Saturn In A Bathtub? Just One Of Today’s Facts!

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Yes, the usual unusual mixture of facts for you today.

You’ll have a job trying to get Saturn into a bathtub, but in the meantime there are a lot of other facts to explore.

Enjoy.

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If you could put Saturn in a bathtub it would float.

(But you will need a very large bathtub.)

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If saliva cannot dissolve something,

you cannot taste it.

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Your brain accounts for about 2% of your mass

but uses up to a quarter of your oxygen and energy

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Chocolate contains phenylethylamine,

a naturally occurring amino-acid

which is believed to have aphrodisiacal effects

and is even said to be able to “cure” hangovers.

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Roger Woodward goes down in history

as the youngest person to go over the

Niagara Falls unprotected and survive.

It was unintentional and happened

after a boat he was in capsized.

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Marc Okrand, the linguistics professor responsible

for coming up with the fictional language of Klingon,

spent 3 years teaching his son when he was little.

His son went on to forget everything.

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At its height in 480BC the first Persian Empire

covered 44% of the world’s population.

This is the largest percentage of any empire in history.

By comparison the British only had 20%

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Life expectancy in the middle ages wasn’t as low as you think.

The average age was brought down

but that was mostly because of a high infant mortality rate.

Most adults lived well into their 60s.

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Animal Kingdom was supposed to have had

a land devoted to mythical creatures,

but it was abandoned at the last minute.

However, no one thought about

changing the Animal Kingdom sign,

which still includes a dragon

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Gorgias of Epirus, a Greek teacher

was born in his dead mother’s coffin.

The pallbearers heard him crying during the burial.

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Heresy comes from a Greek word meaning choice

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JFK was a huge James Bond fan.

He first met the author of the series,

Ian Fleming, at a dinner party in 1960.

They allegedly bounced around ideas

about how to get rid of Fidel Castro.

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The world’s highest road is the Aucanquilcha mining road.

This mining road was once used by trucks

to climb this Chilean volcano to an altitude of over 6,000 meters.

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In ancient Rome, urine was used as mouthwash.

(Now that really is taking the piss!)

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The musical Grease is one of the highest grossing of all time

with receipts Worldwide of $394,955,690.

I think this is the one that you want….

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Did You Know? July’s Facts Start Here.

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Yes, July’s start here.

Another random selection of curious pieces of information.

And another chance for you to find a few things to tell people at the next barby!

Enjoy.

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In Disney’s “Fantasia”, the Sorcerer’s name is

“Yensid”, which is “Disney” backwards.

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The Mongolian navy consists of

seven people and one boat.

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The pavement between the different ‘worlds’ in the Disney parks changes suddenly.

These sensory ‘tickles’ startle you and make you look up and look around,

realizing that your surroundings have changed.

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In 1788

the Austrian army accidentally attacked itself

and lost 10,000 men

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The attachment of human muscles to skin

is what causes dimples.

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Nightmare comes from an old English word “mare”

that refers to a demon who suffocates you in your sleep

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Eisenhower played a big role in popularizing golf.

He installed a putting green at the White House

and played more than 800 rounds while in office

— exceeding the record of any other president.

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Other than humans, black lemurs are the only

primates that may have blue eyes.

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Sheriff came from Shire Reeve.

During early years of feudal rule in England,

each shire had a reeve who was the law for that shire.

When the term was brought to the United States

it was shortned to Sheriff.

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Iowa has more independent telephone companies

than any other state.

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Murphy’s Oil Soap is the chemical most

commonly used to clean elephants.

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Artist Constantino Brumidi

fell from the dome of the U.S. Capitol

while painting a mural around the rim.

He died four months later.

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There were no squirrels on Nantucket until 1989.

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Blueberry Jelly Bellies were created

especially for Ronald Reagan.

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Cathy Rigby is the only woman

to pose nude for Sports Illustrated.

(August 1972)

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As A Rule Of Thumb, Don’t Pick Up Hitchhikers.

