A Few Puzzles for Sunday

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Relax everything but your mind as you try this short selection of puzzles.

Not really difficult, but sometimes tricky, let’s see how you do.

Enjoy.

(Answers waaaaaaaayy down below as always, but no cheating!)

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What can run but never walks,

Often murmurs, never talks,

Has a mouth but never eats,

Has a bed but never sleeps?

———-

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What goes up

but never comes down?

———-

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I am a solitary word,

Only five letters long.

Behead me once, I am the same.

Behead me again, I am still the same.       

What am I?

———-

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Joe’s mom had four kids:

She named the first three Nickel, Dime, and Quarter

What did she name the fourth?

———-

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A cowboy rode into town on Friday,

stayed three days,

and rode out again on Friday.

How?

———-

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What has an engine and wheels and flies,

but is not an aircraft?

———-

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The more there is,

the less you see.

What is it?

———-

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I am not alive, yet I grow;

I have no lungs, yet I need air;

I have no mouth, yet I can drown.

What am I?

———-

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The more you take of me,

the more you leave behind.

What am I?

———-

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The man who made it doesn’t want it.

The man who bought it doesn’t need it.

The man who needs it doesn’t know it.

What is it?

———-

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I am a word

six letters in my name,

but take one away

and twelve remains.

What am I?

———-

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Throw me off the highest building,

and I shall not break,

but toss me in the smallest pool,

and my life’s at stake.

What am I?

———-

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I start going

and end up doing,

I finish everything,

and conclude nothing.

What am I?

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ANSWERS

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What can run but never walks,

Often murmurs, never talks,

Has a mouth but never eats,

Has a bed but never sleeps?

ANSWER:  A River

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What goes up

but never comes down?

ANSWER:  Age

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I am a solitary word,

Only five letters long.

Behead me once, I am the same.

Behead me again, I am still the same.

ANSWER:  Alone

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Joe’s mom had four kids:

She named the first three Nickel, Dime, and Quarter

What did she name the fourth?

ANSWER:  Joe

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A cowboy rode into town on Friday,

stayed three days,

and rode out again on Friday.

How?

ANSWER:  His horse’s name was Friday

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What has an engine and wheels and flies,

but is not an aircraft?

ANSWER:  A Garbage Truck

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The more there is,

the less you see.

What is it?

ANSWER:  Darkness

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I am not alive, yet I grow;

I have no lungs, yet I need air;

I have no mouth, yet I can drown.

What am I?

ANSWER:  Fire

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The more you take of me,

the more you leave behind.

What am I?

ANSWER:  Footsteps

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The man who made it doesn’t want it.

The man who bought it doesn’t need it.

The man who needs it doesn’t know it.

What is it?

ANSWER:  A Coffin

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I am a word

six letters in my name,

but take one away

and twelve remains.

What am I?

ANSWER:  Dozens

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Throw me off the highest building,

and I shall not break,

but toss me in the smallest pool,

and my life’s at stake.

What am I?

ANSWER:  A Tissue

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I start going

and end up doing,

I finish everything,

and conclude nothing.

What am I?

ANSWER:  The Letter ‘G’

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All You Have To Do Is Ask? Really??

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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They say that all you have to do is ask.

Well, I’m asking, so I guess the rest is up to you.

Here you go….

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Why doesn’t onomatopoeia sound like what it is?

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Does a fish get cramps after eating?

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Why is it when two planes almost hit each other it is called a near miss ? Shouldn’t it be called a near hit ?

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Why isn’t palindrome spelled the same way backwards?

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Why is it called TOOTHbrush when you brush all of your teeth?

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Why do fat chance and slim chance mean the same thing?

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If someone invented instant water, what would they mix it with?

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How did a fool and his money get together in the first place?

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Do cemetery workers prefer the graveyard shift?

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If carrots are so good for the eyes, how come I see so many dead rabbits on the highway

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Where does the fire go when the fire goes out?

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So what’s the speed of dark?

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Is reading in the bathroom considered Multi-Tasking?

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Why do grocery stores buy so many checkout line registers if they only keep 3 or 4 open?

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If anything’s possible, then is it possible that nothing’s possible?

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Does anyone actually kill two birds with one stone?

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Where in the nursery rhyme does it say humpty dumpty is an egg?

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More Of Those Questions That Are Well Worth Asking, But Nobody Bothers To Ask

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Well, apparently I was right, last week’s selection of questions that are worth asking, but nobody bothers to ask, weren’t life changing. But some people seemed to like them, so here is another batch for your consideration.

As usual, enjoy.

 

 

What can deaf people use instead of an Alarm Clock?

 

Why are Softballs hard?

 

Why aren’t Blueberry’s blue?

 

Do Butterfly’s make butter?

 

Does the Queen Bee have a King?

 

Can you carry a Kangaroo on your back?

 

Is a gold knife or fork still considered Silverware?

