Archive for October, 2013

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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But as a rule of thumb I like puns.

Hope you do too.

Here are some more.

Enjoy!

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rofl

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My Japanese penpal dropped out of school recently.

He’s taken leave of his Senseis.

cartoon Sensei

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I’ve got a new job stacking shelves at a supermarket for big, tall men.

It keeps me on my toes.

high shelves

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I was chatting to someone about cylindrical fasteners earlier,

it was a riveting conversation.

Rivets

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Skiers don’t have drunken arguments,

they just storm off-piste.

off piste

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I used to be the managing director of the world’s largest ladder company.

Until I was asked to step down.

dana-fradon-dejected-man-setting-on-top-rung-of-a-ladder-the-steps

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A friend asked if I wanted to buy his motor boat.

I jumped at the chance and bought both.

I can keep the boat on the moat.

moat or boat

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My friend sells knives for a living and he said if I posted

this on the internet he’d give me a cut.

knife

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What numbskull called it the Police / Fire Department Headquarters

and not Guns and Hoses?

guns_and_hoses

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I went for a job interview with the hacking group Anonymous.

Introduced myself…

And that was the end of the interview

occupy-mask

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Just read in the news, that there’s going to be a beauty contest

where all the models are dressed up in newspaper pages.

It must be a Miss Print.

girl wrapped in newspaper

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The A- eam.

Hey, missed a T.

mr-t

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I went through a lot to be with my girlfriend.

She was standing at the other end of the car park.

Parking-lot-picture

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I wish I’d never joined the S and M club.

They tied me into a long term contract.

man-tied to contract

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A driver waved at me to stop my car and asked if I could change attire.

Why would someone assume that I would keep spare clothes with me!

flat-tyre-cartoon

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Heck is where people go to

who don’t believe in Golly.

what-the-heck

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Something tells me my posture might not be so great,

I don’t know.

I just have a hunch.

439346-Royalty-Free-RF-Clip-Art-Illustration-Of-A-Cartoon-Hunchback

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Two red blood cells met and fell in love.

But alas, it was in vein.

blood-cartoon

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My fruit and vegetable business has gone into liquidation.

Now we sell smoothies.

smoothie

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Man, you get a load of boos when

you turn up to an AA meeting pissed.

AA_Meeting_lolwtmk

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I turned up to a McDonald’s job interview

riding piggyback on a Burger King employee.

“Could I just ask what the hell you’re doing?”

the receptionist asked curtly.

“Well,” I explained patiently, “the woman on the phone told me

I should report to Reception on a rival” 

piggyback

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“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Fact day again on the fasab blog.

Another twenty things you probably don’t know now, but not to worry, you will do soon if you read on.

Enjoy.

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did you know1

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Before Gmail, “G-Mail” was the name of a free

email service offered by Garfield’s website.

gmail-logo-transparent

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In America the bonnets and caps of city fire hydrants

are painted certain colors to alert firefighters

to the amount of water pressure available from that hydrant.

fire hydrant

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It isn’t water itself that conducts electricity,

but the impurities found in it.

short_circuit water and electricity cartoon

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Richard Hollingshead of Camden, N.J., built the first

drive-in theater in his driveway.

The idea was inspired by his mother who was a large woman

who found the seats at regular movie theaters uncomfortable.

He made it with a sheet strung between two trees and

a movie projector mounted to the hood of his car.

drive-in-theater

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Washington state’s Mt. Rainier is the tallest

volcano in the contiguous United States,

measuring nearly 14,500 feet in height.

It last erupted in 1854.

mount rainier washington us

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Despite their menacing appearance and fierce name,

dragonflies cannot sting and are harmless to human beings.

dragonfly

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When referring to China, make sure

to say the People’s Republic of China.

Leave off “People’s” and you’re talking about Taiwan.

china_taiwan

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Approximately one quarter of the United States’

homeless population are war veterans.

