“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”
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But of course something I do rate are puns.
Here’s some more.
Enjoy or endure!!!
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Polce Toay Announce They Are
Nvestgatng A Strng Of ID Thefts.
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I hate washing up liquid.
Washing up solids is much simpler.
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My girlfriend is leaving me because I’ve got alopecia.
oh well it’s hair loss.
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Cryptographers make terrible drummers.
They just sit there, fascinated by all the cymbals.
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My new job as a taxidermist is pretty boring.
All I do is sit around and stuff.
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My son is cold and calculating
I’ve turned the heating off whilst
he does his maths homework.
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Got an insurance quote today for my car.
They offered me a fire-and-theft policy.
I thought, “Who’d nick a car that was on fire?”
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“When might we take the kids to Disneyland?”
the wife asked me a few weeks ago.
I thought about it, and replied, “May.”
It’s been a blast watching her pack,
and the kids getting excited.
All I did was correct her grammar.
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A man walked over to a kid playing with a
huge lizard and asked if he could see it.
After fiddling around with it for a few moments,
he asked what its name was.
The kid replied with, “Tiny.”
“How on Earth did you ever get a name like that
for such a huge creature?” the man asked in awe.
The kid replied with, “Because he’s my newt!”
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My wife is a mute.
She communicates by embroidery.
It’s her own version of sign language,
sew to speak.
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I can’t believe they fired me from the clock factory
after all the extra hours I put in.
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I heard vandals have broken into
an origami exhibition
and ruined all the exhibits.
Police are trying to work out
how it all unfolded.
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My gym instructor pointed at fifteen heavy dumbbells
and told me I had to lift them all
over the next quarter of an hour.
Weight a minute…
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What do you call seafood in a cement mixer?
Hardcore prawn.
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News just in:
Stevie Nicks has announced her
engagement to William Shatner.
When they get married she will
be known as Stevie Shatner Nicks.
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fasab 