkas you're worth it

.

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My other half reckons I might have schizophrenia!

schizophrenia

.

.

I took a poll recently,

and 100% of the strippers asked

were angry they had nothing to dance on.

silhouette-pole

.

.

“OK son, what do you understand

by the word ‘omniscient’?”

He said, “God knows…”

What a clever little boy!

clever little boy

.

.

I’m writing a post about storms.

So far, it’s just a rough draft.

storms

.

.

Did you hear about the mexcian train killer?

He had locomotives.

Mexican train game

.

.

What’s the singular of ‘werewolves’?

‘I’m a wolf’.

Cartoon Werewolf

.

.

I was gob smacked when my Swedish friend came to

visit from the states and was now living as a woman.

He was Bjorn in the U.S.A.

Bjorn in the U.S.A.

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Another Day For All You Quizzers Out There.

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Another set of twenty questions to get you thinking.

They say they are all easy if you know the answers – and can remember them!

Good luck with this lot, some are easy but some are quite tough.

And if you get stuck you’ll find the answers waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay down below – but NO cheating please!

Enjoy.

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quiz confused1

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Q.  1:  Which vitamin is also known as ascorbic acid?

.

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Q.  2:  Approximately what percentage of all the water on Earth is fresh water?

           a)  3%        b)  13%        c) 23%        d) 33%

.

. 

Q.  3:  In Greek mythology which Trojan hero killed Achilles?

.

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Q.  4:  In which Hitchcock movie is Cary Grant’s character the victim of mistaken identity?

.

.

Q.  5:  What type of animal is a skink?

           a) Snake        b) Lizard        c) Marsupial

 .

.

Q.  6:  In German cuisine what is Stollen?

.

.

Q.  7:  Which of these wars took place first?

           a) Boer War         b) First World War        c) Crimean War

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Q.  8:  Which American company produces the Polo clothing line?

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Q.  9:  On what English play is the musical West Side Story based?

.

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Q. 10:  What color is known as sable in heraldry?

.

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Q. 11:  Which Apostle is often described as the first Pope?

.

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Q. 12:  Professor Robert Langdon features in novels by which American author?

.

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Q. 13:  What shape is ‘rigatoni’ pasta?

            a) shell        b) tube        c) cartwheel        d) spiral

.

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Q. 14:  ‘Nature morte’ is the French term for what type of painting?

            a) portrait        b) landscape        c) still life

.

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Q. 15:  The term ‘zoophagous’ has a similar meaning to which of the following words?

            a) carnivorous        b) herbivorous        c) piscivorous

.

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Q. 16:  What does the musical term ‘adagio’ mean?

.

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Q. 17:  Harold Holt who disappeared while swimming in 1967 was the Prime Minister of which country?

            a) Canada        b) United Kingdom        c) Australia         d) New Zealand

.

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Q. 18:  In what country did the tango dance originate?

.

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Q. 19:  Which US President did John Hinckley try to assassinate?

.

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Q. 20:  In what year did Elvis Presley die?

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ANSWERS

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Q.  1:  Which vitamin is also known as ascorbic acid?

A.  1:  Vitamin C.

.

.

Q.  2:  Approximately what percentage of all the water on Earth is fresh water?

           a)  3%        b)  13%        c) 23%        d) 33%

A.  2:  a)  3%

.

.

Q.  3:  In Greek mythology which Trojan hero killed Achilles?

A.  3:  Paris, who shot him in the heel with a poison arrow.

.

.

Q.  4:  In which Hitchcock movie is Cary Grant’s character the victim of mistaken identity?

A.  4:  North By Northwest.

.

.

Q.  5:  What type of animal is a skink?

           a) Snake        b) Lizard        c) Marsupial

A.  5:  b) Lizard

.

.

Q.  6:  In German cuisine what is Stollen?

A.  6:  A Fruit Loaf.

.

.

Q.  7:  Which of these wars took place first?

           a) Boer War         b) First World War        c) Crimean War

A.  7:  c) Crimean War

.

.

Q.  8:  Which American company produces the Polo clothing line?

A.  8:  Ralph Lauren.

.

.

Q.  9:  On what English play is the musical West Side Story based?

A.  9:  Romeo And Juliet by William Shakespeare.

.

.

Q. 10:  What color is known as sable in heraldry?

A. 10:  Black.

.

.

Q. 11:  Which Apostle is often described as the first Pope?

A. 11:  Peter.

.

.

Q. 12:  Professor Robert Langdon features in novels by which American author?

A. 12:  Dan Brown.

.

