Did You Know? Another Rummage Through The Fasab Fact Files

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Hello again and welcome to another rummage through the fasab fact files.

As random as ever, this selection covers many centuries and many countries so you should find something of interest.

Enjoy.

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Did You Know 4

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1 in 5 of the world’s doctors are Russian.

RAMA

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The Nullarbor Plain of Australia covers

100,000 square miles (160,900 km) without a tree.

Nullarbor_plain

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In 1933, Mickey Mouse, an animated cartoon character,

received 800,000 fan letters.

Mickey Mouse

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Nerve impulses to and from the brain

travel as fast as 170 miles (274 km) per hour.

neurons-120208

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Ancient Egyptians shaved off their eyebrows

to mourn the deaths of their cats.

egypt

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Canadian researchers have found that

Einstein’s brain was 15% wider than normal.

brain_jar

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Isaac Asimov is the only author

to have a book in every Dewey-decimal category.

IsaacAsimov

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The shortest British monarch was Charles I,

who was 4 feet 9 inches.

King_Charles_I_by_Antoon_van_Dyck

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Sigmund Freud had a morbid fear of ferns.

(Something to do with his mother no doubt!)

sigmund-freud

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Camels chew in a figure 8 pattern.

camel-chewing-cud

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In space, astronauts cannot cry,

because there is no gravity,

so the tears can’t flow.

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There are 1,792 steps in the Eiffel Tower

 Eiffel Tower

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A silicon chip a quarter inch square

has the capacity of the original 1949 ENIAC computer,

which occupied a city block.

Silicon chip

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About a third of all Americans flush the toilet

while they’re still sitting on it.

 woman-sitting-on-toilet

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Actor Tommy Lee Jones and vice president Al Gore

were freshman roommates at Harvard.

 Tommy Lee Jones and Al Gore college shot

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In eighteenth century England,

women’s wigs were sometimes 4 feet high.

These remarkable headdresses were dusted with flour

and decorated with stuffed birds, replicas of gardens,

plates of fruit, or even model ships.

 18th Century hairstyles

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In 1976 a Los Angeles secretary named Jannene Swift

officially married a 50 pound rock.

The ceremony was witnessed by more than 20 people.

Woman marries rock

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In Tokyo, they sell toupees for dogs.

dogs-with-toupees

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John has a long moustache was the coded signal

used by the French Resistance in WWII

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Sorry Al, Nobody’s Interested

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Al Gore

While hardly anyone in the media was paying attention a study was recently released by the National Opinion Research Center at the University of Chicago – a large, long-standing and respected non-profit organization.

The results are based on surveys which began in 1993, back in the boom times, and “are the first and only surveys that put long-term attitudes toward environmental issues in general and global climate change in particular in an international perspective,” according to NORC’s Tom W Smith.

The seventeen years of continuous surveys covering countries around the world show that people not only do not care about climate change today – which is understandable in the current world economic and financial difficulties – but it also shows they did not care about climate change even back when times were good.

The NORC spokespersons add that decades of climate alarmism have had basically no effect on people’s attitude around the world!

 Al Gore ice gone lie

The latest surveys were completed in 2010. Similar surveys have been conducted since 1993, and little change has been noted on people’s concern for climate change.

The economy ranked highest in concern in 15 countries, followed by health care in eight, education in six, poverty in two, and terrorism and crime in one country each.

Immigration and the environment did not make the top of the list in any country over the 17-year period; in the United States, the economy ranked as the highest concern, while concern for the environment ranked sixth.

In terms of national averages the surveys showed that the order of concern was the economy (25 percent); health care (22.2); education (15.6); poverty (11.6); crime (8.6); environment (4.7); immigration (4.1); and terrorism (2.6).

 gore2_Brown Cartoon

Essentially, the environment joins terrorism and immigration on the list of subjects nobody has ever been able to really give a toss about, though the compiling professors did note that in Turkey they do consider terrorism serious: the Turks rate it number one, in fact, though nobody else does.

“Terrorism’s low ranking was notable in light of the widespread attention the issue has received since 2001,” comment the NORC analysts, perhaps sounding a knell of doom for Al Gore and his accomplices who believe they can gain support for their agenda through incessant publicity.

gore4

Those interested can view the report at

http://www.norc.org/PDFs/Public_Attitudes_Climate_Change.pdf

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Stupidity Always Finds A Way – Out Of A Politician’s Mouth!

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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I have a healthy contempt for politicians and bureaucrats as you’ve probably gathered if you’ve read much of this blog. And it’s well justified.

