Failure Is The Path Of Least Persistence.

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”


If failure is path of least persistence, you can’t accuse me of failing to stick up for puns.

This series has already been going a lot longer than I ever imagined.

Will it ever end?

Eventually I suppose.

But not this week.

So enjoy or endure some more!




It’s your attitude and not your aptitude

that determines your altitude.

attitude and not your aptitude



Last night I had a dream that a silicon chip and

a hard drive conditionally offered to bring my dinner over.

If memory serves me.

silicon chip



It’s been decided that there will be a

new gay wing of the Government.

They’re starting with the Homo Office.

gay cartoon



Who is the worst chicken killer in Shakespeare?

Macbeth. He did murder most foul.




L’Oreal camouflage paint.

Because you’re war fit.

L'Oreal because you're worth it



My wife gave me a leaflet about

anger management last week…

I lost it.

anger management leaflet



People hang on my every word.

Probably why I lost my job at the Samaritans.




Two old ladies knocked on my door,

selling the bible and brown bread,

they were the Hovis witnesses!

Hovis witnesses



I’ve got an idea for a new interactive reality TV show.

It’s called ‘Bone Idol’.

I can’t be bothered to send it in though.

Bone Idol



At the recent winter Olympics, as the rest of the

bobsleigh team prepared for their first run,

the brake man suddenly fell to the floor clutching his leg.

“Go on without me,” he cried.

“I’ll only slow you down.”




Drilling for oil is boring.




I used to run a dating agency for chickens.

But I was struggling to make hens meet.




Did you hear about the Frenchman

who could only count to seven?

He had a huit allergy.

cartoon frenchman



Cool, although I just barley got it…a little corny….

I can’t help it, they just keep cropping up….




A bulb walks into an airport without any bags

wearing nothing but a shirt, sandals, and a hat.

The check in girl looks at him and says,

“Travelling light?”

The bulb says “Yes, I am.”

light bulb



They Say If You Don’t Know Something You Should Ask – Well……

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

Some more questions about those mysteries of life that most of us just seem to accept. It’s a good job that not everyone is so mild mannered.



Why do they call it the ‘Department of Interior’ when they are in charge of everything outdoors?

US Dept Of The Interior Seal.

Why does Jello have a smell when you add the powder in the water, but when it ‘gels’ the smell is gone?


Why are dogs noses always wet?

dog nose.

If a bee is allergic to pollen would it get the hives?


Why do people say ‘heads up’ when what you should really do is duck?


Why is it okay for dudes to slap other dudes’ asses in football, but not in any other situation?


If one man says, ‘it was an uphill battle’, and another says, ‘it went downhill from there’, how could they both be having troubles?

uphill battle  -  all downhill from here
uphill battle – all downhill from here


Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?


If you get cheated by the Better Business Bureau, who do you complain to?

Better Business Bureau logo.

If you blew a bubble in space would it pop?


How come all of the planets are spherical?

square planet.

How did the first women ever to shave their legs know that the skin wouldn’t just peel right off?

first women to shave their legs.

When a pregnant lady has twins, are there one or two umbilical cords?


Why doesn’t Winnie the Pooh ever get stung by the bees he messes with?

Winnie the Pooh.

Why do they put holes in crackers?


Can you still say ‘Put it where the sun don’t shine’ on a nude beach?

nudist beach.

What do people in China call their good plates?


How come toy hippos are always blue, or purple, when real hippos are brown?

purple hippo.

If an escalator breaks down, does it become stairs?

broken escalator.

Why did they call him Donkey Kong if he is not a donkey?

donkey kong



Another Twenty Questions For Tuesday

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”


You may discover the true meaning of life in today’s post (naw, okay, you probably won’t). Nevertheless here is a selection of questions that needed asking but that no one ever asks – until now, that is.




Why do people say ‘the sky is the limit’ when there are footprints on the moon?


If a lawyer says to the judge “I’m Lying”, is he telling the truth?


Why do we call it ‘after dark’ when it’s really ‘after light’?


Why isn’t the number 11 pronounced ‘onety-one’?


What if the Hokey Pokey REALLY IS what it’s all about?


Why is there only 12 hours on a clock?


If you have sex with a prostitute against her will, is it considered rape or shoplifting?


How long is a piece of string?


Can animals commit suicide?


Why does the Easter bunny carry eggs? Rabbits don’t lay eggs!


Did London Bridge ever fall down?


Is it possible to be allergic to water?


Why do super-heroes wear their underwear on the outside of their clothes?


Why are women and men’s shoe sizes different?


What was the best thing BEFORE sliced bread?


How do you make seven even?


Why do they call it a ‘Television Set’ when there’s only one?


How fast do you need to cook for it to be considered ‘Fast Food’?


Where does the ‘o’ come from when we abbreviate the word ‘number’?


Why do they imply the ‘birds and the bees’ get up to something together?