 

Why isn’t Chocolate considered a vegetable if it comes from Cocoa Beans?

 

What happens when you get ‘half scared to death’ twice?

 

Is it true cannibals don’t eat clowns because they taste funny?

 

If all the world’s a stage, where does the audience sit?

 

Why are the alphabets in the order that they are? Is it because it’s a song?

 

If you write a book about failure, and it doesn’t sell, is it called success?

 

If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?

 

If work is so terrific, how come they have to pay you to do it?

 

Are the good things that come to people who wait, the leftovers of people who went before them?

 

Why did Yankee Doodle name the feather in his hat Macaroni?

 

Isn’t Disney World a people trap operated by a mouse?

 

Why is Greenland called Greenland, when it’s white and covered with ice?

 

If something ‘goes without saying’, why do people still say it?

 

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Another Twenty Questions For Tuesday

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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You may discover the true meaning of life in today’s post (naw, okay, you probably won’t). Nevertheless here is a selection of questions that needed asking but that no one ever asks – until now, that is.

Enjoy.

 

 

Why do people say ‘the sky is the limit’ when there are footprints on the moon?

 

If a lawyer says to the judge “I’m Lying”, is he telling the truth?

 

Why do we call it ‘after dark’ when it’s really ‘after light’?

 

Why isn’t the number 11 pronounced ‘onety-one’?

 

What if the Hokey Pokey REALLY IS what it’s all about?

 

Why is there only 12 hours on a clock?

 

If you have sex with a prostitute against her will, is it considered rape or shoplifting?

 

How long is a piece of string?

 

Can animals commit suicide?

 

Why does the Easter bunny carry eggs? Rabbits don’t lay eggs!

 

Did London Bridge ever fall down?

 

Is it possible to be allergic to water?

 

Why do super-heroes wear their underwear on the outside of their clothes?

 

Why are women and men’s shoe sizes different?

 

What was the best thing BEFORE sliced bread?

 

How do you make seven even?

 

Why do they call it a ‘Television Set’ when there’s only one?

 

How fast do you need to cook for it to be considered ‘Fast Food’?

 

Where does the ‘o’ come from when we abbreviate the word ‘number’?

 

Why do they imply the ‘birds and the bees’ get up to something together?

 

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Twenty Questions Tuesday

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Like this time last week this is a test that isn’t a test. Just a series of questions that will hopefully make you think and make you smile. Although you don’t hear them asked very often, if at all, some of the questions are quite reasonable.

If you find you can answer any or all of them, then well done.

As usual, enjoy.

 

 

Why does a round pizza come in a square box?

 

What disease did cured ham actually have?

 

How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?

 

Why is it that people say they ‘slept like a baby’ when babies wake up like every two hours?

 

If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?

 

Why are you ‘IN’ a movie, but you’re ‘ON’ TV?

 

Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?

 

Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They’re going to see you naked anyway.

 

Why is ‘bra’ singular and ‘panties’ plural?

 

Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

 

If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?

 

Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane ?

 

If the professor on Gilligan’s Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can’t he fix a hole in a boat?

 

Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They’re both dogs!

 

If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME stuff, why didn’t he just buy dinner?

 

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

 

Why do they call it an asteroid when it’s outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it’s in your ass?

 

Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog’s face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?

 

Do the ‘Alphabet song’ and ‘Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star’ have the same tune?

 

Why did you just try singing the two songs above?

 

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Testing Tuesday

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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First, let me put your mind at rest, today is a test that isn’t really a test, so don’t worry.

Instead I have a selection of twenty curious questions, some of which can be answered, others perhaps not.

But they are worth thinking about, and, they might, I hope, make you smile too.

Enjoy!

 

 

1.  Why doesn’t glue stick to the inside of the bottle?

 

2.  Is it wrong for a vegetarian to eat animal crackers?

 

3.  If people from Poland are called ‘poles’ are people from Holland called ‘holes’?

 

4.  Can you cry under water?

 

5.  Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?

 

6.  What is another word for thesaurus?

 

7.  Why is ‘abbreviation’ such a long word?

 

8.  What do they use to ship styrofoam?

 

9.  When sign makers go on strike, what do their signs say?

 

10. Is it okay to shoot tourists during tourist season?

 

11. Why can’t we tickle ourselves?

 

12. Why does the word ‘monosyllabic’ have five syllables?

 

13. Why do they call a building a ‘building’ when it is already built?

 

14. If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest have to drown, too?

 

15. If honesty is the best policy, then is dishonesty the second best policy?

 

16. If a word is misspelled in the dictionary, how will anyone ever know?

 

17. If Harry Potter has magical power, why does he need to wear glasses?

 

18. How important does a person have to be before they are considered ‘assassinated’ instead of just ‘murdered’?

 

19. Why do you have to ‘put your two cents in’… but it’s only get a ‘penny for your thoughts’? Where’s that extra penny going to?

 

20. Once you’re in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?

 

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