(Shameful statistic!)

homeless_veterans

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The inventors of bubble wrap,

Alfred Fielding and Marc Chavannes,

were originally trying to make plastic wallpaper.

bubble-wrap

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The toilet featured in Hitchcock’s Psycho

was the first flushing toilet to appear on-screen.

psycho toilet

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Frankincense, one of the precious items

the wise men gave the baby Jesus,

was actually an ancient form of chewing gum

Frankincense

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The poinsettia is named after former

congressman and ambassador Joel Poinsett,

who introduced the plant to the United States in the 1800s.

Joel Poinsett

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Peridots are the only gems that

have been found in meteorites.

Peridot August Birthstone

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The longest jellyfish on record measured 160 feet,

more than half the length of a football field.

Jellyfish

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All holly trees are gender specific – male or female.

Only the female holly tree bears fruit (berries),

and in order to do so there must be a male

pollinated tree within a two mile radius of her.

holly tree in park

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Two-thirds of the world’s lawyers live in the United States.

LawyersProtectArtists

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The Hard Rock Café got its name from a now-defunct bar that

appeared on the back of the Doors’ album Morrison Hotel.

Doors album cover Morrison Hotel - Hard Rock Cafe

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When cranberries are ripe, they bounce like a rubber ball.

cranberry

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Due to the “naughty” dancing of the can-can girls and

the scantily clad models on 1800s French postcards,

the British equated anything risqué with France.

In fact, that’s how the phrase “pardon my French” entered the vernacular.

can can dancers

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Scott Joplin’s famous piano song, “Maple Leaf Rag,”

was not named for the leaf or for Canada:

it was named for the Maple Leaf Club,

a social gathering place in Sedalia, Missouri.

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“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Another quiz for you today. Some easy ones but a few of them this time are quite difficult I think, but we’ll see what you make of them.

As usual the answers are waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay down below  –  but NO cheating please!

The best of luck and enjoy.

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quiz 05

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Q.  1:  What is Michael J. Fox’s middle name?

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Q.  2:  2013 is the first year this millennium this has happened, when was the previous time?

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Q.  3:  Only one U.S. state’s name ends with the letter “K.” Likewise, only one U.S. state’s name ends with the letter “G”. Name them. (A point for each correct answer.)

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Q.  4:  What was the “parental guidance” movie rating known as before it became “PG”?

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Q.  5:  I’m sure that at one time or another you have suffered from “sphenopalatine ganglioneuralgia”, but what is it more commonly known as?

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Q.  6:  For many years the Anglo-European Concorde super sonic passenger jet flew between London and New York. But what was the only internal route used by this airplane within the United States?

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Q.  7:  What is the small “You Are Here” sticker that indicates your position on a map called?

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Q.  8:  If your doctor says he is going to perform an “auscultation” on you what procedure would he or she be carrying out?

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Q.  9:  Though it’s not as well-known as the Grand Canyon what is name of the deepest gorge in the U.S. at nearly 8,000 feet?

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Q. 10:  What country has the most wild camels?

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Q. 11:  Who is the youngest man to become President of the USA and who is the youngest man to be elected President of the USA? (A point for each correct answer.)

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Q. 12:  Drug lord Pablo Escobar’s Medellin Cartel spent $2,500 a month on rubber bands. Why?  

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Q. 13:  Two of America’s greatest national symbols are The Liberty Bell and the Statue of Liberty. Where were they made? (A point for each correct answer.)

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Q. 14:  Which British liner was sunk off the Irish coast by a German submarine on 7th May 1915?

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Q. 15:  Which actress starred in the controversial movie ‘Rosemary’s Baby’?

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Q. 16:  The first armored presidential limo was used by President Franklin Roosevelt just as the United States was entering WW II. Who was its former owner?

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Q. 17:  In what American town or city was the TV series “Married With Children” set?

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Q. 18:  Nurse, Cookie Cutter, Blue, Zebra, Carpet, School, Bull and Wobbegong are all examples of what?

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Q. 19:  What is the name given to the Japanese crime organization?

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Q. 20:  Which American film director had the middle name Blount?

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ANSWERS

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Q.  1:  What is Michael J. Fox’s middle name?

