April Fools!

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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I know it’s June but you will see later why the title says April. The fools bit is appropriate all year round for these guys as will also become clear.

Now for the story.

A cunning master criminal and his accomplice were caught after a burglary attempt at a place of business in Maplewood, Minnesota, thanks to an alert police dispatcher and a real dumb-ass criminal.

As a result Todd J. Weiss 32, from Minnetonka and his sidekick Justin G. Evans, 38, from Savage, were arrested at the scene. Both face third-degree felony burglary charges.

The incident took place around 4:45 a.m. April 1 (Fools Day appropriately enough, hence the title).

Maplewood Police Chief Paul Schnell said a 911 dispatcher first got a call and hang-up, then another call from the same number.

The second time, the call stayed open. The dispatcher overheard pieces of a conversation about where police were and the dangers of getting caught.

“If it goes off, they are right across the street,” one of the men said, according to the charges.

Police Chief Schnell said it was “pretty clear based on some of that conversation that this was a burglary”.

The phone had been in Weiss’s pocket and whatever he was doing at the time, he had inadvertently pressed the phone’s emergency-call feature, twice!!

As with all 911 calls, the dispatcher could see the location of the caller, in this case a car-repair shop at White Bear Avenue and County Road D.

Officers arrived to see the two men leaving the building wearing dark clothing, the charges said. One was carrying a television, the other a box.

Upon seeing the officers, the men dropped their booty and ran for it. Officers ordered them to stop, then sent police dogs to nab them.

Weiss refused to speak to police after he was read his Miranda rights. Evans said he had taken more than a dozen Xanax and the police report confirmed that he “appeared to be under the influence of the substance”.

He denied being inside the business, saying he was outside behind nearby apartments having relations with his girlfriend.

Both men’s criminal histories include burglary and theft, according to Minnesota court records.

Police Chief Schnell rightly praised the 911 operator, but it has to be said that morons like these who phone 911 while burglarizing a property make it a bit too easy for the cops to catch them.

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Todd Joseph Weiss
Todd Joseph Weiss

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“So What Do you Think Of These?”, He Asked Quizzically!

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Quiz day again folks.

Another random set of questions, some quite easy, others rather difficult and a couple of tricky ones thrown in for good measure.

But there’s no pass mark and no pressure so why not give them a go?

And, as usual, if you get stuck you can find the answers waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay down below, but please, NO cheating!

Enjoy and good luck.

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Quiz 07

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Q.  1:  The name of which capital city is also contained in the title of a movie starring Frank Sinatra?

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Q.  2:  What was the surname (last name) and the nicknames of the father and son who controlled Haiti from 1957 to 1986? (A point for each correct answer, so three points up for grabs.)

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Q.  3:  On which mountain did Noah’s Ark come to rest as the Great Flood subsided?

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Q.  4:  Who was the biggest selling female singer in America in the 1990s?

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Q.  5:  There are many examples of countries in the world that are land-locked, that is surrounded by several other countries, but there are three countries that are completely surrounded by one other country only, a point for each that you can name and a bonus point if you can name all three.

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Q.  6:  Why was Louise Brown famous in 1978?

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Q.  7:  What is the longest river in Australia?

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Q.  8:  In which well known movie would you find the robot or android known as ‘Ash’?

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Q.  9:  In which country did the soup known as ‘Waterzooi’ originate?

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Q. 10:  Two South American countries have no coastline, name them. (A point for each.)

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Q. 11:  Who or what was ‘The African Queen’ in the movie of the same name?

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Q. 12:  What does the yummy breakfast treat ‘Eggs Benedict’ consist of?

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Q. 13:  Which Canadian newspaper magnate held important Government Offices in England during World War I and World War II?

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Q. 14:  Who played ‘Herman Munster’ in the long running CBS Sitcom?

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Q. 15:  Which former American President left behind an immortal souvenir – the teddy -which was named after him?

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Q. 16:  Orson Welles stated of him that his movie ‘The General’ was “the greatest comedy ever made, the greatest Civil War film ever made, and perhaps the greatest film ever made.” Of whom was he speaking?