.

Q. 13:  What shape is ‘rigatoni’ pasta?

            a) shell        b) tube        c) cartwheel        d) spiral

A. 13:  b) tube.

.

.

Q. 14:  ‘Nature morte’ is the French term for what type of painting?

            a) portrait        b) landscape        c) still life

A. 14:  c) still life.

.

.

Q. 15:  The term ‘zoophagous’ has a similar meaning to which of the following words?

            a) carnivorous        b) herbivorous        c) piscivorous

A. 15:  a) carnivorous.

.

.

Q. 16:  What does the musical term ‘adagio’ mean?

A. 16:  Slow.

.

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Q. 17:  Harold Holt who disappeared while swimming in 1967 was the Prime Minister of which country?

            a) Canada        b) United Kingdom        c) Australia         d) New Zealand

A. 17:  c) Australia

.

.

Q. 18:  In what country did the tango dance originate?

A. 18:  Argentina.

.

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Q. 19:  Which US President did John Hinckley try to assassinate?

A. 19:  Ronald Reagan.

.

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Q. 20:  In what year did Elvis Presley die?

A. 20:  1977.

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==============================

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It’s July 4th, You Know What Day That Is?

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Yes, you got it, it’s Pun Day.

And because Pun Day this year happens to fall on July 4th, here’s a special Independence word play edition.

Enjoy this festive edition!

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What happened as a result of the Stamp Act?

The Americans licked the British!

stamp-act-cartoon

.

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Why did the British cross the Atlantic?

To get to the other tide!

Valcour bay

.

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What would you get if you crossed a patriot with a small curly-haired dog?

A Yankee Poodle Dandy!

Yankee Poodle Dandy

.

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Did you hear the one about the Liberty Bell?

Yeah, it cracked me up!

Liberty_Bell_2008
The Liberty Bell

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What would Americans get if they crossed George Washington with cattle feed?

The fodder of their Country!

fodder-cow

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Where did George Washington buy his hatchet?

At the chopping mall!

chopping_mall

.

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What was General Washington’s favorite tree?

The infantry!

Washington  Infrantry color seal d

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What kind of tea did the American colonists thirst for?

Liber-Tea!

LIBERTEA-2a

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Which colonists told the most jokes?

Punsylvanians!

Pennsylvania-SC

.

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What did a patriot put on his dry skin?

Revo-lotion!

revolutionary war scene

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What dance was very popular in 1776?

Indepen-dance!

Patriotic Dance

.

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Which one of Washington’s officers had the best sense of humor?

Laughayette!

lafayette
Marquis de La Fayette served as a major-general in the Continental Army under George Washington and was a leader of the Garde nationale during the French Revolution.

.

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What was Thomas Jefferson’s favourite dessert?

Monti jello!

Thomas_Jefferson's_Monticello_Estate
Thomas Jefferson’s Monticello Estate

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What did King George think of the American colonists?

He thought they were revolting!

King George

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Why were the early American settlers like ants?

Because they lived in colonies.

Colonial America
Colonial America

.

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What has feathers, webbed feet, and certain inalienable rights?

The Ducklaration of Independence!

It's no longer about governing. It's about controlling.

.

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What would you get if you crossed the American national bird with Snoopy?

A bald beagle!

BaldBeagle

.

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What was the craziest battle of the Revolutionary War?

The Battle of Bonkers Hill.

Battle of Bunker Hill

.

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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom!

Declaration of Independence signatures

.

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Did you hear about the cartoonist in the Continental Army?

He was a Yankee doodler!

Yankee Doodle

.

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What protest by a group of dogs occurred in 1773?

The Boston Flea Party!

flea party

.

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What would you get if you crossed Washington’s home with nasty insects?

Mt. Vermin!

Mount Vernon
Washington’s Mount Vernon Estate

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Which son of old Virginia wrote the Declaration of Independence?

I think it was Thomas Jeffer’s son.

Thomas Jefferson
Thomas Jefferson’s words and hopes. How far have the present leaders of America strayed from those lofty and laudable goals?

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Did You Know…. Another Random Selection Of Facts From The Fasab Files

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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More from the fascinating fact file.

Here are a few more things that you didn’t know you didn’t know.

Enjoy.

.

did you know 5

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There are 293 ways to make change for a dollar.

change for a dollar

.

. 

A healthy (non-colorblind) human eye

can distinguish between 500 shades of gray.

So the book is wrong!

500 shades of gray.

