“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”
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Another Tuesday and another list of questions so important that no one seems to want to ask them – except here of course.
Enjoy.
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Where does the toe-tag go on a dead person if they don’t have toes?
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If you dug a hole through the center of the earth and jumped in, would you stay at the center because of gravity?
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Why is there a disclaimer on the Allstate Auto Insurance commercials that says “Not available in all states”?
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Do they bury people with their braces on?
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How far east can you go before you’re heading west?
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Do dentists go to other dentists or do they just do it themselves?
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If, in a baseball game, the batter hits a ball splitting it right down the center with half the ball flying out of the park and the other half being caught, what is the final ruling?
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Why do people think that swaying their arm back and forth would change the direction of a bowling ball?
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Why is it that everyone driving faster than you is considered an idiot, and everyone driving slower than you is a moron?
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If pro and con are opposites, wouldn’t the opposite of progress be congress?
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Why does grape flavor smell the way it is when actual grapes don’t taste or smell anything like it.
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If girls with large breasts work at Hooters, then do girls with one leg work at IHOP?
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If a kid refuses to sleep during nap time, are they guilty of resisting a rest?
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Is it rude for a deaf person to talk (sign) with their mouth full of food?
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If a transvestite goes missing, would you put their face on a carton of Half and Half?
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When does it stop being partly cloudy and start being partly sunny?
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Are eyebrows considered facial hair?
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If a baby’s leg pops out at 11:59PM but his head doesn’t come out until 12:01, which day was he born on?
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Since bread is square, then why is sandwich meat round?
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Why is the Lone Ranger called ‘Lone’ if he always has his Indian friend Tonto with him?
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Brilliant questions for us to ponder……half and half?
Thanks for the comment. Glad you liked them – well half anyhow 😉 .
Round lunch meat on squarish bread is a no brainer …. so we can eat around the bread first.
hey …. if one is traveling east, the will always be going east as long as they don’t turn around.
Correct!! Unless you fall off the edge…..duh!!!
Dang … I forgot about the edge.
Actually, I can answer the baby one – it’s when the whole kid is out. I know – my birth time is 12:06 am, so I’m part Sagittarius and part Capricorn. (And ALL pain the butt! 😀 )
Oh, and the decision on the baseball one? There’d be two decisions – first, they need to fire the company making baseballs, and second, they need to get rid of all those substitute football refs they hired on the cheap, ’cause only one of those goofballs could make a baseball split!
By the by, connected to your deaf-person signing, if he signs an obscenity, how do you punish him? You’re already making him wash his hands anyway….. 😉
Thanks for your comments and clearing up a few of those issues. The last two baseballs I bought in the US were marked “made in China” – how does that work????
Very, good, fasab!
Thank you very much.
Howdy! Would you mind if I share your blog with my myspace group? There’s a lot of folks that I think would really appreciate your content. Please let me know. Thanks
Please do and tell them to call in for more 🙂
why is it that the number of hotdogs in a package never matches the number of buns in a package?
you’re question about going east reminded me of something that happened years ago. i saw an ad for a store, and i wanted to go there, but i wasn’t sure where it was. i have absolutely no sense of direction, so i called to ask how to get there. a man answered the phone, and i asked where they were located. he said that they were in the lincoln square mall. i asked, ‘is that east or west of university drive?’ he answered, ‘that depends. which direction are you coming from?’ 😆 true story!
Nice story. The true ones are usually the best.
And I never noticed the buns and hotdog thing, but it
is a great question.
Thanks for commenting.