Treadmills Get You Nowhere

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Pun day!

Steel yourselves for some more rather bad jokes.

There must be a few out there with masochistic tendencies because you seem to enjoy puns or word play jokes.

Me too.

So let’s get on with today’s selection.

Enjoy!

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I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.

Broken Handle

Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in the craft.

Unsurprisingly it sank, proving once again

that you can’t have your kayak and heat it too.

Two Eskimos in a Kayak Clipart

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I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn’t find any.

Urban-Camouflage

Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married.

The ceremony wasn’t much, but the reception was excellent.

two antennas

Banning the bra was a big flop.

 boobes cartoon

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Is a book on voyeurism a peeping tome?

peeping tome

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Khakis: What you need to start the car in Boston.

boston-alphabet

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A pessimist’s blood type is always b-negative.

A pessimist's blood type is always b-negative

A guy walks into the psychiatrist wearing only shorts made from Bubble wrap.

The psychiatrist says, “Well, I can clearly see you’re nuts.”

Bubble-Wrap

Two wrongs don’t make a right.

But three rights make a left.

3 rights make a left

Thieves broke into the carpet store last night.

Police think it might be rug related.

rug

Corduroy pillows. They’re making headlines.

corduroy-pillows

Why was the dog standing still?

Because it was on paws.

 happy_cartoon_dog

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A woman has identical twins and gives them up for adoption.

One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named “Ahmal.”

The other goes to a family in Spain; they name him “Juan.”

Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his birth mother.

Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wishes she also had a picture of Ahmal.

Her husband responds, “They’re twins for goodness sake! If you’ve seen Juan, you’ve seen Ahmal.”

Juan and Ahmal

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