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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But as a rule of thumb I like puns.

Hope you do too.

Here are some more.

Enjoy!

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My Japanese penpal dropped out of school recently.

He’s taken leave of his Senseis.

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I’ve got a new job stacking shelves at a supermarket for big, tall men.

It keeps me on my toes.

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I was chatting to someone about cylindrical fasteners earlier,

it was a riveting conversation.

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Skiers don’t have drunken arguments,

they just storm off-piste.

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I used to be the managing director of the world’s largest ladder company.

Until I was asked to step down.

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A friend asked if I wanted to buy his motor boat.

I jumped at the chance and bought both.

I can keep the boat on the moat.

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My friend sells knives for a living and he said if I posted

this on the internet he’d give me a cut.

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What numbskull called it the Police / Fire Department Headquarters

and not Guns and Hoses?

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I went for a job interview with the hacking group Anonymous.

Introduced myself…

And that was the end of the interview

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Just read in the news, that there’s going to be a beauty contest

where all the models are dressed up in newspaper pages.

It must be a Miss Print.

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The A- eam.

Hey, missed a T.

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I went through a lot to be with my girlfriend.

She was standing at the other end of the car park.

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I wish I’d never joined the S and M club.

They tied me into a long term contract.

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A driver waved at me to stop my car and asked if I could change attire.

Why would someone assume that I would keep spare clothes with me!

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Heck is where people go to

who don’t believe in Golly.

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Something tells me my posture might not be so great,

I don’t know.

I just have a hunch.

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Two red blood cells met and fell in love.

But alas, it was in vein.

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My fruit and vegetable business has gone into liquidation.

Now we sell smoothies.

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Man, you get a load of boos when

you turn up to an AA meeting pissed.

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I turned up to a McDonald’s job interview

riding piggyback on a Burger King employee.

“Could I just ask what the hell you’re doing?”

the receptionist asked curtly.

“Well,” I explained patiently, “the woman on the phone told me

I should report to Reception on a rival” 

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I Never Contradict Myself, But I Do Sometimes.

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Yes, another day to play with words, or on words, or perhaps a bit of both.

Whatever you think is more appropriate, enjoy!

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“Welcome to the society of people scared of decimal numbers.”

“I’m glad I managed to round you all up”

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Two communists in a nudist camp.

One says to other “have you read marx comrade?”

The other replied “Yes I think its the wicker furniture.”

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The photocopier in my office broke.

So I called in my secretary, Tracey.

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It might be me, but I just can’t think

of a better word to describe myself.

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Norman Bates, motel, shower, stab, blood,

Alfred Hitchcock, secretary, mother, knife,

Janet Leigh, bank, steal.

That’s just Psychobabble.

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When I worked at the funfair I used to think

that life was all swings and roundabouts.

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I went crazy after I couldn’t open the new door I’d just fitted.

In hindsight I should have handled it better.

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My teacher asked me to name all the presidents,

which is ridiculous as they already have names.

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I had a scary moment when I was taking the packaging off

my expensive new bookcase with a sharp knife.

I damn near slit my shelf.

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My wife couldn’t believe she got sacked for

misplacing the company’s new storefront sign.

She’s lost four words.

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Someone just robbed me and stole my watch.

I would have chased them,

but I didn’t have the time.

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It’s the final of the Microwave Challenge Contest tonight.

Things will get heated.

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My English teacher accused me of plagiarizing everything I write.

I didn’t make this up.

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Hollywood producers are in talks with Dustin Hoffman

to star in a film about a Zulu warrior who dresses as a woman

to try and make it as an actor.

They’re going to call it Tutsi.

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Workers protested at a bread factory

in France because of their low income.

Their manager comes up and says,

“No pain, no gain.”

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I used to own a laxatives company.

Business was hard at first and it was eventually liquidated.

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“Well we’re not getting on your big boat.”

the two Unicorns told Noah.

It was anarchy.

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Just bought a really basic pair of shears.