A.  1:  Michael J. Fox’s middle name is Andrew.

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Q.  2:  2013 is the first year this millennium this has happened, when was the previous time?

A.  2:  1987 (Years where all four digits are different from one another.)

Q.  3:  Only one U.S. state’s name ends with the letter “K.” Likewise, only one U.S. state’s name ends with the letter “G”. Name them. (A point for each correct aswer.)

A.  3:  The U.S. state’s name ending with the letter “K” is New York. The U.S. state’s name ending with the letter “G” is Wyoming.

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Q.  4:  What was the “parental guidance” movie rating known as before it became “PG”?

A.  4:  It was known as “GP” (for General audience, Parental guidance suggested).

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Q.  5:  I’m sure that at one time or another you have suffered from “sphenopalatine ganglioneuralgia”, but what is it more commonly known as?

A.  5:  Sphenopalatine ganglioneuralgia is the medical term for ice cream headaches.

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Q.  6:  For many years the Anglo-European Concorde super sonic passenger jet flew between London and New York. But what was the only internal route used by this airplane within the United States?

A.  6:  The only inter-U.S. flights made by the Concorde were between New York’s JFK Airport and the oil-rich Texas metropolis of Dallas-Fort Worth.

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Q.  7:  What is the small “You Are Here” sticker that indicates your position on a map called?

A.  7:  It is called an ideo locator.

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Q.  8:  If your doctor says he is going to perform an “auscultation” on you what procedure would he or she be carrying out?

A.  8:  When a doctor performs an auscultation on you he or she will just be using his stethoscope.

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Q.  9:  Though it’s not as well-known as the Grand Canyon what is name of the deepest gorge in the U.S. at nearly 8,000 feet?

A.  9:  The deepest gorge in the U.S. at nearly 8,000 feet is called  Hell’s Canyon

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Q. 10:  What country has the most wild camels?

A. 10:  Australia.

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Q. 11:  Who is the youngest man to become President of the USA and who is the youngest man to be elected President of the USA? (A point for each correct answer.)

A. 11:  Teddy Roosevelt is the youngest man to become President (age 42) while John F Kennedy is the youngest man to be elected President (age 43).

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Q. 12:  Drug lord Pablo Escobar’s Medellin Cartel spent $2,500 a month on rubber bands. Why?  

A. 12:  To hold all their bundles of cash.

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Q. 13:  Two of America’s greatest national symbols are The Liberty Bell and the Statue of Liberty. Where were they made? (A point for each correct answer.)

A. 13:  The Liberty Bell was cast in England and the Statue of Liberty was crafted in France.

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Q. 14:  Which British liner was sunk off the Irish coast by a German submarine on 7th May 1915?

A. 14:  The Lusitania.   

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Q. 15:  Which actress starred in the controversial movie ‘Rosemary’s Baby’?

A. 15:  Mia Farrow.

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Q. 16:  The first armored presidential limo was used by President Franklin Roosevelt just as the United States was entering WW II. Who was its former owner?

A. 16:  This particular Cadillac convertible originally belonged to the gangster Al Capone. It was seized in 1932 when Capone was charged with tax evasion.

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Q. 17:  In which American town or city was the TV series “Married With Children” set?

A. 17:  Chicago.

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Q. 18:  Nurse, Cookie Cutter, Blue, Zebra, Carpet, School, Bull and Wobbegong are all examples of what?

A. 18:  Sharks.

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Q. 19:  What is the name given to the Japanese crime organization?

A. 19:  The Yakuza.

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Q. 20:  Which American film director had the middle name Blount?

A. 20:  Cecil B de Mille.

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“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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The Sunday Sermon

Generic Political Directional Signs

Don’t worry the title of this post doesn’t mean that you’re back at school again. This ‘term talk’ in the title refers to politics and politicians.

President Obama takes a lot of stick because of his headstrong insistence in implementing his Obamacare legislation. As I’ve said before, it’s a laudable goal, but the country can’t afford it. But on he goes anyway.

Love him or hate him, or neither, he’s limited to two terms of four years in office, then he has to go and make way for the next person who wants the job.