I could relate some stories to emphasize my point, but actually I don’t have to. The politicians themselves have proved it themselves. Here’s a short selection to show you what I mean.

Enjoy

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Hillary Clinton:

“We are the president.”

Hillary Clinton

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Al Gore, former U.S. Vice President:

“I invented the internet.”

Al Gore

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Bob Dole, former Republican United States Senate Majority Leader from Kansas:

“Life is very important to Americans.”

Bob Dole

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President Richard Nixon at French President Charles de Gaulle’s funeral:

“This is a great day for France!”

Richard Nixon

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Barack Obama at a campaign event in Beaverton, Oregon:

“I’ve now been in 57 states – I think one left to go.”

Barack Obama

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Alaska Gov. Walter Hickel once justified a plan to kill hundreds of wolves by saying:

“You just can’t let nature run wild.”

Walter Hickel

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Strom Thurmond, U.S. senator from South Carolina:

“The U.S. Senate is a special place. I love all of you and especially your wives.”

Strom Thurmond

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Vice President Dan Quayle:

“Desert Storm was a stirring victory for the forces of aggression and lawlessness.”

Dan Quayle

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California Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger:

“I don’t understand how they can call me anti-Latino when I’ve made four movies in Mexico.”

Arnold Schwarzenegger

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Frances “Sissy” Farenthold, Texas state representative:

“I am working for the time when unqualified blacks, browns and women join the unqualified men in running the government.”

Frances Farenthold

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Miriam “Ma” Ferguson, Texas governor:

“If the King’s English was good enough for Jesus, it’s good enough for me.”

Miriam Ferguson

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Tom Daschle, U.S. senator from South Dakota, denouncing spending on space-based missile defense:

“This isn’t rocket science here.”

Tom Daschle

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Larry Koon, South Carolina state representative:

“Women are best suited for secretarial work, decorating cakes and counter sales, like selling lingerie.”

Larry Koon, South Carolina state representative
Mr Koon’s face has been removed from this post for his own safety in light of these remarks

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Jay Dickey Jr., U.S. representative from Arkansas:

“I think incest can be handled as a family matter within the family.”

Jay Dickey Jr

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Jerry Brown, former Governor of California:

“We’re going to move left and right at the same time.”

Jerry Brown, former Governor of California

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Excerpt from Bill Clinton’s grand jury testimony:

“It depends on what the meaning of the word ‘is’ is” –

president bubba clinton

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Don’t Take My Word For It, Let These Guys Tell You Themselves

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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The elections are over, much to the relief of many of us, but unfortunately the politicians are still there. I have frequently criticized these idiots for making a monumental mess of things and for squandering billions of dollars on the most insanely stupid debacles and catastrophes. And I will probably do so again. 

However, it is always a good idea or policy to be able to back up what you say with some facts, so rather than run to my own defense which is usually what happens, this time I am going to let some of the politicians prove beyond any and all reasonable doubt that my opinion of them is well justified.

So here we have a selection of quotations from some fairly famous politicians in which they condemn themselves to the dustbin of stupidity.

Enjoy.  

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Bill Clinton, 42nd President of the United States:

“Politics gives guys so much power that they tend to behave badly around women. And I hope I never get into that.”

Bill Clinton 

This from a congressional candidate in Texas:

“That scoundrel deserves to be kicked to death by a jackass, and I’m just the one to do it.”

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Arnold Schwarzenegger, Governor of California Governor talking about his views on the economy:

“The public doesn’t care about figures.”

Arnold Schwarzenegger speaking as governor 

Jacques le Blanc, French ambassador on nuclear weapons:

“I do not like this word ‘bomb.’ It is not a bomb. It is a device that is exploding.”

Jacques LeBlanc 

Aggie Pate, at a non-denominational mayor’s breakfast, Fort Worth, Texas:

“I didn’t know Onward Christian Soldiers was a Christian song.”

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California Senator Barbara Boxer:

“Those who survived the San Francisco earthquake said, ‘Thank God, I’m still alive.’ But, of course, those who died, their lives will never be the same again.”

Barbara Boxer 

Ex-police chief and mayor of Philadelphia, Frank Rizzo:

“The streets are safe in Philadelphia. It’s only the people who make them unsafe.”

Frank Rizzo 

Congressman Everett Dirksen:

“A billion here, a billion there, sooner or later it adds up to real money.”

Everett Dirksen 

Former U.S. President, Richard Nixon:

“Solutions are not the answer.”