They’re not cutting hedge anyway.

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I did some work experience at a drug rehab centre.

They were very thorough: they left no intern stoned.

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The last wedding I was invited to went off without a hitch.

The groom didn’t turn up.

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The September Quizzes Begin Here.

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Month nine of 2013 and quiz number – I don’t know how many – but here’s another one anyway.

Usual random mixture and answers to be found waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay down below, but please, NO cheating!

Enjoy.

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Q.  1: The name of which famous band is also the Aramaic word for ‘the father, my father’?

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Q.  2:  Which popular beverage’s name is the German word for ‘to store’?

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Q.  3:  Cruciverbalists get down sometimes when they get their meaning across. What are cruciverbalists?

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Q.  4:  How many zeros are in one trillion when written out in numerical form?

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Q.  5:  In which US City was the TV police show ‘Cagney and Lacy’ set?

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Q.  6:  In which movies do each of the following play a missionary? (A point for each correct answer)

    a. Katherine Hepburn

    b. Jeremy Irons

    c. Jack Hawkins

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Q.  7:  In which fictional town did the ‘Flintstones’ live?

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Q.  8:  Which modern means of transport now usually replaces the richly adorned but antiquated and impractical ‘Sedia Gestatoria’?

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Q.  9:  Which two contributions to western tea culture were introduced by US tea merchants, one at the St. Louis world fair in 1904, the other in New York restaurants in 1908?  (A point for each)

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Q. 10:  Which sport legend was given the nickname ‘Le Crocodil’?

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Q. 11:  A plot element in a movie is often called which one of the following?

    a. Macbeth

    b. Macduff

    c. MacGuffin

    d. Macleod

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Q. 12:  Who began her show with the words ‘I was born in the Bronx in New York, in December 1941’?

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Q. 13:  In Japan, what is a ‘Gaijin’?

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Q. 14:  On a standard dart board, what is the lowest number that cannot be scored with a single dart?

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Q. 15:  Which millionaire first introduced a free school milk program in Chicago to combat rickets?

    a. Al Capone

    b. Richard W. Sears

    c. Hugh Hefner

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Q. 16:  Which vegetable has the most calories?

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Q. 17:  What was the name of Jacques Cousteau’s boat?

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Q. 18:  Which chivalrous expression is closely associated with the sinking of the HMS Birkenhead in Febuary 1852?

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Q. 19:  Who played ‘Blake Carrington’ in the TV series Dynasty and was also the voice of the ‘boss’ in Charlie’s Angels?

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Q. 20:  Still used today, what is the very popular, though sometimes frightening Anglo Saxon word meaning ‘pledge’? Three letters

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ANSWERS

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Q.  1: The name of which famous band is also the Aramaic word for ‘the father, my father’?

A.  1:  Abba

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Q.  2:  Which popular beverage’s name is the German word for ‘to store’?

A.  2:  Lager.

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Q.  3:  Cruciverbalists get down sometimes when they get their meaning across. What are cruciverbalists?

A.  3:  Creators or lovers of crossword puzzles

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Q.  4:  How many zeros are in one trillion when written out in numerical form?

A.  4:  12  (1,000,000,000,000)

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Q.  5:  In which US City was the TV police show ‘Cagney and Lacy’ set?

A.  5:  New York.

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Q.  6:  In which movies do each of the following play a missionary? (A point for each correct answer)

    a. Katherine Hepburn

    b. Jeremy Irons

    c. Jack Hawkins

A.  6:    a. Katherine Hepburn in ‘The African Queen’

            b. Jeremy Irons in ‘The Mission’

            c. Jack Hawkins in ‘Zulu’

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Q.  7:  In which fictional town did the ‘Flintstones’ live?

A.  7:  Bedrock.

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Q.  8:  Which modern means of transport now usually replaces the richly adorned but antiquated and impractical ‘Sedia Gestatoria’?

