It Takes Guts To Go To Weight Watchers.

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

.

And it takes guts to publish some of these word play jokes.

So strap yourselves in for another wicked selection.

Enjoy or endure!

.

rofl

.

My girlfriend keeps telling me that making

clothes based puns is really not funny.

Corset is!

corset

.

.

My teacher asked the class,

“Can anybody name a sport that starts with a ‘T’?”

I said “Yes, golf.”

golf_tee

.

.

My son asked me where the most

dangerous place on earth is.

I’m stuck between Iraq Kandahar place.

Iraq-Kandahar-Afghanistan signpost

.

.

I was speaking to a man from Syria today and he said,

“In my country, bear fighting is the most popular sport.”

“That’s revolting.” I replied.

“No,” he said. “That’s our second most popular.”

Syrian revolutionaries

.

.

Teacher: “In this box, I have a 10-foot snake.”

Sammy : “You can’t fool me, Teacher…

snakes don’t have feet.”

burmese-python

.

.

A woman screamed, “No means no!” at me today.

I left soon after.

It was the shortest Spanish lesson I’d ever had.

Learn to speak Spanish

.

.

I saved loads of cash on the new over-priced iPhone yesterday.

I didn’t buy one.

iphone

.

.

A note left for a pianist from his wife

“Gone Chopin, have Liszt, Bach in a Minuet.”

pianist

.

.

About to microwave some fruit.

Getting ready for a hot date.

dates

.

.

I got arrested yesterday for stealing hay from a farmer.

I’ve been refused bale.

hay bale

.

.

When my wife told me Scandinavian languages

don’t have the letter ‘R’ I immediately thought…

No way!

Norway sign

.

.

I’ve often wondered why it is called ‘Mooning’

when you’re actually showing ‘Uranus’?

Uranus

.

.

As a musician, I hate the key of E minor.

It gives me the E B G B s

DA-EGBDF

.

.

I heard someone say that nothing rhymes with orange.

No it doesn’t!

annoying orange

.

.

I used to live in a small town in Spain called Macarena.

But I don’t like to make a song and dance about it.

.

.

==========================================

.

5 thoughts on “It Takes Guts To Go To Weight Watchers.

Comments are welcome. If you would like to make one on this post this is the place to do it.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s