I Can’t Believe Pretzels Are Knot Bread.

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

.

Get it?

Pretzels, knot bread?

Never mind. Time to unravel a few more word plays.

It’s Pun Day.

Enjoy or endure!

.

rofl

.

Here’s a good one for you,

Good one.

good one

.

.

I went to the museum to feed the animals

But they were all stuffed

stuffed animals in museum

.

.

Those disposable cameras

are a complete con.

Now I have absolutely no record

of a perfectly lovely holiday.

 

disposable cameras.

.

My girlfriend said she was going to

leave me because of my obsession with

pointing out inanimate objects…

So I showed her the door.

man pointing

.

.

My son has been asked

to sign for his local team.

To be honest,

I never knew they were deaf.

boy with foorball

.

.

Cadbury’s have brought out

a new box of chocolates

for inconsiderate people.

They’re self centered.

Cadbury's

.

.

I run a business selling tiny models

of Buddha and Mohammed.

Sales aren’t the best but

I’m making small prophets.

tiny model of buddha

.

.

Everyone’s blaming me for the

animal noises on the video conference at work.

Seems I’ve been made into a Skypegoat.

skype_logo

.

.

The English language

is the best in the world.

It just has a certain…

je ne sais quoi.

je ne sais quoi

.

.

My family abandoned me,

my ex-girlfriend took everything I own,

and my children hate me

all because of my constant optimism.

Still, it could be worse.

optimism

.

.

My wife asked me for a

new wardrobe last Christmas,

so I got her one.

Turns out she just wanted clothes

new wardrobe

.

.

I’m looking forward

to my dirty weekend.

Wash the car,

clean the garden,

take rubbish out……

dirty weekend

.

.

I got water trapped in my ears

after having a shower this morning.

It was a near deaf experience.

water trapped in my ears

.

.

If you like women

as well as the next man

you’re probably bi-sexual.

Bisexual!

.

.

What’s the temperature in Motown ?

Three degrees, four tops…

.

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