A.  8:  The ‘Popemobile(s)’

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Q.  9:  Which two contributions to western tea culture were introduced by US tea merchants, one at the St. Louis world fair in 1904, the other in New York restaurants in 1908?  (A point for each)

A.  9:  Ice tea (1904) and tea bags (1908)

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Q. 10:  Which sport legend was given the nickname ‘Le Crocodil’?

A. 10:  Rene Lacoste

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Q. 11:  A plot element in a movie is often called which one of the following?

    a. Macbeth

    b. Macduff

    c. MacGuffin

    d. Macleod

A. 11:  Answer c. it is called a MacGuffin

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Q. 12:  Who began her show with the words ‘I was born in the Bronx in New York, in December 1941’?

A. 12:  Rhoda.

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Q. 13:  In Japan, what is a ‘Gaijin’?

A. 13:  A foreigner. Gaijin means ‘outside person’.

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Q. 14:  On a standard dart board, what is the lowest number that cannot be scored with a single dart?

A. 14:  23

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Q. 15:  Which millionaire first introduced a free school milk program in Chicago to combat rickets?

    a. Al Capone

    b. Richard W. Sears

    c. Hugh Hefner

A. 15:  Answer a. Al Capone

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Q. 16:  Which vegetable has the most calories?

A. 16:  Avocado.

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Q. 17:  What was the name of Jacques Cousteau’s boat?

A. 17:  The Calypso.

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Q. 18:  Which chivalrous expression is closely associated with the sinking of the HMS Birkenhead in Febuary 1852?

A. 18:  ‘Women and children first’

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Q. 19:  Who played ‘Blake Carrington’ in the TV series Dynasty and was also the voice of the ‘boss’ in Charlie’s Angels?

A. 19:  John Forsythe

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Q. 20:  Still used today, what is the very popular, though sometimes frightening Anglo Saxon word meaning ‘pledge’? Three letters

A. 20:  Wed

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Check This One Out: 1

 “Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Once again the clue to today’s post was in the title.

And since you checked the one in the title out why not check the rest of them out too.

Here is the latest selection of puns for you to endure or hopefully, enjoy.

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Tell you what floats my boat.

Water.

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What do houseflies and Mac users have in common?

Neither of them understand how Windows work.

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Is it true that an apple a day keeps the doctor away…

or is it just one of Granny’s myths?

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I for one…

…but that’s Roman numerals for you.

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I knew a guy who fell into an industrial grinding machine.

He’s fine now.

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I have no beef with vegetarians.

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I slipped on some dog s**t the other day.

It didn’t suit me though.

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I hate it how people keep texting me “k”.

I am very rarely in the mood to talk about potassium.

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I bought some biscuits yesterday, on the packet it said,

“Store in a cool place.”

So I mailed them to Samuel L. Jackson’s house.

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When I was a kid people used to cover me

in cream and put a cherry on my head,

it was tough being brought up in the gateau.    

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I bought a CD which was just the sound of water flowing.

I didn’t like it though, it was too main-stream.

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A bartender drowned in a tidal wave of tonic water after a case exploded,

he was schwepped away.

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There’s a fine line between a numerator and a denominator. 

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Ten words, two commas, an exclamation mark

and a period all appeared in court yesterday…

They’re due to be sentenced next week.

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The other day, an attendant stopped me in a hospital car park to tell me,

“You can’t park here. It’s badge holders only.”

I replied, “But I have got a bad shoulder.”

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Do you think “Gone With The Wind”

started out as just a draft?

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I was pulled over by the police today.

“How fast do you think you were going, sir?”

“60mph?” I asked.

“Try 135,” the officer replied.

So I shut the door and drove as fast as I could.

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The French are concerned that 77% of their electricity comes from nuclear power.

I think they should stop over-reacting.

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I’m scared of trampolines.

They make me jump.

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At last I’ve found out the reason that women ask so many questions.

Apparently they have an extra why chromosome.

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More Facts – And That’s A Fact!

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Welcome to another selection of random facts and the chance to prepare yourself for questions that you may never be asked.