. 

A pregnant goldfish is called a twit 

–  especially by her parents!

goldfish.

. 

If you plant an apple seed,

it is almost guaranteed to grow a tree

of a different type of apple.

apple tree.

. 

Andorra, a tiny country between France & Spain,

has the longest average lifespan:

83.49 years.

Andorra.

. 

“The sixth sick sheik’s sixth sheep’s sick”

is said to be the toughest tongue twister in English.

tongue twister.

. 

‘Duff’ is the decaying organic matter found on a forest floor.

forest.

. 

Gabriel, Michael, and Lucifer are the only angels named in the Bible.

archangels.

. 

Abraham Lincoln’s ghost is said to haunt the White House.

lincoln ghost.

. 

Only female mosquitoes bite.

mosquito female.

. 

The past-tense of the English word “dare” is “durst”

past tense.

. 

Months that begin on a Sunday will always have a “Friday the 13th.”

friday the 13th.

. 

Ninety percent of New York City cabbies are recently arrived immigrants.

(and ninety percent of that ninety percent have no clue where they are going!)

NY cabbies rogues.

. 

The volume of the earth’s moon is the same

as the volume of the Pacific Ocean.

moon.

. 

The New York phone book had 22 Hitlers before WWII.

The New York phone book had 0 Hitlers after WWII.

phone book.

. 

King Louis XIX ruled France for about 15 minutes 

–  he succeeded with abdication of Charles X

only to abdicate in favor of Henry V.

Louis_antoine_artois.

. 

Armored knights raised their visors to identify themselves

when they rode past their king.

This custom has become the modern military salute.

armored knight.

. 

Winston Churchill was born in a ladies room during a dance.

(and all new babies look just like him, except your own of course!)

 Churchill babies

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================================

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Can Reincarnation Ever Make A Comeback?

 “Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

.

Hi, sorry to disappoint if you thought this post was going to be a discussion on reincarnation. Well I suppose it might once have been, but today it has come back as another selection of puns and word plays. Enjoy!

.

.

I went for a depression test.

It came back negative.

depression test.

.

Its pathetic to be high,

highpathetically speaking.

.

It’s constipation that puts the toil into toilets.

Constipation.

.

 

I asked my girlfriend to marry me at a football match.

She said, “No, I’d prefer a church.”

.

  .

 

All the good puns about the periodic table argon.

.

  .

 

Do you believe all that Ancient Greek stuff about Paris and Helen

and the face that launched a thousand ships?

Yes, of course I do, it’s a Troy story.

 Helen of Troy .

  .

Paddy goes into Macy’s department store and asks the assistant,

“Excuse me sir, but do you sell potato clocks?”

The assistant looks at him and says,

“Are you trying to be funny?

We sell cuckoo clocks, carriage clocks, grandfather clocks, alarm clocks

… what the heck is a potato clock?”

And Paddy says,

“I don’t know, but I start my new job at nine tomorrow,

and the wife said ‘You’d better get a potato clock.'”

.

  .

 

I’ve got an inferiority complex,

but it’s not a very good one.

.

.

  

I bought a new dog yesterday.

I’ve named him Rolex

…….he’s a watchdog

watchdog.

.

 

You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today.

They left a little note on the windscreen.

It said, ‘Parking Fine.’

So that was nice.

.

  .

 

What do Mexicans put under their carpets?

Underlay, underlay!

.

 

Why do mice have small balls?

Not that many of them know how to dance!

 Dancing mice .

  .

My mate Sid was a victim of ID theft.

He’s just called S now.

.

  .

 

I bought a book when I was in China last year, called “How To Woo”.

I thought it might help me with my seduction techniques.

Turns out it was volume 2 of the Chinese phone book.

.

  . 

 

I’ve had amnesia as long as I can remember.

.

  .

 

I can drive a woman wild with my tongue.

It’s pretty easy.

All you do is say,

“Have you put on weight?”

 dmalbit .

  .

And finally,

in the interests of clarification because of all the speculation currently on the media,

the real reason for the timing of the Pope’s resignation can now be revealed,

along with probably one of the worst jokes in the history of the papacy,

the Pope will resign at the end of February and not wait until after Easter,

because he doesn’t like eggs, Benedict!

 

=========================

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Congratulations! You’ve Won Nothing At All. How Could You With Answers Like These?

 “Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

 .

It is a continual mystery to me why people who are so obviously dumb enter pressure competitions on television thinking they will win something. But they do try. And the only prize they get is to end up on blogs like this.

