I Can’t Believe Pretzels Are Knot Bread.

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”


Get it?

Pretzels, knot bread?

Never mind. Time to unravel a few more word plays.

It’s Pun Day.

Enjoy or endure!




Here’s a good one for you,

Good one.

good one



I went to the museum to feed the animals

But they were all stuffed

stuffed animals in museum



Those disposable cameras

are a complete con.

Now I have absolutely no record

of a perfectly lovely holiday.


disposable cameras.


My girlfriend said she was going to

leave me because of my obsession with

pointing out inanimate objects…

So I showed her the door.

man pointing



My son has been asked

to sign for his local team.

To be honest,

I never knew they were deaf.

boy with foorball



Cadbury’s have brought out

a new box of chocolates

for inconsiderate people.

They’re self centered.




I run a business selling tiny models

of Buddha and Mohammed.

Sales aren’t the best but

I’m making small prophets.

tiny model of buddha



Everyone’s blaming me for the

animal noises on the video conference at work.

Seems I’ve been made into a Skypegoat.




The English language

is the best in the world.

It just has a certain…

je ne sais quoi.

je ne sais quoi



My family abandoned me,

my ex-girlfriend took everything I own,

and my children hate me

all because of my constant optimism.

Still, it could be worse.




My wife asked me for a

new wardrobe last Christmas,

so I got her one.

Turns out she just wanted clothes

new wardrobe



I’m looking forward

to my dirty weekend.

Wash the car,

clean the garden,

take rubbish out……

dirty weekend



I got water trapped in my ears

after having a shower this morning.

It was a near deaf experience.

water trapped in my ears



If you like women

as well as the next man

you’re probably bi-sexual.




What’s the temperature in Motown ?

Three degrees, four tops…





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