Enjoy.

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While in Alcatraz, Al Capone was inmate 85.

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The airport scene at the end of classic movie “Casablanca”

was produced using a cardboard model of a plane

and little people actors in the background!!

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Donkeys kill more people than plane crashes.

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The White House has 32 bathrooms,

and 6 levels to accommodate all the people

who live in, work in, and visit the White House.

There are also 412 doors, 147 windows,

28 fireplaces, 7 staircases, and 3 elevators.

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Hummingbirds are the only animals that can fly backwards.

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In the great fire of London in 1666 half of London was burnt down

but only 6 people were injured.

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Women blink nearly twice as much as men.

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Each year there is one ton of cement poured

for each man woman and child in the world.

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The most common name in Italy is Mario Rossi.

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Fingernails grow nearly 4 times faster than toenails!

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Rugby, North Dakota is the geographical center of North America.

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Butte County, South Dakota is the geographical center of the U.S.

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No matter where you stand in Michigan,

you are never more than 85 miles from a Great Lake.

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The number “four” is considered unlucky in Japan

because it is pronounced the same as “death”.

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Sylvia Miles had the shortest performance

ever nominated for an Oscar with “Midnight Cowboy.”

Her entire role lasted only six minutes.

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You’re more likely to get stung by a bee

on a windy day than in any other weather.

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The world’s deepest hole is the Sakhali I oil well in Russia

(part owned by Exxon Mobil) which is 12.345 Km. deep (7.67 miles).

Previously to this the Al Shaheen oil well (12.29km or 7.64 miles)

dug in Qatar was the deepest oil well.

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Spain leads the world in cork production

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A jail in Brazil allows its inmates to pedal exercise bikes

to power lights in a nearby town in exchange for reduced sentences.

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The Boston University Bridge

(on Commonwealth Avenue, Boston, Massachusetts)

is the only place in the world where a boat can sail under a train

driving under a car driving under an airplane.

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Perfectly Timed Photos, Part Five

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Welcome to another weekend and the final selection of perfectly timed photographs.

Since this is the last in this short series I am going to let the animals have the final word, or the final look might be more accurate.

Below is a mixture of domesticated and wild animals all caught on camera at exactly the right moment in time to produce fascinating and sometimes very funny pictures.

Hope you enjoy this final (for the moment) selection.

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What Do Stupid Politicians And Bureaucrats Make? Yes, That’s Right – Stupid Laws

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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If you were ever in any doubt, let me assure you that when you elect morons to positions where they can legislate for the rest of us then you are assured that they will spend their time and our money making stupid laws, rules and regulations.

It happens in every country and in every state in every country. Such is the horrendous scale of the problem that I would be blogging forever if I tried to highlight worldwide stupidity, so as an example let’s look at some of the lesser known laws that govern citizens in the United States of America (I will list them state by state alphabetically. Part one today is A to L).

Enjoy (or cringe, perhaps).

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ALABAMA

• It is considered an offense to open an umbrella on a street, for fear of spooking horses. 
• In Alabama, it is against the law to wear a fake mustache that could cause laughter in the church. 
• A voter spending more than four minutes in a voting booth can be asked to hurry up.

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ALASKA

• No one may tie their pet dog to the roof of a car.
• A clumsy or unknowledgeable person may not use a ski-lift.
• Owners of flamingos may not let their pet into barber shops.
• It is a crime to deceive a machine.

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ARIZONA

• Hunting camels is prohibited.
• It is illegal to buy a human egg in order to clone yourself.
• You may not leave a fishing pole unattended.
• Donkeys cannot sleep in bathtubs.
• You may not have more than two dildos in a house.
  

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ARKANSAS

• A man can legally beat his wife, but not more than once a month. (Ridiculous idea!)
• Dogs may not bark after 6 PM. (How about a “woof”?) 
• It is against the law to own a dangerous cat.

