Did You Know? The Fact File Reveals More Random Facts.

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”


Fascinating facts never seem to come to an end, thank goodness.

Here is the latest selection from the fasab files. Always random, but I hope always interesting, there has to be at least one thing in here that you didn’t know.

Enjoy finding out.



The Lion King is the top grossing Disney movie of all-time

with domestic gross intake of $312 million.

Lion King



The winter and summer seasons on Uranus

last the equivalent of 21 Earth years.




‘Cow’ is a Japanese brand of shaving foam.

Cow-Soap Shaving Cream



The Nobel prizes (in Physics, Chemistry, Physiology or Medicine,

Literature, and Peace) were first awarded in 1901.




The idea of Christmas cards was invented

by Englishman Henry Cole in 1843.

xmas card



Before its name was changed, the ‘African’ Penguin

used be called the ‘Jackass’ Penguin

because of its donkey-like braying call.

penguin 1



The largest diamond that was ever found was 3106 carats.




More than $1 billion is spent each year on neck ties in the United States.




Ballroom dancing is a course at

Brigham Young University in Utah.




New York’s famous Central Park has 125 drinking fountains.

drinking fountain



Before soccer referees started using whistles in 1878,

they used to rely on waving a handkerchief.

referee handkerchief



Jackrabbits (or Hares) can reach a speed of fifty miles per hour

and can leap as far as twenty feet.



Cheesecake was invented in Ancient Greece

and served to athletes at the very first Olympic Games.




As a rule, European carousels rotate clockwise,

while American merry-go-rounds spin counterclockwise.

carousel merrygoround



In a study conducted regarding toilet paper usage,

Americans are said to use the most toilet paper per trip to the bathroom,

which was seven sheets of toilet paper per trip.

toilet paper



The trunk of an elephant can hold up to two gallons of water.




In the movie “Babe”, the piglet was played by

over 30 different piglets as they outgrew the part so quickly

during the production of the film.




There are more Barbie dolls in Italy

than there are Canadians in Canada.




Bird droppings are the chief export of Nauru,

an island nation in the Western Pacific.




Despite the horrific display, nearly two-thirds of those

aboard the LZ 129 Hindenburg survived its fiery crash in 1937.





Welcome To A Bumper Seasonal Edition Of Puns For The Holidays

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”


This week I have a bumper seasonal selection of word plays or puns that are all about or related to the Christmas Holiday Season. Some of them will sleigh you!

They aren’t any better or worse than normal, just themed.

And please don’t say they themed better last week!!!


Doing puns is my stocking trade at this time of year…


Why was Santa’s little helper depressed?

Because he had low elf esteem.

low elf esteem

What would you get if you ate the Christmas decorations?



What did the salt say to the pepper at Christmas?

Season’s Greetings.

santa salt pepper shakers

What do monkeys sing at Christmas time?

“Jungle bells, jungle bells, jungle all the way.”

jungle bells

Why did they ask the turkey to join the band?

Because he had the drum sticks.

turkey drumsticks

What did the bald man say when he got a comb for Christmas?

Thanks, I’ll never part with it!

bald man comb over

A man walks into a diner desiring breakfast.

The waitress seats him and he asks what the specials are.

She tells him the Christmas special is Eggs Benedict.

He orders the special.

A little later, the waitress comes out with the Eggs Benedict, served on hubcaps.

Surprised, he asks why the hubcaps instead of regular plates?

Her response?

“There’s no plates like chrome for the Hollandaise.”

Dave's diner

If athletes get athletes foot, what do astronauts get?

Missle toe!

Missle-Toe cartoon!

What is Santa’s primary language?

North Polish.

polish santa claus

Is Christmas the one day of the year we can all say our children are truly gifted!

Cartoon kids Christmas gifts

What do you get when you cross a Christmas tree with an iPad?

A pineapple.

cartoon pineapple

Why does Santa like to go down chimneys?

Because it soots him!

sooty Santa

Won’t all that soot make him sick? No. He’s had his flue shot.

cartoon doctor

What famous playwright was intimidated by Christmas?

Noel Coward

Noel Coward cartoon

How do sheep in Spain say Merry Christmas?

Fleece Navidad!

fleece navidad

“Wouldn’t just gold and frankincense do?” the third wise man demurred.


Why do you have to make sure the fire is out for Santa Claus coming down the chimney?

Coz if you didn’t you’d end up with a Crisp Cringle?

santa fire in chimney cartoon

What is a computer nerd’s favorite hymn?

Oh, .com all ye faithful!


Why wasn’t the turkey hungry at Christmas time?

Because he was stuffed.


Once there was a Tsar in Russia whose name was Rudolph the Great.

One day as he was standing in his house with his wife he looked out the window and saw something happening.

He says to his wife, “Look honey. It’s raining.” 

She, being the obstinate type, responded, ”I don’t think so, dear. I think it’s snowing.” 

But Rudolph knew better. So he says to his wife, ”Let’s step outside and we’ll find out.” 

Lo and behold, they step outside and discover it was in fact rain.

So Rudolph turns to his wife and says, ”I knew it was raining. Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear!”

Russian Tsar

If you don’t believe in Xmas parties do you still remain eggnogstic?


When the innkeeper’s assistant told Joseph there was no room at the Inn, he said “I’d like to see the manger.”

Joseph at the Inn

I was fed up by the time I got to my last present so I wrapped it up.

wrapping present

Are people who are afraid of Santa Claus-trophobic?


Oh, like I hadn’t heard that old chestnut before.

roasting chestnuts

“Why don’t we ever hear about ‘Olive,’ the 10th reindeer?” asked Bert.

“What 10th Reindeer?” asked Scott.

“You know. Olive, the other reindeer, used to laugh and call him names.”


Scrooge loves all the male reindeer, because every buck is dear to him.

mister scrooge magoo

What do you call Santa’s helpers?

Subordinate Clauses.


Just before Christmas, an honest politician, a generous lawyer and Santa Claus were riding in the elevator of a very posh hotel.

Just before the doors opened they all noticed a $20 bill lying on the floor.

Which one picked it up?

Santa of course, because the other two don’t exist!


Then there was the golfer who played on Christmas and hit a birdie. It was a partridge on a par 3.


The garden center got all spruced up to sell Christmas trees.

Christmas trees

This is not fir I can’t think of any more.


What is there left to say except have a Happy Holly Day.

Holly crown with red bow