Ebay Accounts Are Forbidden.

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Sadly WordPress doesn’t let you bid on these posts either. I wonder why not?

Still, never mind, we have another Pun Day to look forward too now.

So….

Enjoy or endure!!

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WANTED:

Assistant required to fill

hourglasses with sand.

No timewasters.

 

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When bakers have a fight

They go at it all Buns Glazing.

 

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My friend is really interested in magnets.

Personally, I can’t see the attraction.

 

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Some bloke just barged into my caravan

accusing me of being the world’s worst psychic.

I don’t know what he was thinking.

 

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I entered a cartoonist competition today,

there were five of us in it,

we drew..

 

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How do trespassers get in your house?

Intruder window.

 

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This morning a beautiful blonde

came up to me in the street

and wrote her phone number on my hand

in bright yellow felt tip pen…

… It was the highlight of my day !

 

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I gave my son a faceless coin.

He couldn’t make head nor tails of it.

 

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If I see one more person misuse an apostrophe

I think Ill go completely nut’s !

 

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I am permanently hooked up to a device

which gives me an electric shock

if I say something negative.

It’s not ideal, but I can’t complain

 

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I’ve noticed that chess players

always close the door behind them

Do you think they don’t like draughts?

 

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Somebody closed the lid on my piano.

Now i can’t open it because the keys are inside.

 

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My friend has just directed his

own under-budget documentary,

“Living with the World’s Smallest Bath”.

I thought I’d give him a little plug.

 

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You can tell the sex of an ant

by dropping it into a jug of water.

If it sinks: girl ant

If it floats: boy ant

 

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The number of people who shout

“Boo!”

to their friends has risen by 85%.

That’s a frightening statistic.

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