Get out the whipped cream and enjoy!

 .

.

Q: Name a car known by its initials        

A: Corvette       

 

 

Q: Name something you keep in a kitchen canister         

A: Cans           

 

 

Q: Name a reason a man might take his toupee off        

A: To show off  

 

 

Q: Name a state with good skiing          

A: Florida         

 

 

Q: Name a word that rhymes with “cookie”         

A: Nookie         

 

 

Q: If someone tells you a secret, how many people do you tell? 

A: Five 

 

 

Q: Name something you hope your husband never loses           

A: His pants     

 

 

Q: Name something most people have only one of        

A: One set of grandparents

 

 

Q: Name a phrase starting with “Father” 

A: Stepfather    

 

 

Q: Name a fruit used in pies      

A: Squash

 

 

Q: Name a holiday where stores are always busy           

A: Monday       

 

 

Q: Name a type of movie that best describes your love life        

A: Exciting       

 

 

Q: Name something that can be smooth or bumpy         

A: Bread          

 

 

Q: The country that has the best music to dance to, besides the US       

A: Canada

 

 

Q: The one word people yell to their dog           

A: “Here, boy!”

 

 

Q: An occasion when a church might have standing room only.  

A: New Year’s Eve        

 

 

Q: Name a three letter word children first learn to spell   

A: Not  

 

 

Q: Name a country starting with “B”       

A: Bostonia

 

 

Q: One of Oprah’s favorite people        

A: Regis Kelly  

 

 

Q: Name something a woman buys to spice up the romance at home     

A: Whipped cream        

 

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More Of Those Awkward Moments – Life’s Great Levelers, part three.

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Another selection of those awkward moments we all experience as we journey through life. Some make you laugh, some make you angry, but all of them make you feel a little bit stupider that you really thought you were.

Enjoy.

 

 

That awkward moment when you realize you left the rest room with your dress tucked into your undies.

(Definitely haven’t managed that one yet, but I know someone who has.)

 

 

That awkward moment when you accidentally fart doing sit-ups at the Gym.

(Hey, another gold medal possibility if they make it an Olympic sport. For ‘accidentally’ read ‘inevitably’.)


 

 

That awkward moment when you see someone coming your way after you’ve just farted.

(Why do you think people take dogs with them for walks?)

 

 

That awkward moment when your girlfriend asks you if you love her more than your car.

(There’s only one answer to this one.)

 

 

That awkward moment when you bend down and your pants rip and you’re wearing floral underwear.

(Hello sailor!!!)

 

 

That awkward moment when you get caught in the rain in a cheesecloth dress, and really big underwear.

(I told you I don’t wear dresses, but seen it happen, very funny. Really big underwear, also known to us men folk as, ‘kidney warmers’. Sorry ladies.)

 

 

That awkward moment when someone walks in while you’re changing.

(Can be just as awkward when you walk in on someone else – or not – depending.)

 

 

That awkward moment when you confidently say the wrong answer aloud in class.

(And then try to turn the whole thing into a bad joke.)

 

 

That awkward moment when someone is doing the dishes and you slowly put another dish in the sink.

(Just do it with a smile and you’ll be okay. But only do it once.)

 

 

That awkward moment when you are trying to impress someone on the dance-floor but you dance into a pole.

(Prefer to watch other people dance where there are poles.)

 

 

That awkward moment when you think the trash can is a stool.

(So why hasn’t anyone invented a trash can that doubles as a stool – or is that a crap idea?)

 

 

The awkward moment when your friends make plans right in front of you, and the plans don’t include you.

(I can take a hint.)

 

 

That awkward moment when you’re so tired from taking a nap that you feel like to have to take another nap to get over your nap.

(Oh yes, the nap recovery nap nap!)

 

 

That awkward moment when you lose your bikini top in the surf.

(Not a problem for me, but I see the point…er..points??)

 

 

That awkward moment when you are on the beach and someone has told you that your tampon string is hanging out of your bikini.

(What does one do, and where does one do it?)

 

 

That awkward moment when you don’t know where to stand to pull your wedgie out without being noticed.

(Impossible to do without being seen. Impossible to do and still look elegant.)

 

 

That awkward moment when your neighbor starts talking to you while you’re hanging out your underwear.

(Hi there, washing the smalls today?)

 

 

That awkward moment when one heel flies off your high heels on the dance floor.

(It still baffles me why women wear high heels and how they can walk in them – or not, see videos.)

 

High heels fall 1

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High heels fall 2


 

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