To begin with that’s a stupid system because the main thrust of the first Presidency about half way or so in office isn’t governing the country but instead trying to ensure election for a second term and wasting billions of dollars doing it.

4-four-more-years-button

It doesn’t take a genius to work out that the present system sucks. Nor do you have to be a professor of politics to suggest an alternative  –  for example a single term of five or six years, which still leaves plenty of time to settle into the job and implement whatever policies you have promised the electorate.

So that’s the first problem solved.

However, there is another term problem that infests American politics (and many other countries too).

What about the rest of the elected politicians?

Well, why not introduce the same system for them? Elected for a five or six year term after which they have to start to earn a living again?

Sounds good to me.

According to Wikipedia John Dingell has managed 58 years in the House and still going. John Conyers has been there for 49 years. Coincidentally both these politicians are Democrats and both represent Michigan, so another problem that these ‘lifers’ cause is that there is no incentive for new blood to enter politics when they have little or no chance of being selected for election.

john_dingell

Congressman John Dingell

I’m not picking on these guys in particular. They just happen to be the two longest serving examples. There were others of similar longevity but they had the good grace to eventually retire, or die after half a century or so. Amazingly more than one hundred members of Congress have been allowed to serve for at least 36 years.

When I say “serve” I am just using the normal expression for these jobs. Whether they realize it or not, career politicians are nothing more than parasites living a cozy life off the money provided by the rest of us through our taxes. When an elected representative is entrenched in his or her position for a very long period of time they are not serving their people, they are simply relying on their people to provide them with a good living, premier health care and generous pension benefits (assuming they retire eventually!).

“Ah,” I hear someone say. “But what about the ‘experience’ that these long serving members bring?”

“Oh,” I reply. “What about it? Have we not seen in recent years and months that whatever experience they bring is not worth a hell of a lot. Just look at the mess the country is in and tell me if fresh faces could do any worse.”

So the solution to the two worst political problems that face America are easily solved.

The next question is will they be solved?

And the answer to that is probably ‘NO’. And it is probably ‘NO’ because the people who have the power to change the law are the very people that that law would affect.

turkeys voting for Christmas

They say turkeys wouldn’t vote for Thanksgiving or Christmas.

Asses and elephants probably wouldn’t vote for this idea either.

What a pity.

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“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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No, it’s not just me.

Loads of people like puns and pun day.

Here’s another one.

Enjoy!

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rofl

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If you’re fishing for compliments

it’s best to use allure.

fishing for compliments

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I just pitched a tent in the garden.

Surprised myself how far I could throw it.

tent--colored-cartoon-illustration

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I was telling a friend that I made a

ventriloquist’s dummy out of some old carpet.

“Any good?” he queried.

“Nah, it’s ruggish,” I replied.

ventriloquist's dummy

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I was stunned to find my Taser gun was still switched on.

Taser-Gun

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I shouldn’t have dumped my girlfriend after

overhearing her making fun of my poor endowment.

Turned out she was a financial adviser

endowment

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I’ve been using X and Y chromosomes in my

adverts recently since, after all, sex cells…

X and Y chromosomes

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Last night I looked up at the stars and thought:

“It’s crap being a dwarf in Hollywood.”

grumpy dwarf

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When I was young, I used to think CCTV was

a very positive Spanish television channel.

cctv4

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I’ve got an injured extraterrestrial in my shed.

He’s missing an eye.

I’ve called him Alen.

one eyed alien

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My dog’s been sitting in the corner, feeling

sorry for himself, for three days.

I knew I shouldn’t have bought a Pitiful Terrier

scared-dog

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I saw a headline in the local paper:

“Huge Grant Saves Derelict Theatre”.

I thought: That was nice of him.

hugh grant

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I’m a doctor. My wife’s a judge.

She knows how to try my patients.

judge-with-gavel

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My missus says she is leaving me because of my obsession with pool.

“Come on love”, I said. “Give me a break”.

pool break

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I thought I’d dug up an unknown species

of dinosaur in my back garden.

Excitedly I phoned the Natural History Museum,

but it turned out to be a fossil arm.

fossil

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I’ve taken thousands of showers over the years.