Richard M Nixon 

H. Ross Perot, major Texas businessman and former presidential candidate:

“This planet is our home. If we destroy the planet, we’ve destroyed our home, so it is fundamentally important.”

 Ross Perot making a point

Arizona Governor Wesley Bolin:

“We’d like to avoid problems, because when we have problems, we can have troubles.”

Wesley Bolin 

George Wallace 1968 presidential campaign:

“I’ve read about foreign policy and studied, I now know the number of continents.”

George Wallace 

Dwight Eisenhower, 34th President of the United States:

“The world is more like it is now then it ever has before.”

Dwight D Eisenhower 

Fred Heineman, former Republican representative from North Carolina:

“When I see someone who is making anywhere from $300,000 to $750,000 a year, that’s middle class.”

Fred Heineman 

Canadian Prime Minister Jean Chrétien:

“A proof is a proof. What kind of proof? It’s a proof. A proof is proof. And when you have a good proof, it’s because it is proven.”

Canadian Prime Minister Jean Chrétien

Imelda Marcos, former First Lady and a political figure in the Philippines:

“I get so tired listening to one million dollars here, one million dollars there, it’s so petty.”

Imelda Marcos 

Bob Dole, Republican presidential candidate:

“The internet is a great way to get on the net.”

Bob Dole 

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Al Gore, former U.S. vice president:

“We are ready for an unforeseen event that may or may not occur.”

Al Gore 

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Former California Governor Gray Davis, during the recall campaign:

“My vision is to make the most diverse state on earth, and we have people from every planet on the earth in this state. We have the sons and daughters of every, of people from every planet, of every country on earth.”

Former California Governor Gray Davis 

Charles De Gaulle, former French President:

“China is a big country, inhabited by many Chinese.”

Charles De Gaulle 

President Clinton, denying that he had sexually harassed Kathleen Willey:

“I would never approach a small-breasted woman.”

Monica Lewinsky 

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The Brain-To-Mouth-Bypass Mishaps Of Joe Public And Friends – Yes, Another Quiz Show Monday Folks!

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

Yesterday you were in the hot seat trying to answer some questions. But I’m sure you did better than this lot and your questions were much trickier than these.

Feel superior and enjoy the brain-to-mouth-bypass mishaps of Joe Public and friends.

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Q: In literature, Arthur C. Clarke’s “2010: Odyssey Two” was primarily set in what century?

A: Third

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Q: What is 2 times 5?   

A: 7     

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Q: What name is given to the field of medicine that concerns the health of women?        

A: Womenology

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Q: The law of what organization states that its members are “brave, clean and reverent”

A: Alcoholics Anonymous   (Answer: Boy Scouts)          

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Q: The name of which Caribbean island literally means “rich port” in Spanish?      

A: Port Richmond

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Q: What is half of 1,000

A: 100  

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Q: According to Hallmark, what type of gift should be given on the 50th wedding anniversary?    

A: Greeting card

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Q: What animal builds dams and lodges?          

A: Sheep

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Q: Who is the only Marx brother that remained silent throughout all their films?    

A: Karl 

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Q: What Tennessee congressman fought at the Battle of the Alamo?      

A: Al Gore

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Q: What ‘S’ is one of the seven deadly sins in Christianity?        

A: Science

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Q: What part of the human body is closest to the floor when we are walking?      

A: Head           

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Q: What 20 year old Russian tennis star released a fitness video called “Basic Elements?”          

A: Arnold Schwarzenegger

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Q: In 1973, President Nixon issued a statement saying “I am not a…” what?        

A: Canadian

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Q: What is the largest planet visible from Earth?

A: The moon    

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Q: On TV’s “Cheers,” which actress played bar manager Rebecca Howe?

A: Ted Dansen 

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Q: The Governor’s mansion in the state of Georgia is located in which city?        

A: Alabama

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Q: What does the “U” stand for in the name of the dissolved country U.S.S.R.?  

A: Russia

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Q: What is the capital of New Jersey?   

A: Delaware

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Q: What computer company’s name is abbreviated IBM?

A: Apple

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It’s More Moronic Madness, Yes, It’s Quiz Show Monday!

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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So how many idiots got elected last week? Not all of them I hope, but I bet there are at least a few intellectually challenged newbees in the corridors of power in Washington. 

On the lighter side, some of those who didn’t make it in politics made it on to television and appeared in quiz shows.