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CALFORNIA

• The Shell Egg Advisory Committee must have seven members.
• City Council order reads: “No dog shall be in a public place without its master on a leash.” (A little bit of role reversal there.)
• In Chino, testing a nuclear device within the city limits is prohibited.
• Ice cream may not be eaten while standing on the sidewalk. (Repealed when Clint Eastwood took the chair – as mayor, I mean)
• If you are selling your house you must warn potential buyers if the house is thought to be haunted.

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COLORADO

• It is illegal to permit ones llama to graze on city property. (I’m so cross I could spit!)
• It is unlawful to lend your vacuum cleaner to your next-door neighbor. (Quite right too, let them wallow in their filth and bring the whole neighborhood image down.)

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CONNECTICUT

• In order for a pickle to officially be considered a pickle, it must bounce.
• Selling a spool of thread without first stating its length is subject to a penalty of up to three months in prison.
• It is unlawful to walk backwards after sunset. (And just plain dumb to do it in daylight.)
• It is illegal to sell milk from skinny cows.
• You may not educate dogs. (Or legislators, it seems!)
• It is illegal for a man to kiss his wife on Sunday.

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DELAWARE

• No person shall pretend to sleep on a bench on the boardwalk. (But actually sleeping is okay?)
• One may not whisper in church. (But if we talk loudly won’t it disrupt the Service?)

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FLORIDA

• Doors of all public buildings must open outwards. (Pushist legislation if ever I saw it.)
• It is illegal for female hot dog stand attendants to wear G-strings. 
• A special law prohibits unmarried women from parachuting on Sunday or she shall risk arrest, fine, and/or jailing.
• In West Palm Beach it is a crime to hang a carpet in public.
• Having sexual relations with a porcupine is illegal. (And bloody dangerous I would imagine!)
• You may not kiss your wife’s breasts. (But someone else’s wife is okay?)

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GEORGIA

• It is a crime to sell your child off to a circus. 
• The term “sadomasochistic abuse” is defined so broadly, that it could possibly be applied to a person handcuffing another in a clown suit.
• It is illegal to use profanity in front of a dead body which lies in a funeral home or in a coroners office. (FFS, oops!)
• No one may carry an ice cream cone in their back pocket if it is Sunday. (Don’t they mean “a Sundae”?)
• One is not permitted to noodle a fish. (I don’t know what this means but it sounds a bit pervy.)
• Donkeys may not be kept in bathtubs. (There it is again, what’s going on?)
• All citizens must own a rake. (Leaf us alone!)

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HAWAII

• All residents may be fined as a result of not owning a boat. (Canoe believe this one?)
• In Maui County building an atomic bomb is subject to a fine.
• Coins are not allowed to be placed in one’s ears. (They’ll have to make change here.)

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IDAHO

• It is illegal for a man to give his sweetheart a box of candy weighing less than fifty pounds.
• You may not fish on a camel’s back. (I take the hump at that rule.)
• Cannibalism is prohibited unless under life threatening situations. 
• Residents may not fish from a giraffe’s back. (They’ve got some neck on them!)
• It is a crime for anyone who is not blind to use a white cane.
• A person may not be seen in public without a smile on their face. (Another good reason for reading the fasab blog!)

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ILLINOIS

• You may be arrested for vagrancy if you do not have at least one dollar bill on your person. (The buck stops here.)
• The English language is not to be spoken. (That’s becoming more and more true of a lot of states in the US)
• In Minooka it is illegal to “suffer any bitch or slut”. 
• One may not pee in his neighbor’s mouth. (Just how much of this was going on that they thought they needed a law against it? Or is someone just taking the piss??)
• Law forbids eating in a place that is on fire. (The hell with that.)
• In Joliet the word “Joliet” must be pronounced properly, with the accent on the first syllable.
• It is illegal to give a dog whiskey. (What a waste, I wouldn’t dream of it.)
• In the Pullman area, it is illegal to drink beer out of a bucket while sitting on the curb. (There goes a good night out!)
• It is against the law to sell a smelly mattress. 
• Humming on public streets is prohibited on Sundays. (I guess I’ll have to take a bath Saturdays in Illinois.)
• Wheelbarrows with For-Sale signs may not be chained to trees.