Never been caught once.

shower-cartoon

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A friend asked me if I knew any words that could describe relief.

I told him I know a phew

phew

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I bought a new thesaurus today.

It’s nothing to write house about.

thesaurus

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I went for a colonic irrigation today,

then got hit with a huge $659 bill.

It really cleaned me out.

colonic-irrigation

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I phoned up the incontinence hotline today and

the lady on the other end asked where I’m ringing from.

I said, “From the waist down.”

incontinence hot line

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What do Mexican Robots Eat?

Silicon-Carne

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“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Time for a mid-week rant I think.

danger bureaucrats at work

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You may have noticed from the tag line of this blog that its major theme is to expose stupidity and bureaucracy and hopefully to encourage people to fight against it, rather than meekly fall in line with every idiotic rule and regulation that the bureaucratic morons introduce to make our lives a misery.

It is one of those curious contradictions in life that the stupider people are, the more they complicate things and the more they try to regulate things that require no regulation.

They just don’t understand that simplicity can sometimes be the most effective solution to problems – if indeed the problems they perceive even exist in the first place.

On the other hand, things that do need regulating, like the banksters for example, are left largely without interference.

how many bureaucrats does it take to screw in light bulb

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The big question is, why do these idiot bureaucrats needlessly complicate our lives? 

Many years ago I figured it out.

They do it to try to enhance their own importance. It’s as easy as that.

Let’s face it, most bureaucratic jobs don’t take a rocket scientist’s brain to cope with them. They are easy and repetitive but if done correctly can be completed quickly and without upsetting anyone.

But the bureaucrats won’t have it that way. Complicate the task is their solution. If they do that they need more staff to help them. If they have more staff they get to be in charge of more people, which makes them more important. If they complicate it even more they might need a whole department. And on and on it goes.

In the business world there are empire builders in all large companies. People of mediocre ability, but with enough survival instinct to create a belief that what they do is useful to the company. 

As time goes on they are able to hide within their little empires inside a company and no one questions if what they are doing is really needed and certainly few realize how dumb they are. It is only once they leave this safe environment that the truth becomes clearer.

I have encountered several of these beasts out in the open and it is not a pretty sight. They are so dumb that they have forgotten how dumb they really are. Inflated with their artificially induced and undeserved stature within their former companies they imagine that out in the real world they are, not just ‘as good’ as everyone else, but ‘better’ than everyone else! Invariably they make a mess of things, but unfortunately they cause a lot of damage, sometimes irreparable, before they are caught on and fired. 

Obviously the same type of people are in public life too. In fact this is where they excel, because here it is much harder to pin down their accountability and fire them. In many cases the people who have the power to fire them are exactly the same types and the last thing they want to do is diminish the size of their own empires.

baseball cap bureaucrats suck

Have you ever noticed that an average town or city can function quite well and efficiently with a mayor and a handful of administrators.

Yet if you take the same town or city ten years later, while it probably hasn’t changed much as regards size, (only in exceptional circumstances would it have doubled or trebled its population or area), it’s local bureaucracy has more than doubled and trebled in size, probably a lot more. It probably also has an increasing number of by-laws and regulations and to pay for it all more and more property and other taxes are being demanded from the community. Clearly all this additional bureaucracy is not needed. But it is there and will continue to grow.

Why do we allow this? Why do we keep electing people whose only idea seems to be the provision of the same basic services at an ever increasing cost?

Big government, federal government, is even worse.

The European Parliament, for example, churns out regulation after regulation after regulation, about ridiculous things like how straight a cucumber should be or how bent a banana can be and still be called a banana! 

Washington has adopted the same strategy, sticking its nose in things that are none of its business and that only serve to hinder rather than help the people who elected them.

banana wars

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It’s about time we tried to stop this spiral into disaster.

It’s time big brother and all his little administrators had their noses put out of joint. 

Remember, “Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”,  wherever and whenever you can!

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Did You Know? It’s Fascinating Fact day.

