It’s Another Word Play Day, So Time For Some More Puns

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

.

A few more bad jokes wrapped up as puns. I am slightly amazed, but also pleased, that the puns have been received so well by most readers. So it wasn’t only me!  

Enjoy.

. 

 .

Lightning sometimes shocks people because it just doesn’t know how to conduct itself.

 

.

When the cannibal showed up late to the luncheon, they gave him the cold shoulder.      

 

.

The experienced carpenter really nailed it, but the new guy screwed everything up.

 

.

The one who invented the door knocker got a No-bell prize.       

 .

Greengrocers earn a meager celery, come home beet and just want to read the pepper, take a leek, turnip the covers endive into bed.

 

.

A noun and a verb were dating but they broke up because the noun was too possessive.

 .

I didn’t want to buy leather shoes, but eventually I was suede.

 .

For plumbers, a flush beats a full house.           

 .

A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months. 

 .

I just got my permit to harvest shrimp in the Antarctic. Now I have a licence to Krill.

 .

I don’t think I need a spine. It’s holding me back.           

 .

What did the triangle say to the circle? You’re so pointless.

 .

Old colanders never die, they just can’t take the strain anymore.

 .

I probably have blind spots, but I don’t see them.

 .

After winter, the trees are relieved.

 .

Calves take well to bottle feeding because one nipple is as good as an udder.

 .

The shareholders of a compass manufacturer were concerned that the company wasn’t heading in the right direction.

 .

I’m bad at math, so the equation 2n+2n is 4n to me.

 .

The lights were too bright at the Chinese restaurant so the manager decided to dim sum.

 .

The proctologist reassured the patient that his condition could be rectified.

 .

======================

 .