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Q. 17:  According to Greek mythology whose box contained all the evils of the world?

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Q. 18:  He was born in Poland and emigrated to Palestine in 1906. He became the first Prime Minister of the State of Israel. Who was he?

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Q. 19:  Who wrote 2001 ‘A Space Odyssey’?

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Q. 20:  What is the name of the largest river in Saudi Arabia?

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ANSWERS

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Q.  1:  The name of which capital city is also contained in the title of a movie starring Frank Sinatra?

A.  1:  Rome, Italy and the movie ‘Tony Rome’.

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Q.  2:  What was the surname (last name) and the nicknames of the father and son who controlled Haiti from 1957 to 1986? (A point for each correct answer, so three points up for grabs.)

A.  2:  Dr Francois Duvalier known as ‘Papa Doc’ (1957-1971) and his son Jean-Claude known as ‘Bébé Doc’ (1971-1986).

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Q.  3:  On which mountain did Noah’s Ark come to rest as the Great Flood subsided?

A.  3:  Mt. Ararat.

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Q.  4:  Who was the biggest selling female singer in America in the 1990s?

A.  4:  Mariah Carey.

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Q.  5:  There are many examples of countries in the world that are land-locked, that is surrounded by several other countries, but there are three countries that are completely surrounded by one other country only, a point for each that you can name and a bonus point if you can name all three.

A.  5:  Vatican City, and San Marino, both surrounded by Italy and  Lesotho surrounded by South Africa.

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Q.  6:  Why was Louise Brown famous in 1978?

A.  6:  She was the world’s first test-tube baby.

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Q.  7:  What is the longest river in Australia?

A.  7:  The Murray River

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Q.  8:  In which well known movie would you find the robot or android known as ‘Ash’?

A.  8:  ‘Ash’ was the robot/android in the movie ‘Alien’.

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Q.  9:  In which country did the soup known as ‘Waterzooi’ originate?

A.  9:  Belgium.

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Q. 10:  Two South American countries have no coastline, name them. (A point for each.)

A. 10:  Bolivia and Paraguay.

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Q. 11:  Who or what was ‘The African Queen’ in the movie of the same name?

A. 11:  ‘The African Queen’ was a boat.

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Q. 12:  What does the yummy breakfast treat ‘Eggs Benedict’ consist of?

A. 12:  ‘Eggs Benedict’ consists of two halves of an English muffin, topped with ham or bacon, poached eggs, and Hollandaise sauce.

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Q. 13:  Which Canadian newspaper magnate held important Government Offices in England during World War I and World War II?

A. 13:  Lord Beaverbrook.

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Q. 14:  Who played ‘Herman Munster’ in the long running CBS Sitcom?

A. 14:  Fred Gwynne.

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Q. 15:  Which former American President left behind an immortal souvenir – the teddy -which was named after him?

A. 15:  Theodore Roosevelt

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Q. 16:  Orson Welles stated of him that his movie ‘The General’ was “the greatest comedy ever made, the greatest Civil War film ever made, and perhaps the greatest film ever made.” Of whom was he speaking?

A. 16:  Joseph Frank “Buster” Keaton.

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Q. 17:  According to Greek mythology whose box contained all the evils of the world?

A. 17:  Pandora’s.

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Q. 18:  He was born in Poland and emigrated to Palestine in 1906. He became the first Prime Minister of the State of Israel. Who was he?

A. 18:  David Ben Gurion.

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Q. 19:  Who wrote 2001 ‘A Space Odyssey’?

A. 19:  Arthur C Clarke.

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Q. 20:  What is the name of the largest river in Saudi Arabia?

A. 20:  A bit of a tricky one to end with, there are no rivers in Saudi Arabia. Score a point if you said zero or none.

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Did You Know? More From The Strange Fact File

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Here is another very random selection of strange facts from fasab’s files.

As with other in this series, by the time you have read these you will know more than you did and possible more than you want to.

But have a look anyway.

Enjoy.