Posted: October 22, 2013 in Factoids
Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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It’s another “Did You Know” day on the fasab blog.

More random facts to get your head around.

Enjoy.

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did you know4

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The first Dunkin Donuts and the first Howard Johnson’s

were both in Quincy, Massachusetts.

Dunkin Donuts

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The Pennsylvania Dutch are not really Dutch.

They are a people of German ancestry living in

southeastern Pennsylvania, primarily in Lancaster County.

“German” in German is “Deutsch.”

Pennsylvania Dutch

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The Gateway Arch in St. Louis

is as wide at its base as it is tall (630 feet).

Gateway Arch dimensions

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Ohio State offers a course called “Sports for the Spectator.”

Students are taught how to be

“an informed and appreciative sports spectator.”

obama-ohio-state-2

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Telephone cards first took off in Hawaii,

since long-distance charges from the far-flung state

were higher than anywhere else in the country.

prepaid-phone-cards

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What day were you born on?

Apparently Tuesday is the most popular day of the week for giving birth,

a fact that has nothing to do with Nature

and everything to do with hospital staffing;

elective C-sections and induced labors

are often scheduled during traditional working hours.

Calendar

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The majority of the text in the Monroe Doctrine

was actually penned by John Quincy Adams.

The Monroe Doctrine

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Despite its reputation as a cosmonaut staple,

freeze-dried ice cream only made one mission to space.

In 1968, it provided instant sugar rushes to the astronauts of Apollo 7.

astronaut_icecream

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In car design circles, a hood ornament is properly called a “mascot.”

The first American automobile to sport a mascot was the 1912 Cadillac.

1912_Cadillac

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Albert Einstein never received a Nobel Prize

for his theory of relativity.

Pigeon Books Albert Einstein Relativity

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On November 18th, 1913, pilot Lincoln Beachey was the

first person to make a complete loop-de-loop in an airplane.

Lincoln_Beachey_in_his_plane

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The first man to appear on the cover of Playboy

was the actor Peter Sellers.

sellers_playboy_cover_april_64

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West Virginia is no longer the coal-mining capital of the U.S.,

nine of the ten top-producing coal mines are currently located in Wyoming.

open cast coal mine

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The popular game Bingo was originally called “Beano”

because players used beans to cover the numbered squares.

Bingo

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Cruise control and automatic transmissions were invented

by a blind engineer named Ralph Teetor.

Ralph Teetor

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Modern scholars believe that Jericho,

settled around 10,000 years ago,

was the first walled city in the world.

jericho_walls_wide_view

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The human bone most often broken is the clavicle (collar bone).

clavicle

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Swearing to tell

“the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth”

dates back to English Common Law.

Interestingly enough, there were no penalties for perjury until the 1600s;

prior to that time, it was believed that the fear of God’s wrath

was enough to keep witnesses honest.

The truth the whole truth

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According to doctors, humans have an average

of 14 episodes of flatulence per day.

(I always knew I was above average!)

humorous-fish-farting-animation-flatulence-comedy-animated-picture

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The Harlem Globetotters were originally a Chicago based team (1927).

They did not play a game in Harlem until the 1960s.

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“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Yes, time to test those brains again.

Another selection of twenty random questions to stimulate the mind and memory.

As usual the answers are waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay down below, but please NO cheating!

Enjoy and good luck.

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quiz 06

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Q.  1:  What was the first commercial jet airliner?

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Q.  2:  In which American town or city was the TV series Cannon set?

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Q.  3:  ‘John ‘the cat’ Robie’ was the debonair central character in which popular movie?

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Q.  4:  In 1894, which French officer was convicted of treason and sent to Devil’s island?

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Q.  5:  The name of which edible product stems from the Portugese word for the quince fruit?

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Q.  6:  Spats Columbo is the bad guy in which popular black and white movie that starred Marilyn Monroe?

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Q.  7:  What ship conveyed 120 anti-Catholic Puritans across the Atlantic in 1620?

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Q.  8:  Pluto orbits our sun once every how many years?

    a) 8 years

    b) 16 years

    c) 86 years

    d) 248 years

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Q.  9:  In the 1968 movie when was ‘The Space Odyssey’?