The results are not that much different to some of the dumb things said in Congress (oh, oh, I feel another post forming in my head) so here is a selection to get the week started with a smile.

Enjoy!  

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Q: In craps, what are the numbers you will need to roll an ‘Easy 10’?        

A: What are 9 and 1?    

craps dice

. 111111

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Q: Paul III roared at him, “I have waited 30 years for your services. Now, I’m pope. Can’t I satisfy my desire?”        

A: Who is Lady Godiva?

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Q: If a Japanese “isha” (doctor) asks you to stick out your “shita”, he means this.           

A: What is your behind?

proctologist cartoon

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Q: To get to Wallace, Idaho from Boston, get on I-90 West, and the first one of these you ‘hit’, you’re there.        

A: What is a buffalo?

Buffalo

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Q: 2 of the 3 countries classified as extending across two continents     

A: What are Africa and Europe? 

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Q: The original one of these on Massachusetts’ Little Brewster Island was built in 1716; automation didn’t come until 1998.           

A: What is Kebert Xela?

Kebert Xela 

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Q: [The language that this statement, meaning “I love you guys”, is in:] Yr Wyf I’n Dy Garu Di      

A: What is Klingon?

A:  What is Welsh?       

klingon

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Q: He is the only sitting Vice President since Martin Van Buren to be elected President   

A: Who is Al Gore?

Al Gore cartoon

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Q: This nursery rhyme was based on actual events at a 1900 schoolhouse.         

A: What is ‘There once was a man from Nantucket?’       

There once was a man from Nantucket

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Q: In 2002, an elaborate dinner party was held at No. 10 to celebrate this many years’ reign by Elizabeth II           

A: Who is Tony Blair?   

Tony Blair cartoon

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Q: The Timon puppet in “The Lion King” was inspired by Bunraku, the traditional puppet theatre of this country     

A: What is Africa?        

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Q: Of the 5 permanent members of the UN Security Council, the one that is smallest in size         

A: What is my apartment?         

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Q: George Bernard Shaw called this condition “the greatest of evils and the worst of crimes.”       

A: What is marriage?

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Q: Of Pastism, Presentism or Futurism, the literary movement that began around 1909    

A: What is Modernism?

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Q: According to the old saying, “I scream, you scream, we all scream for…” what?          

A: Jim Beam

Jim Beam

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Q: Franklin D. Roosevelt is found on the head side of what American coin?        

A: $50 Bill

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Q: “If I can make it there, I can make it anywhere.” What city does that describe?

A: Phoenix

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Q: What was the magical item that brought Frosty the Snowman to life? 

A: Corncob pipe

corn cob pipes 

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Q: What vehicle is used in the Tour de France race?       

A: SUVs

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Q: What eye ailment is the more common name for “myopia?”    

A: You think you’re right

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 A myopic video

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The Answers That Raise More Questions Than The Questions They Answer, In Other Words It’s Quiz Show Monday!

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Yes, it’s another Quiz Show Monday and time to examine the workings of the inner minds that really don’t work so well.

Enjoy.

(Now where did I put that flask???)

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Q: Name a cable TV channel the whole family can watch together

A: UPN (He meant “USPN”)

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Q: Name something men would carry inside bras, if they started wearing them

A: Flask

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Q: Name something you see at every college football game

A: Alcohol

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Q: Name a food people put ketchup on

A: Bacon

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Q: Name something you do while you sunbathe

A: Lay in the sun

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Q: Name a place where you might see another person take off all their clothes

A: The mall

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Q: Name a specific place where you’d hate to be during a major power failure

A: In a car

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Q: Name a famous “Arnold”

A: Arnold & Willis

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Q: The country you think has the most exciting men? (Asked to 100 women)

A: Paris

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Q: Name a month that’s also a person’s name

A: January

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Q: Name something with a hole in the middle

A: Hole punch

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Q: Name something people hold still for

A: When they have to go to the bathroom

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Q: How long an extramarital affair lasts

A: 3 days

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Q: Name a fact about Al Gore

A: He’s a Republican

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Q: The section of the newspaper in which you’d be shocked to find your name

A: Weddings
A: Lost and Found

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Q: The fastest selling drug

A: Marijuana
A: Vicodin

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Q: The person who is most likely to be on George W. Bush’s dartboard

A: Jesse Jackson
A: Larry King

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Q: Name something that comes in pairs

A: Bananas

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Q: Name something little kids don’t like to wear

A: Shirts

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Q: Name a vegetable that grows in the ground

A: Cabbage

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