Ugh, Communism Just Has No Class.

 “Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”


Communism may have no class but clever word play certainly does.

That’s our cue for another Pun Day.

Enjoy or endure!




I’m against picketing,

but I don’t know how to show it.

against picketing



I saw a man walking along the street

with a t-shirt that said ‘Free Hugs’.

I don’t know who ‘Hugs’ is,

but I’m sure they should release him.

t-shirt 'Free Hugs'



I went for a job interview at 

my local sandwich shop today.

As an aptitude test, the shop owner

asked me to make a beef sandwich

using only a spoon.

Unfortunately I didn’t get the job

– I couldn’t cut the mustard.

sandwich shop




A committee is a group of people

who keep minutes and lose hours.

A committee



I was given the sack at work last month.

I suppose you have to expect that

when you play Santa Clause.

play Santa Clause



I can’t speak for anyone else,

but I think I’m a terrible ventriloquist.

terrible ventriloquist



My girlfriend talked me into putting

table salt into my bath today.

I think I’ve been brine washed.

table salt into my bath



I saw a strange white bear at the zoo today.

It was mating with a female bear then it

suddenly it tried mating with a male bear.

I think it’s Bi Polar.

white bear at the zoo



Never employ someone who’s obsessed with graphs.

They’ll always be plotting behind your back.




I got a real telling off yesterday

when we were visiting grandma.

She has a very hairy upper lip

and when we were leaving, she asked

me why I wouldn’t kiss her good bye.

Apparently my answer, “Sorry, must-dash,”

wasn’t the best choice of words.

hairy upper lip



How does an angry Muslim close a door?

Islams it.

door slam



I’ve just seen a sign in the post office that said

“Stamps sold by the book”.

It’s good to know that someone follows the rules.

book of stamps



I decided to open an

exclusive hotel and casino

for people who have epilepsy.

It’s called Seizure’s Palace.

Seizure's Palace



I went to the pet shop to buy some breeding birds.

The cashier said, “Have you got a store card?”

I said, “No but I did get a budgie excited once.”

pet shop



My friend has just rung to say

he’s bought a bubble car.

He’s going to pop round in it later.

bubble car




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