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Q. 10:  In what country did the Long March of 1934 take place?

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Q. 11:  The common cold is what kind of virus? Five letters

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Q. 12:  The Bridge of Sighs in Venice connected the Doge’s palace to what?

    a) a state prison and place of execution

    b) a tax office

    c) a cemetary

    d) a Turkish bath house

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Q. 13:  What type of Cowboy was Jon Voight in the 1969 movie?

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Q. 14:  Which European country did not grant women the right to vote until 1971?

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Q. 15:  Which best selling and often banned book apparently inspired Mark David Chapman to murder John Lennon?

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Q. 16:  What did Winston Churchill describe as “a riddle wrapped in a mystery, inside an enigma”?

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Q. 17:  Who were the three famous personalities who starred in the popular ‘Road To’ movie series made during the 1940s, 1950s and 1960s?  (A point for each correct answer.)

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Q. 18:  On 18th March 1965 what was Alexi Leonov the first man to achieve?

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Q. 19:  What is Donald Duck’s middle (i.e. second) name?

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Q. 20:  Which of the following is a theory in physics?

    a) Schrödinger’s dog

    b) Schrödinger’s cat

    c) Schrödinger’s butterfly

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ANSWERS

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Q.  1:  What was the first commercial jet airliner?

A.  1:  The Comet.

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Q.  2:  In which American town or city was the TV series Cannon set?

A.  2:  Los Angeles.

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Q.  3:  ‘John ‘the cat’ Robie’ was the debonair central character in which popular movie?

A.  3:  To Catch A Thief (Cary Grant played John Robie)

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Q.  4:  In 1894, which French officer was convicted of treason and sent to Devil’s island?

A.  4:  Captain Alfred Dreyfus.

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Q.  5:  The name of which edible product stems from the Portugese word for the quince fruit?

A.  5:  Marmalade (from marmelo). 

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Q.  6:  Spats Columbo is the bad guy in which popular black and white movie that starred Marilyn Monroe?

A.  6:  Some Like It Hot.

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Q.  7:  What ship conveyed 120 anti-Catholic Puritans across the Atlantic in 1620?

A.  7:  The Mayflower.

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Q.  8:  Pluto orbits our sun once every how many years?

    a) 8 years

    b) 16 years

    c) 86 years

    d) 248 years

A.  8:  d) 248 years

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Q.  9:  In the 1968 movie when was ‘The Space Odyssey’?

A.  9:  2001.

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Q. 10:  In what country did the Long March of 1934 take place?

A. 10:  China.

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Q. 11:  The common cold is what kind of virus? Five letters

A. 11:  Rhino.

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Q. 12:  The Bridge of Sighs in Venice connected the Doge’s palace to what?

    a) a state prison and place of execution

    b) a tax office

    c) a cemetary

    d) a Turkish bath house

A. 12:  d) A state prison and place of execution

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Q. 13:  What type of Cowboy was Jon Voight in the 1969 movie?

A. 13:  Midnight.

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Q. 14:  Which European country did not grant women the right to vote until 1971?

A. 14:  Switzerland.

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Q. 15:  Which best selling and often banned book apparently inspired Mark David Chapman to murder John Lennon?

A. 15:  The Catcher in the Rye, a 1951 novel by J. D. Salinger, whose protagonist and antihero, Holden Caulfield, has become an icon for teenage rebellion.

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Q. 16:  What did Winston Churchill describe as “a riddle wrapped in a mystery, inside an enigma”?

A. 16:  Russia.

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Q. 17:  Who were the three famous personalities who starred in the popular ‘Road To’ movie series made during the 1940s, 1950s and 1960s?  (A point for each correct answer.)

A. 17:  Bob Hope, Dorothy Lamour and Bing Crosby.

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Q. 18:  On 18th March 1965 what was Alexi Leonov the first man to achieve?

A. 18:  Walk in Space.

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Q. 19:  What is Donald Duck’s middle (i.e. second) name?