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INDIANA

• Hotel sheets must be exactly 99 inches long and 81 inches wide. (Even for single beds?)
• Stupefying fish is against the law.
• The value of Pi is 3. (No it isn’t.)
• It is illegal for a man to be sexually aroused in public. (That a hard one – to enforce I mean!)
• Baths may not be taken between the months of October and March. (Definitely have to remember to stay out of Illinois then.)
• Possessing a weapon of mass destruction is against the law.
• It is against the law to pass a horse on the street. (Even if it is coming from the other direction?)

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IOWA

• A man with a moustache may never kiss a woman in public.
• It is illegal to catch more than 48 frogs in one day.
• One-armed piano players must perform for free.
• Within the city limits of Ottumwa, a man may not wink at any woman he does not know.

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KANSAS

• Pedestrians crossing the highways at night must wear tail lights. (How illuminating.)
• It is against the law to modify the weather without a permit.
• No one may catch fish with his bare hands. 
• The state game rule prohibits the use of mules to hunt ducks.
• If two trains meet on the same track, neither shall proceed until the other has passed. (That law will get us nowhere.)
• No one may sing the alphabet on the streets at night. (What’s the penalty for lettering?)

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KENTUCKY

• One may not dye a duckling blue and offer it for sale unless more than six are for sale at once.
• One may not receive anal sex. (No problem.)
• Nudist colonies must make themselves available for inspection by the local sheriff. 
• A woman may not buy a hat without her husband’s permission. (So that’s why they went out of fashion.)

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LOUISIANA

• It is a $500 fine to instruct a pizza delivery man to deliver a pizza to your friend without them knowing.
• It is illegal to rob a bank and then shoot at the bank teller with a water pistol. (Okay, if I ever do that I’ll use a real gun.)
• Biting someone with your natural teeth is “simple assault,” while biting someone with your false teeth is “aggravated assault”. (If you have no teeth can you just give them a big suck?)

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If There Are No Stupid Questions, Then What Kind Of Questions Do Stupid People Ask?

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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The title of today’s post is part of a quote from Scott Adams. The whole thing goes, “If there are no stupid questions, then what kind of questions do stupid people ask? Do they get smart just in time to ask questions?”.

I don’t know whether you could classify all of these questions as stupid or otherwise, there’s probably a mixture of both. Different people will probably have different opinions.

As usual if you have any answers then feel free to enlighten us all.

Enjoy.

 

 

Why are builders afraid to have a 13th floor but book publishers aren’t afraid to have a Chapter 11?

 

How do you handcuff a one-armed man?

 

If the FBI breaks your door down do they have to pay for it?

 

In some books, why do they have blank pages at the very end?

 

Why can’t donuts be square?

 

Why put a towel in the dirty clothes basket if when you get out of the shower you are clean?

 

What does happen to an irresistible force when it hits an immovable object?

 

If there’s a speed of sound and a speed of light is there a speed of smell?

 

Why do overalls have belt loops, since they are held up at the top by the straps?

 

Do people in prison celebrate halloween…. if so how?

 

Do the security guards at airports have to go through airport security when they get to work?

 

Why are all of the Harry Potter spells in Latin if he’s English?

 

What do Greeks say when they don’t understand something? “It’s all ???? to me.”

 

Do all-boy schools have girl’s bathrooms? Conversely, do all-girl schools have boy’s bathrooms?

 

Are children who act in rated ‘R’ movies allowed to see them?

 

How come cats’ butts go up when you pet them?

 

What would happen to the sea’s water level if every boat in the world was taken out of the water at the same time?

 

How come you never see a billboard being put up by the highway?

 

Do the English people eat English muffins, or are they just called muffins?

 

How much deeper would the ocean be if sponges didn’t grow in it?

 

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