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The adult electric eel can produce a five hundred volt shock,

which is enough to stun a horse

– and I don’t mean a seahorse!

electric eel

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As an iceberg melts, it makes a fizzing sound
because of the compressed air bubbles popping in the ice

iceberg

Kermit the frog delivered the commencement address

at Southampton College located in the state of New York in 1996

Kermit

The mythical Scottish town of Brigadoon

appears for one day every one hundred years

Brigadoon

A rainbow can occur only when the sun

is 40 degrees or less above the horizon

rainbow

The most common injury caused by cosmetics

is to the eye by a mascara wand

mascara-wand

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The sound made by the toadfish when mating underwater

is so loud that it can be heard by humans on the shore

toadfish

In America, approximately 20% of children between

the ages of 2 – 7 have televisions in their rooms

cartoon-tv-man

Families who do turn off the television during meals tend to eat healthier.

This was regardless of family income, or education

healthy-eating1

Two out of five people end up marrying their first love

first love

Forty-one percent of women apply body and

hand moisturizer at least three times a day

woman-applying-moisturizer

Scientists have determined that having guilty feelings

may actually damage your immune system

Feeling Guilty after Eating pactket in my Papperoni__

The first box of Crayola that was ever sold

had the same eight colours that are sold in the box today

consisting of red, blue, yellow, green, violet, orange, black and brown.

The box was sold for a nickel in 1903

CrayolaCrayons24CtOpenBox

The best time for a person to buy shoes is in the afternoon.

This is because the foot tends to swell a bit around this time

swollen_feet_by_jerrykongart-d388jbm

According to psychologists, the shoe and the foot

are the most common sources of sexual fetishism in Western society

foot fetish

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Bank robber John Dillinger played professional baseball

dillinger baseball
John Dillinger top left

The first company to mass produce teddy bears was the Ideal Toy Company

ideal-toy-corp-teddy-bear-1910

Flight pioneer and pilot, Orville Wright,

was involved in the first aircraft accident.

His passenger was killed.

Orville Wright crash

The mother of famous astronomer Johannes Kepler

was accused of being a witch

Johannes_Kepler_1610
Johannes Kepler 1610

In the past 60 years, the groundhog has only predicted

the weather correctly 28% of the time.

The rushing back and forth from burrows

is believed to indicate sexual activity, not shadow seeking

groundhog

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Say What You Want, You Really Like ‘Em

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Yes, some of you pretend not to, but come on, admit it, I know you really like these awful jokes dressed up as puns and word plays.

Here’s another lot for you to pretend to hate!

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Bill used to date an English teacher, but she dumped him.

She didn’t approve of his improper use of the colon.

Colon

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What’s better than seeing a woman wrestle?

Seeing her box.

Two Wrestling Women

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I had an appointment at the sperm bank today, but I had to call up to say I couldn’t come.

sperm bank

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I asked a pretty, young, homeless woman if I could take her home, and she said yes with a big smile.

The look on her face soon changed when I walked off with her cardboard box.

homeless-condo

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I had a crazy dream that I weighed less than a thousandth of a gram.

I was like, 0mg!

omg

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My girlfriend just said to me, “Did you know, butterflies only live for two days?”

I said, “Honey, I think that’s a myth.”

She said, “No, it’s definitely a butterfly.”

cartoon_butterfly

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I think jokes about fat people are horrible.

Don’t you think they have enough on their plate?

I beat anorexia

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I shot someone with a starting gun.

I’ve been charged with race crimes

starting pistol

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I got an e-mail saying ‘At Google Earth we can read maps backwards!’

I thought, “That’s just spam.”

spam

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Capitalization is the difference between

“I helped my uncle Jack off a horse,”

and

“I helped my uncle jack off a horse.”

capitalization

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Call it a hunch, but I’m pretty sure I have an abnormal convex curvature of the upper spine.

hunch-back

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My brother came out of the closet today.

I knew I should have used a better lock.

out of the closet

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The other day I saw a man playing Dancing Queen on the Didgeridoo.

I thought, that’s Aboriginal.

Abba cartoon

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