A. 19:  Fauntleroy.

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Q. 20:  Which of the following is a theory in physics?

    a) Schrödinger’s dog

    b) Schrödinger’s cat

    c) Schrödinger’s butterfly

A. 20:  b) Schrödinger’s cat which is a thought experiment, sometimes described as a paradox in quantum mechanics. In the course of developing this experiment, Schrödinger coined the term Verschränkung (entanglement).

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“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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padlock

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I’m not sure what the correct official term is, but now that the “Shutdown” crisis is over let’s hope it’s the “Shut-Up”.

For another few months anyway, Obama and the other inmates in the Washington asylum have managed to kick the can down the road again.

Who can tell who won the pissing contest. It seemed to me like there was a strong wind a blowin’ and they all got covered in it – piss, that is, not glory!

cartoon-shutdown-housegop-boehner

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But Obama has signed HR 2775 and made it the law of the land. The Treasury Department is authorized to suspend the debt ceiling, which to you and me means that the government can now spend as much as it likes and borrow as much as it likes. Start the printing presses boys!

We’ll have to go through it all again in February next year but I think what has happened this time has set a precedent for the debt ceiling to be removed completely to pay for Obamacare and a few more wars. It was all nonsense anyway.

It’s never a good thing to live beyond your means as many people throughout America and Europe discovered when the banksters stole our money, credit lines dried up and the real estate catastrophe occurred.

America will find that out too sometime down that long road that the can is being kicked. But leave that problem for your grandchildren.

For now its spend, spend, spend!!!

empty pockets

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“Fight Against Stupidity And Bureaucracy”

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Happily we don’t live in the middle ages, so now resistance is futile.

If you haven’t guessed already….

It’s pun day!

Enjoy.

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rofl

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I’m in a band called Atom

We’ll never split.

Stylised_Lithium_Atom

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I’ve been drawing bar graphs, pie charts

and venn diagrams all over walls in town.

I’m a graphitti artist.

bar graphs, pie charts and venn diagrams

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We were going for a picnic today and my husband

asked me to get some ice and a cooler bag.

I thought, “That’s a bit harsh,

there’s nothing wrong with my current bag”.

cooler_bag_full

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Can someone give me a definition of homosexuality,

in lay-men’s terms?

gay_closet

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On the investment front I’m worried that my shares in a

major cordial company are going to be diluted.

raspberry-cordial

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Don’t trust people who avoid the sun.

They’re shady.

shady people

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Signing up to a mailing list has done nothing to

quell my addiction for German poetry.

I’m getting verse by the day.

German poetry

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According to a survey,

seven out of ten people use the double negative.

I ain’t never heard such nonsense in my life.

do not put nothing here

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The horse came galloping towards me,

the sun glistening off the rider’s armour, helmet and lance,

which I realised was aimed at my head.

Man, those knight-vision goggles are really awesome!

knight

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Running a bingo hall is more than just a job.

It’s a calling.

bingo-hall

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Whilst on holiday near lake Geneva

I purchased a large bottle of mineral water

I struggled to carry it though,

it was an evian.

evian bottle

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There are two i’s in narcissist

and they absolutely hate each other.

narcissism-and-preaching

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After a terrible Chinese meal last night, I refused to pay.

Unfortunately the chef heard what I said and pinned me up against the wall,

threatening me with a pan unless I paid up.

Talk about being stuck between a wok and a hard place.

AntCreationsChineseChef

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I saw a man with a bald patch earlier.

I thought, “He’s obviously trying to cut down, or quit being bald”.

bald-spot

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It appears that smoking heroin is

far better for addicts than injecting it,

needleless to say.

druggie cartoon

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A girl from Prague stopped me in town earlier and

asked where the best shop for clothes was.

I said “Check Republic.”

republic store

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What do you call a brittle Scotsman?

A Glasswegian.

Scotsman

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I hate it when people make jokes about Vietnam.

It Hanoi’s me.

Vietnam Map

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Jay-Z? A psychiatrist?

Must be Shrink Rap.

jay-z

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We spent a fortune on electrocution lessons for our son.

Until he learned to speak properly.

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