“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”
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Some more newspaper headlines today.
It’s quite amazing the capacity people have to get things wrong.
Worse if the result is on view to the general public.
Here is the latest batch.
Enjoy.
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“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”
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I’ve been doing puns for a while now and it seems that a lot of other people like them too. I just can’t figure out the reason. I mean the jokes themselves are, to say the least, sometimes contrived and quite bad. Yet people groan, grimace and laugh and come back for more – me included, I’m just not sure why.
If you think you have the answer do let me know.
Meantime enjoy this week’s selection.
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The other day someone left a piece of silly putty in my house. I didn’t know what to make of it.
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My wife has left me because I am a compulsive gambler. I’d do anything to win her back.
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Some people are making Rapture jokes like there’s no tomorrow.
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Tea is for mugs.
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Did you hear about the physics student who couldn’t understand quantum theory? He was thicker than a Planck!
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A woman was attacked by a troupe of mime artists. They performed unspeakable acts on her.
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Wind turbines. I’m a big fan.
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NBC News: Two pedestrians die in collision. How fast must they have been walking?
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Don’t you just hate it when people think there clever but use the wrong grammar?
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Iraq drastically needs to reduce its car bomb footprint.
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A book just fell on my head. I’ve only got myshelf to blame.
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“So, how’s life in North Korea?”
“Well, I can’t complain.”
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How do you find a blind man in a nudist colony? It’s not hard.
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Cocaine is never a solution. Unless, of course, you dissolve it in water.
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I got a phone call from electric company to say my bill was outstanding. I said, “Thanks!”
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I often say to myself, “I can’t believe that cloning machine worked!”
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When my girlfriend said she was leaving because of my obsession with The Monkees, I thought she was joking. And then I saw her face.
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“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”
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We’ve touched on this subject before but there are far, far too many idiots allowed to be put in charge of motor vehicles. Inevitably these morons at one time or more end up crashing, sometimes it is a solo effort, at other times they take some other unfortunate with them.
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However it happens, the inevitable result as well as the police becoming involved is that the insurance companies are quickly brought on board to fight the cases.
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Here are a few descriptions given by some intellectually challenged drivers to their insurance companies trying to explain the mayhem that they had caused.
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Poor doggie. You’ll see what I mean.
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Coming home I drove into the wrong house and collided with a tree I don’t have.
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I told the police that I was not injured, but on removing my hat found that I had a fractured skull.
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I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother-in-law and headed over the embankment.
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I thought my window was down, but I found it was up when I put my head through it.
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As I approached an intersection a sign suddenly appeared in a place where no stop sign had ever appeared before. I was unable to stop in time to avoid the accident.
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In an attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone pole.
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I saw two kangaroos having it off in the middle of the road. So I hit them, which caused me to ejaculate through the sunroof.
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I was thrown from my car as it left the road. I was later found in a ditch by some stray cows.
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The telephone pole was approaching. I was attempting to swerve out of the way when I struck the front end.
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I pulled in to the side of the road because there was smoke coming from under the hood. I realized there was a fire in the engine, so I took my dog and smothered it with a blanket.
fasab 